In an office party, the HR department claims I misbehaved with a girl, while I am certain no such incident occurred. My colleagues, who were with me from start to finish, can attest to this. However, HR is unwilling to listen to either me or my witnesses, and it feels as though they are pressuring me to admit to something I didn't do. My concern is no longer about the job; I want to prove my innocence as this is a matter of my ethical and moral values. Please advise me on how I can proceed.
From India, Bangalore
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From India, Bangalore
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Addressing Workplace Bullying Allegations
This appears to be an act of "workplace bullying." Such wild allegations cannot be made lightly. You have a right to know about the specific complaint and the complainant. It must be conveyed to you in writing.
As long as you have sufficient witnesses vouching for you and who can testify to your innocence and non-involvement, there is nothing to worry about. Such loose and random actions just speak about the culture and standard of the company; nothing more.
Warm regards.
From India, Delhi
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1446This appears to be an act of "workplace bullying." Such wild allegations cannot be made lightly. You have a right to know about the specific complaint and the complainant. It must be conveyed to you in writing.
As long as you have sufficient witnesses vouching for you and who can testify to your innocence and non-involvement, there is nothing to worry about. Such loose and random actions just speak about the culture and standard of the company; nothing more.
Warm regards.
From India, Delhi
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The term "Workplace Bullying" was rightly used by Raj Kumar ji. Many times, people fall under such false accusations at work, and they wonder how to get out or prove such wrongful statements. One of the biggest mistakes "the accused" makes is, upon hearing such a blame, they get upset and lose their temper.
Yes, your point about gathering plentiful evidence is most required. If HR coerces you, you may approach other management-level personnel until you are proven accurate. You may also make a point to check your records from your tenure with the company. A group meeting—consisting of HR, a couple of other people from management, the girl (victim), and you (the accused)—would need to assemble and record the discussion appropriately, which might reveal the facts along with substantiations to support your case.
P.S: My only suggestion to you is: do not panic. Losing your nerve will throw somebody into disarray.
From India, Visakhapatnam
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Yes, your point about gathering plentiful evidence is most required. If HR coerces you, you may approach other management-level personnel until you are proven accurate. You may also make a point to check your records from your tenure with the company. A group meeting—consisting of HR, a couple of other people from management, the girl (victim), and you (the accused)—would need to assemble and record the discussion appropriately, which might reveal the facts along with substantiations to support your case.
P.S: My only suggestion to you is: do not panic. Losing your nerve will throw somebody into disarray.
From India, Visakhapatnam
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Raj and Sharmila have given good advice. I would only add that if your company has a grievance procedure, you should instigate it immediately, citing false and malicious accusations. It is for HR and the girl to prove, not you.
Hope the above helps.
Regards,
Harsh
From United Kingdom, Barrow
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Hope the above helps.
Regards,
Harsh
From United Kingdom, Barrow
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Understanding the Situation
Why have you been framed into it? If there were others with you when the incident took place, why weren't they booked?
We understand settling personal scores. However, framing harassment is the worst form, as the investigation and the stigma involved are too significant for any woman to handle. An event may seem small when it happens, hence neglected, even though it may have multiple repercussions later. A casual eve teasing snowballs into emotional torture in no time. Any situation can spiral out of hand, even without you doing anything.
Planning Your Course of Action
Before you plan your course of action, please weigh all the factors that stand against you. Guilty or not, it is the prerogative of the officials to judge. You remain clear of the actions and intentions.
From India, Mumbai
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Why have you been framed into it? If there were others with you when the incident took place, why weren't they booked?
We understand settling personal scores. However, framing harassment is the worst form, as the investigation and the stigma involved are too significant for any woman to handle. An event may seem small when it happens, hence neglected, even though it may have multiple repercussions later. A casual eve teasing snowballs into emotional torture in no time. Any situation can spiral out of hand, even without you doing anything.
Planning Your Course of Action
Before you plan your course of action, please weigh all the factors that stand against you. Guilty or not, it is the prerogative of the officials to judge. You remain clear of the actions and intentions.
From India, Mumbai
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Understanding Both Sides of the Story
Normally, only one side of the case is presented here. The advice or suggestions we provide will be based on what is presented to us. However, like an honest judge, unless and otherwise the inputs are free, fair, and frank, our opinion will be lopsided. Never go by what we have suggested. Please touch your heart and confirm that you have really been fair in presenting the true facts here.
