dear shekhar where are you from ,since you mentioned telgu i assume hyd if so u can contact me since ur a fellow citehrian consider dont let any aprehensions deter u take care
From India, Hyderabad
45From India, Hyderabad
Your problem is not unique. Welcome to the Human Race. There are Many who undergo this. I must congratulate you on accepting it and also willing to change it.
It can be changed. I am a Clinical hypnotherapist. It is a field which is like but may be a little beyond usual psychiatry.
For knowing about hypnotherapy, read FAQs on my website .:: Jeevan Maggic ::.
You need a proper therapy for this and it can be healed. Pl. locate a qualified Hypnotherapist near your place or you may email to me directly also on
. We will find the way out.
Take care. You are one among the many. Have confidence that you will be completely all right. God bless you !
From India, Ahmadabad
It can be changed. I am a Clinical hypnotherapist. It is a field which is like but may be a little beyond usual psychiatry.
For knowing about hypnotherapy, read FAQs on my website .:: Jeevan Maggic ::.
You need a proper therapy for this and it can be healed. Pl. locate a qualified Hypnotherapist near your place or you may email to me directly also on
Take care. You are one among the many. Have confidence that you will be completely all right. God bless you !
From India, Ahmadabad
Shri Shekhar,
your journey into self-exploration has begun while posting your personal issue here unloading yourself with trust in others and seeking constructive help for your consideration which shows your inner courage and willingness to overcome the hidden issues.
you mentioned telugu medium to which you perhaps attach an inferior meaning in terms of the cultural identity crisis, may be you come from a humble family or interior andhra culture where perhaps your family members do not prefer to speak english or other indian languagues like hindi, etc perhaps - shake the self-bias towards the telugu identity and feel for yourself the greatness of the andhra history and culture and it's achievements and contribution to the nation including the great andhra leaders.
may be you consider yourself straightforward and honest not conducive to political cultures - be yourself and use this as your strength and speak the way you feel about things politely without hurting or disturbing people making your point with a sense of honesty generating genuine debate without any sense of gaining or losing any points for yourself with an open mind. be aware of your other personal strengths in terms of qualifications, intelligence, etc without arrogance and false pride.
seems you are obsessed with your sense of identity disturbing your sleep and thinking all the while while driving too wondering how you would cope with the issues of the day co-ordinating with the people around and feeling smart and successful like others and afraid others could overpour you - identify the issues before you start, note your points of view, decide whom you will consult or take help from and forget while driving enjoying the drive trusting people around you and faith in God learning to take things as they unfold rather than with a predestined expectation of what should happen or not happen and learning to deal with things as they happen applying your strengths and with the available resources around you. note down the agenda for the next day before you sleep and leave this on the piece of paper/diary and just go to sleep without ploughing back the mind on the agenda again and again trusting your mind that it has the capacity to cope up the next day, practice and things could improve day by day.
do not be too soft with yourself or feel sorry for yourself for anything which is part of your personality build-up over the years nagging you in the mind, nor blame any event or person for your state of affairs, peel of any reasons that make you feel inferior or non-confident or acknowledge the reasons rationally without self-sympathy. go back to the root causes of why you think you are the way you are, having done the analysis and discovered yourself leave the reasons there just being aware but not subconciously obsessed.
share your issues with family members, friends, relatives, colleagues you can fairy trust and enable them to help you to understand your problem and the possible alternatives available to deal effectively with the inner issues.
have a role model with a humble background who has risen above being a self-made leader of the self and leader of the people historical or alive and see how they handle their issues or speak to others or in public.
be a successful software professional being hard with yourself with self-confidence, learn the knowledge and skills that will make you more confident including successful inter-personal and personal effectiveness skills. may read simple books with relevant tips.
in case working with people around is indeed difficult choose a job where you can work more individually with minimum possible public interaction - if that is so without regretting for yourself, where you can be your own master - a designer, research person, professor/teacher, trainer where you can feel the power within while dealing with people from a position of personal merit unfolding your expertise rather than depending much on co-ordination with others.
hope the above tips would make some meaning for you and would be handy in helping yourself - if need be visit a psychologist or take help from your trusted hr friend/trainer if possible. feel proud of yourself and your culture and language and humble background if so taking this as a take off point rather than a source of personal agony - sing a bold telugu song for yourself.
ham honge kaamyaab ek din!
we shall overcome some day!
