Hi guys,

Some of u online helped me draft a letter addressed to a group of realtionship managers in my org for not turning up on a pre decided scheduled session. fyi, i'm displaying the mail below:


Dear All,

This is to remind you that all of you were intimated to attend the session on Client Interfacing Skills,

scheduled on Tues, 15-May-2007 at 13:30 hrs.

The significance of the said session need not be highlighted to the participants. It is really disappointing

to know that none of you attended this training inspite of informing you well in advance.

I hope you will not do this in future. This is highly inconvenient for us.

I know that with a bit of perseverance, we can overcome this.

Please let me know your consensus for rescheduling the next session.

Looking forward to a positive response next time.


Now these guys feel that i'm being stern being a communication trainer.

they've addressed this concern to the hr manager.

I'm a Training Manager and not a trainer but since v don't any trainers recruited in my org. am playing the role of the trainer as well.

I feel these guys always want me to say a "please" "thank you" everytime i write or say irrespective if the situation demands or not.

now the hr manager has said that v'll 've an open meet wherein they'll cum up with their concerns in her presence.

friends, i'm really pissed by their attitude. i also feel they've this attitude that they r managers but then how about me? ain't i one?

i feel to recite this song:

"I try so hard and got so far and in the end it doesn't even matter."

i've always been extra careful when I comunicate with anyone out here.

and now this is what i hget.


Please suggest all gurus here. Please....

Thanks for taking the time to go through this note.



From India, Pune
India's 1st Strategic Strengths Coach, Corporate
Asst. Manager - Hr
Communication Specialist
Am Training
Consultant Trainer
Hr Generalist
Steney Idicala
Manager - Hr
Shraddha Nanavaty
Sr. Manager - L&d
Hr Professional
+1 Other

Dear Kavita,
It is always expected from people belonging to HR processes that they should be polite, humble, approachable and down to earth.
This always helps in the performance of duties.
Dont feel offending but try to put 'thank you' , 'please', 'I would appreciate' rather than 'u must', 'u ought to' , 'u r expected to' etc.
Be a little diplomatic.

From India, Bhopal

thanks Meghamadhulika!
I understand that v ought 2 polite but do u think in the above mail am being impolite? i've always used those popular words nd wud continue 2 use them.
fyi, these managers had agreed in person together on the decided schedule. i had also formally sent a mail across all of them announcing the scheduled program.
now, inspite of all this they don't turn up on that scheduled time nd my efforts nd time i tuk 4 the preparation goes in vain(i cud ignore that).
but being a trng manager i feel it's my reponsibilty to send across the above quoted mail. am not sure how far u or any gurus out here wud agree 2 this.
pls suggest how shud i take this further in the meet.

From India, Pune

Hi Kavita,

Also remember that "being polite" need not get translated as "become doormat".

Having said this, there is absolutely no reason why you should not draw up a list of your concerns with these managers. These can be discussed in the same meeting - it cannot be a one way traffic. Rather than it being a "you didn't do this, so now do this", ask them to help solve the issues. Propose suggestions rather that announce solutions.

Being polite is always a good strategy. It is a good tool to open many doors easily. Other people would like to see HR as quiet, polite, etc. This stereotyping occurs for all people in all departments. It is good to live up to this perception, and it is even better to make them understand that there is more to you as an HR professional than just being polite. Think of the old phrase "Iron hand in a velvet glove"... which is pretty much what diplomacy is about in today's world. :)

By the way, I personally don't consider your email as stern. I have written (and seen) more stricter documents than what you have given them. :twisted:

All the best.


From India, Mumbai

Dear Ryan,
am so glad to read ur mail once again. if u remember u'd helped me out recently for a trng concern. I appreciate all ur help.
ur mail gives me a sense of relief since u cud actually perceive rather than c things. thanks u so much 4 lending me an ear and makin me fel gud.
in future if u wud've any concerns or help just shout. i mean it friend.
chow, kavita,

From India, Pune

Dear Ryan,
need anthr help. i hope u don't find me irritating. this is 'coz am not that gud when it comes to drafting formal letters at times.
Would u mind to help me draft a formal mail to the hr mngr since i most of the times work on sat & sun which are weekly offs at my org. but 'coz of certain quality checkings i've to be here on those days.
i don't need a comp off since i can't afford 2 stay away 4rm wrk.
rather i would like to ask for paying me for these two days.
the no. of hrs i work depends upon the workload.
eagerly lukin forward 2 ur reply.

From India, Pune
Hi kavitha,
The written communication needs to be more diplomatic coz, employees find it offensive when the discomfort is put on email or any other written mode.
The message could be sent in a positive way Ex.
There was a client interfacing skills training scheduled on ___ at __
Unfortunately, the participants were busy in their own activities. It will be nice if Trg dept is intimated in advance about the non - participation so that the same can be rescheduled to any other mutually convenient date.
Thanking you and assuring you of support.
This will show that the trg dept is ready to help them in rescheduling the event.

From India, Bangalore

Hi Kavita
Sorry for the delay in responding to your email.
I cannot help but feel that you are making a mistake in not taking a compensatory off. Please remember that your body also needs to recharge, no matter how light your workload may be during the week. You are not indispensable to the organization. There is no such thing as "I cannot afford to stay away from work". What if you had an illness which required bed rest? Please understand that you are also required by law to have a day off. Hey, even God rested. :lol:
I am assuming here that you are unmarried, and therefore with time on your hands. Once you are married, you need all the time you can get to balance work and home.
Drafting the letter is a minor issue in comparison to your health. Most organizations generally have a policy about entitlements when working late or working over weekends. Please check this with your finance team.
The next time you will seriously need time off, you may not be able to get it.

From India, Mumbai
hi kavita,,,,
well to mention i like ur name very much bcoz it's of my dearest professor too....
i went thru ur mail , it's fine , if somebody says to you something about this just tell them ,trainings are a cost to company , and company is not a fool to organize the trngs and pay you for attending the same, u need to understand it's important , if your bosses say anything take the good advises and leave the bad one........
being in HR u need to learn one more thing how to say a thing in 10 different ways , u dont know who understands which one.
cool down dear , no need to worry, everyone has a grudge against hr.
amit kudale

Punjlloyd ltd

From India, Gurgaon
Thanks Giridhar!
I'll bear this in mind next time.
After having read your sample mail I think i cud've been a little more diplomatic. i wish if I cud've got this before.
No repentance. It'll be a lesson rather. 8)
Thanks again!

From India, Pune

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