In any organization, it is possible a few may be indulging in bullying, but I don't think the whole bunch of employees will be out against you with knives drawn! Hence, we need to receive inputs from both sides! Best wishes
From India, Bengaluru
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Normally, only one side of the case is presented here. The advice or suggestions we provide will be based on what is presented to us. However, like an honest judge, unless and otherwise the inputs are free, fair, and frank, our opinion will be lopsided. Never go by what we have suggested. Please touch your heart and confirm that you have really been fair in presenting the true facts here.
In any organization, it is possible a few may be indulging in bullying, but I don't think the whole bunch of employees will be out against you with knives drawn! Hence, we need to receive inputs from both sides! Best wishes
From India, Bengaluru
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Understanding Your Rights Under New Harassment Laws
This is an interesting case that people have been predicting will happen with the new laws to protect women from harassment. Your company and HR are required to follow the law on the prevention of sexual harassment. The question is whether they are following the law.
- Has a complaint been filed (oral or written)?
- Or is HR acting on hearsay?
- Has HR initiated an investigation or presented it before the ICC under the act for investigation?
- Have you been given a chance to explain the incident (or to present your witness)? It is required under the rules of natural justice.
If this has not been done, then you can file a complaint with the grievance authority in the company against the actions of your HR and ask them to investigate the matter and allow you to present your evidence.
From India, Mumbai
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This is an interesting case that people have been predicting will happen with the new laws to protect women from harassment. Your company and HR are required to follow the law on the prevention of sexual harassment. The question is whether they are following the law.
- Has a complaint been filed (oral or written)?
- Or is HR acting on hearsay?
- Has HR initiated an investigation or presented it before the ICC under the act for investigation?
- Have you been given a chance to explain the incident (or to present your witness)? It is required under the rules of natural justice.
If this has not been done, then you can file a complaint with the grievance authority in the company against the actions of your HR and ask them to investigate the matter and allow you to present your evidence.
From India, Mumbai
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It is not the HR department's role to initiate a sexual harassment case, but rather the victim of the harassment. If the HR department issues any notice, ask for an attested copy of the written complaint received from the complainant. A written complaint is mandatory. If there is indeed any written complaint, your course of action should be to obtain statements from all your colleagues who were with you during the time in question, confirming that they did not notice any such incident and that the woman in question was not nearby, etc. In any case, if there is a written complaint from a woman, such a complaint will hold higher acceptability, and HR will have to appoint a senior lady official in your company to investigate the matter.
The Flip Side of Sexual Harassment Laws
While the law against sexual harassment is welcomed, there is a flip side to it. The law can be misused by anyone, including unions representing female employees or even your colleagues who could coerce a woman to file a complaint to get rid of someone. Female employees could even use this as a weapon against their own bosses in response to actions taken against them for indiscipline, tardiness, or poor performance. As a result, I am afraid many employers will be reluctant to hire women in the future. I know many officers in government departments who are hesitant to have a female secretary or avoid female employees coming to their chambers due to several false complaints by women or under the influence of their union, unrelated to sexual harassment.
It would not be surprising to witness a law originally intended to protect women in the workplace resulting in reduced opportunities for women in private employment and the complete avoidance of working women in the government sector. That would indeed be a sad day.
Regards,
O. Abdul Hameed
Formerly Addl. Commissioner
ESIC
From India, Coimbatore
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The Flip Side of Sexual Harassment Laws
While the law against sexual harassment is welcomed, there is a flip side to it. The law can be misused by anyone, including unions representing female employees or even your colleagues who could coerce a woman to file a complaint to get rid of someone. Female employees could even use this as a weapon against their own bosses in response to actions taken against them for indiscipline, tardiness, or poor performance. As a result, I am afraid many employers will be reluctant to hire women in the future. I know many officers in government departments who are hesitant to have a female secretary or avoid female employees coming to their chambers due to several false complaints by women or under the influence of their union, unrelated to sexual harassment.
It would not be surprising to witness a law originally intended to protect women in the workplace resulting in reduced opportunities for women in private employment and the complete avoidance of working women in the government sector. That would indeed be a sad day.
Regards,
O. Abdul Hameed
Formerly Addl. Commissioner
ESIC
From India, Coimbatore
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Response to Sexual Harassment Allegation
Dear Friend,
It is not the HR department's role to initiate a sexual harassment case; it is the victim of the harassment who should do so. If the HR department issues any notice, ask for an attested copy of the written complaint received from the complainant. A written complaint is mandatory. If there is indeed a written complaint, your course of action should involve obtaining statements from all your colleagues who were with you during the time in question to confirm that they did not witness any such incident and that the woman in question was not nearby, etc. In any case, if there is a written complaint from a woman, such a complaint will hold greater weight, and HR will have to appoint a senior female official in your company to investigate the matter.