with congrats for this thread, thanks for allowing me to share my unfolding thoughts, and with best wishes for your personal success in life at all fronts at home, work, society while feeling good about yourself all the time - please acknowledge!
regards,
kshantaram
From India, Ahmadabad
your journey into self-exploration has begun while posting your personal issue here unloading yourself with trust in others and seeking constructive help for your consideration which shows your inner courage and willingness to overcome the hidden issues.
you mentioned telugu medium to which you perhaps attach an inferior meaning in terms of the cultural identity crisis, may be you come from a humble family or interior andhra culture where perhaps your family members do not prefer to speak english or other indian languagues like hindi, etc perhaps - shake the self-bias towards the telugu identity and feel for yourself the greatness of the andhra history and culture and it's achievements and contribution to the nation including the great andhra leaders.
may be you consider yourself straightforward and honest not conducive to political cultures - be yourself and use this as your strength and speak the way you feel about things politely without hurting or disturbing people making your point with a sense of honesty generating genuine debate without any sense of gaining or losing any points for yourself with an open mind. be aware of your other personal strengths in terms of qualifications, intelligence, etc without arrogance and false pride.
seems you are obsessed with your sense of identity disturbing your sleep and thinking all the while while driving too wondering how you would cope with the issues of the day co-ordinating with the people around and feeling smart and successful like others and afraid others could overpour you - identify the issues before you start, note your points of view, decide whom you will consult or take help from and forget while driving enjoying the drive trusting people around you and faith in God learning to take things as they unfold rather than with a predestined expectation of what should happen or not happen and learning to deal with things as they happen applying your strengths and with the available resources around you. note down the agenda for the next day before you sleep and leave this on the piece of paper/diary and just go to sleep without ploughing back the mind on the agenda again and again trusting your mind that it has the capacity to cope up the next day, practice and things could improve day by day.
do not be too soft with yourself or feel sorry for yourself for anything which is part of your personality build-up over the years nagging you in the mind, nor blame any event or person for your state of affairs, peel of any reasons that make you feel inferior or non-confident or acknowledge the reasons rationally without self-sympathy. go back to the root causes of why you think you are the way you are, having done the analysis and discovered yourself leave the reasons there just being aware but not subconciously obsessed.
share your issues with family members, friends, relatives, colleagues you can fairy trust and enable them to help you to understand your problem and the possible alternatives available to deal effectively with the inner issues.
have a role model with a humble background who has risen above being a self-made leader of the self and leader of the people historical or alive and see how they handle their issues or speak to others or in public.
be a successful software professional being hard with yourself with self-confidence, learn the knowledge and skills that will make you more confident including successful inter-personal and personal effectiveness skills. may read simple books with relevant tips.
in case working with people around is indeed difficult choose a job where you can work more individually with minimum possible public interaction - if that is so without regretting for yourself, where you can be your own master - a designer, research person, professor/teacher, trainer where you can feel the power within while dealing with people from a position of personal merit unfolding your expertise rather than depending much on co-ordination with others.
hope the above tips would make some meaning for you and would be handy in helping yourself - if need be visit a psychologist or take help from your trusted hr friend/trainer if possible. feel proud of yourself and your culture and language and humble background if so taking this as a take off point rather than a source of personal agony - sing a bold telugu song for yourself.
ham honge kaamyaab ek din!
we shall overcome some day!
with congrats for this thread, thanks for allowing me to share my unfolding thoughts, and with best wishes for your personal success in life at all fronts at home, work, society while feeling good about yourself all the time - please acknowledge!
regards,
kshantaram
From India, Ahmadabad
Even I have gone through such phase. Now I stand tall and confident. An extream shy and weak person converted in to strong motivator and a trainer.
Your problem is not a big problem. it can be solved easily. You suffer from inferiority complex and low self esteem.
To get rid of this, you need to do 2 exercises. Goal Setting, SWOT Analysis. Also run a Johari Window on you. Enroll in a Public Speaking class or Toastmasters Club. Part of your problem is due to Telugu medium studies and environment around you. Believe me, for all your problems originally you are NOT responsible, but now you have to take it on you.
You do not need a Psychiatrist at this level.
Now let me tell you some strong positive points in you, which you have been ignoring as if they are not there.
1. You are writing this in a public forum. This needs a lot of courage. So inside you is a courageous person.
2. you are a progress oriented person and ready to embrass change. Not many people have this quality.
