Have you ever had someone tell you about a problem or concern they are having, and your mind automatically starts thinking of a solution for them? Probably, we all have. Somehow, that seems to be an automatic response for most people; especially in response to people we love and care about. Often, though, all the speaker wants (often without even knowing it) is simply to be heard and understood. It can take an act of will to notice the urge to offer a fix and hold your tongue.
Next time this happens to you, don't jump right in with a solution; try listening instead and asking them if there is more they would like to say about that until they are emptied out. Then, rather than offering a solution, ask them if they would like you to hear your ideas about what they could do. People feel much better about receiving solutions and answers they have asked for.
With regards,
Vipul
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From India
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9Next time this happens to you, don't jump right in with a solution; try listening instead and asking them if there is more they would like to say about that until they are emptied out. Then, rather than offering a solution, ask them if they would like you to hear your ideas about what they could do. People feel much better about receiving solutions and answers they have asked for.
With regards,
Vipul
(Link removed)
From India
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I was born and brought up in Ahmedabad and studied in a Gujarati medium. There was a Gujarati lesson named "AAnjani" (which means a small tumor on the upper or lower eyelid) written by Jyotindra Dave, a well-known author of Gujarati. Once the author had AAnjani, and during that time, whoever met him offered one piece of advice or another. Eventually, the author had to undergo an operation, as a small disease worsened significantly. The story was a strong critique of our habit of freely giving advice without a deep understanding of the subject or sometimes without being asked by the person. Your message reminded me of that beautiful story.
From India, Ahmadabad
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From India, Ahmadabad
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Excellent point... can solve most of the interpersonal problems one faces and reduce those to a large extent. You have written, "Next time this happens to you, don't jump right in with a solution, try listening instead...", this too is an advice, however, it is well taken :) :):).
Ramesh
From India, Pune
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Ramesh
From India, Pune
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