While the law against sexual harassment is welcomed, there is a flip side to it. The law can be misused by anyone, including unions representing female employees or even your colleagues who may coerce a woman to make a complaint to get rid of someone. Female employees may even use this as a weapon against their superiors if there is any disciplinary action, tardiness, or poor performance on their part. As a result, I fear that many employers will be hesitant to hire women in the future. I know many officers in government departments who are reluctant to have a female secretary or avoid female employees coming to their chambers due to several false complaints by women or at the behest of their union, for reasons other than sexual harassment.
I would not be surprised to see a law meant to protect women in the workplace leading to reduced opportunities for women in private employment and a complete avoidance of working women in the government sector. That would be a sad day.
O. Abdul Hameed
Formerly Addl. Commissioner
ESIC
Jb Hameedji,
Great to see a thoughtful response from a person at a high level. Hopefully, what you said is indeed a reality. Many working women tend to dominate, mislead, and misguide managements, causing harm to sincere working men. Please share your email ID with me via my mobile number [Phone Number Removed For Privacy Reasons] so that I can discuss my views and experiences, which I cannot openly express in this forum.
Regards,
S. Rao
Hyderabad
From India, Hyderabad
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Dear Friend,
It is not the HR department's role to initiate a sexual harassment case; it is the victim of the harassment who should do so. If the HR department issues any notice, ask for an attested copy of the written complaint received from the complainant. A written complaint is mandatory. If there is indeed a written complaint, your course of action should involve obtaining statements from all your colleagues who were with you during the time in question to confirm that they did not witness any such incident and that the woman in question was not nearby, etc. In any case, if there is a written complaint from a woman, such a complaint will hold greater weight, and HR will have to appoint a senior female official in your company to investigate the matter.
While the law against sexual harassment is welcomed, there is a flip side to it. The law can be misused by anyone, including unions representing female employees or even your colleagues who may coerce a woman to make a complaint to get rid of someone. Female employees may even use this as a weapon against their superiors if there is any disciplinary action, tardiness, or poor performance on their part. As a result, I fear that many employers will be hesitant to hire women in the future. I know many officers in government departments who are reluctant to have a female secretary or avoid female employees coming to their chambers due to several false complaints by women or at the behest of their union, for reasons other than sexual harassment.
I would not be surprised to see a law meant to protect women in the workplace leading to reduced opportunities for women in private employment and a complete avoidance of working women in the government sector. That would be a sad day.
O. Abdul Hameed
Formerly Addl. Commissioner
ESIC
Jb Hameedji,
Great to see a thoughtful response from a person at a high level. Hopefully, what you said is indeed a reality. Many working women tend to dominate, mislead, and misguide managements, causing harm to sincere working men. Please share your email ID with me via my mobile number [Phone Number Removed For Privacy Reasons] so that I can discuss my views and experiences, which I cannot openly express in this forum.
Regards,
S. Rao
Hyderabad
From India, Hyderabad
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Others have given you valuable and sound ideas based on the limited information you have provided. Hence, let me raise a few questions about the scenario.
Questions to Consider
What type of organization do you work for? When you mention a party, what kind of party was it? Were alcoholic drinks served, and if so, did you and your friends drink? If you did, were you "tipsy"? I ask this question because people can behave differently when under the influence of alcohol. For instance, at a Christmas party I attended in the UK, some individuals of Asian descent had consumed a few drinks, and one of them was persistently asking a local girl to dance with him. Some girls might perceive such behavior as harassment. Whether an action is considered misbehavior or not depends on how it is interpreted.
Finally, as others have suggested, you should seek details about what transpired, even if not from whom. Then, you can proceed from there.
Thank you.
From United Kingdom
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Questions to Consider
What type of organization do you work for? When you mention a party, what kind of party was it? Were alcoholic drinks served, and if so, did you and your friends drink? If you did, were you "tipsy"? I ask this question because people can behave differently when under the influence of alcohol. For instance, at a Christmas party I attended in the UK, some individuals of Asian descent had consumed a few drinks, and one of them was persistently asking a local girl to dance with him. Some girls might perceive such behavior as harassment. Whether an action is considered misbehavior or not depends on how it is interpreted.
Finally, as others have suggested, you should seek details about what transpired, even if not from whom. Then, you can proceed from there.
Thank you.
From United Kingdom
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I would suggest asking them to bring the witness who saw you misbehaving with that girl. If the girl doesn't have a witness, then you can point out that you have a witness to prove your innocence. Question the whereabouts of the witness from the girl's side.
Thank you.
From India, Mumbai
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Thank you.
From India, Mumbai
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