3. You are very good in your domain of technical knowledge.
4. You are a good observer and listener.
5. At heart, you are a nice, honest person, who wants others welfare. You will not cheat others for your small gains.
6. You speak truth.
7. Your nervousness is your greatest asset. Learn to use it for positive purpose. When you are nervous, there is extra ordinary energy in your body and your mind is alert. Thats useful for do important tasks. That means you are capable of taking higher responsibilities.
8. To some extent, every one goes through this. They hide. You don't because you are honest.
STOP worrying. START communicating with people. Give them your knowledge. You have a lot of it in you. Help people as much as you can even before they ask for it. Very soon, you will be surrounded by friends.
Good Luck to you.
and yes, finally when you achieve success, please remember friends like me.
From India, Mumbai
Your problem is not a big problem. it can be solved easily. You suffer from inferiority complex and low self esteem.
To get rid of this, you need to do 2 exercises. Goal Setting, SWOT Analysis. Also run a Johari Window on you. Enroll in a Public Speaking class or Toastmasters Club. Part of your problem is due to Telugu medium studies and environment around you. Believe me, for all your problems originally you are NOT responsible, but now you have to take it on you.
You do not need a Psychiatrist at this level.
Now let me tell you some strong positive points in you, which you have been ignoring as if they are not there.
1. You are writing this in a public forum. This needs a lot of courage. So inside you is a courageous person.
2. you are a progress oriented person and ready to embrass change. Not many people have this quality.
3. You are very good in your domain of technical knowledge.
4. You are a good observer and listener.
5. At heart, you are a nice, honest person, who wants others welfare. You will not cheat others for your small gains.
6. You speak truth.
7. Your nervousness is your greatest asset. Learn to use it for positive purpose. When you are nervous, there is extra ordinary energy in your body and your mind is alert. Thats useful for do important tasks. That means you are capable of taking higher responsibilities.
8. To some extent, every one goes through this. They hide. You don't because you are honest.
STOP worrying. START communicating with people. Give them your knowledge. You have a lot of it in you. Help people as much as you can even before they ask for it. Very soon, you will be surrounded by friends.
Good Luck to you.
and yes, finally when you achieve success, please remember friends like me.
From India, Mumbai
Dear Sekhar,
In addition to my previous suggestion, in order to identify your problem, you may perhaps like to read a set of articles, as in the attached document. The articles relate to fears, anxieties and phobias a person normally faces. All relevant references, sources and links have been provided along with each article, if you want to go through original articles at the respective sites.
This may perhaps help you to know what actually is the real problem that you should get proper remedy for.
P S Dhingra
Vigilance & Management Consultant
Dhingra Consultancy Group
New Delhi
From India, Delhi
In addition to my previous suggestion, in order to identify your problem, you may perhaps like to read a set of articles, as in the attached document. The articles relate to fears, anxieties and phobias a person normally faces. All relevant references, sources and links have been provided along with each article, if you want to go through original articles at the respective sites.
This may perhaps help you to know what actually is the real problem that you should get proper remedy for.
P S Dhingra
Vigilance & Management Consultant
Dhingra Consultancy Group
New Delhi
From India, Delhi
hi....dont worry...firstly its not an uncommon thing. I can see that you have been given some good advice. i would like to add saying that self-affirmation is a great technique to overcome any fear. Before speaking, just tell your self positive things like i enjoy speaking to others, i am a confident person and practice before a mirror before every public speech........all the best
From India, Pune
From India, Pune
You need constant mentoring and not mere tips. I also had similar problem in my school and college days. No tips and advise helped me however good it sounded. Then one fine day i met someone who made me work on it and led me by example.
we can discuss further if you are really interested to work on it...
Biswabhushan Behera
9829989064
From India, Delhi
we can discuss further if you are really interested to work on it...
Biswabhushan Behera
9829989064
From India, Delhi
Dear Sekhar ,
I am a handwriting analyst by profession.
I can help you after going through your handwriting.But for that , you need to send us your handwritten samples .
Also , please go through the attached presentation.
Thought is supreme......
Be positive ..............
Please go through sites like robinsharma.com.............
Regards,
Sheel
Handwriting Analyst
9833589787
From India, Kalyan
I am a handwriting analyst by profession.
I can help you after going through your handwriting.But for that , you need to send us your handwritten samples .
Also , please go through the attached presentation.
Thought is supreme......
Be positive ..............
Please go through sites like robinsharma.com.............
Regards,
Sheel
Handwriting Analyst
9833589787
From India, Kalyan
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