Hi All,
I am facing a problem for which I would like to seek your advice. I have been working with an organization for the last 5 years. My boss expects immediate answers to all questions. I encounter difficulties when the queries involve defining financial terms or providing specific ratio formulas. As I work in the technology department, it is challenging for me to recall all the ratio formulas or the meanings of financial terms. Despite my efforts to study and grasp these concepts, there are instances when my response is that I need to verify or that I cannot recall.
This situation has led my boss to believe that I have trouble remembering things, which is not accurate. I can remember the tasks I am assigned, but I may struggle with codes or formulas. Consequently, my boss now cross-checks my work with my seniors because she believes I have difficulty recalling anything. I would appreciate your expert advice on how to collaborate with her effectively and reassure her that while I may find financial terms challenging, I excel in the tasks I was hired to perform.
Regards, Deepa.
From India, Mumbai
Acknowledge(0)
Amend(0)
86I am facing a problem for which I would like to seek your advice. I have been working with an organization for the last 5 years. My boss expects immediate answers to all questions. I encounter difficulties when the queries involve defining financial terms or providing specific ratio formulas. As I work in the technology department, it is challenging for me to recall all the ratio formulas or the meanings of financial terms. Despite my efforts to study and grasp these concepts, there are instances when my response is that I need to verify or that I cannot recall.
This situation has led my boss to believe that I have trouble remembering things, which is not accurate. I can remember the tasks I am assigned, but I may struggle with codes or formulas. Consequently, my boss now cross-checks my work with my seniors because she believes I have difficulty recalling anything. I would appreciate your expert advice on how to collaborate with her effectively and reassure her that while I may find financial terms challenging, I excel in the tasks I was hired to perform.
Regards, Deepa.
From India, Mumbai
Acknowledge(0)Amend(0)
Oh Deepa,
Relax. Did your boss tell you that she does not have faith in you, or have you formed your own opinion? I would term it as good that she is checking with your Senior and double-checking. This would give her confidence in having faith in you going ahead. Also, why are you worrying if she is checking/double-checking? Let her do her job, what she has to do, and you continue doing your job as always.
There is nothing wrong in not knowing something, but of course, it's morally wrong to pretend that you know everything and one day fall on your image. On that count, you are doing well. Continue to do what you are doing and keep tabs on what codes/financial terms your boss frequently requires and do some research on them, just in case you can use them at the right time to impress her.
All the best.
Ukmitra
From Saudi Arabia, Riyadh
Acknowledge(0)Amend(0)
Relax. Did your boss tell you that she does not have faith in you, or have you formed your own opinion? I would term it as good that she is checking with your Senior and double-checking. This would give her confidence in having faith in you going ahead. Also, why are you worrying if she is checking/double-checking? Let her do her job, what she has to do, and you continue doing your job as always.
There is nothing wrong in not knowing something, but of course, it's morally wrong to pretend that you know everything and one day fall on your image. On that count, you are doing well. Continue to do what you are doing and keep tabs on what codes/financial terms your boss frequently requires and do some research on them, just in case you can use them at the right time to impress her.
All the best.
Ukmitra
From Saudi Arabia, Riyadh
Acknowledge(0)Amend(0)
Thank you Ukmitra and Manish for your encouraging words.
Ukmitra - Double-checking with my seniors is okay once, twice, thrice. But it has become her habit of late. And her way is not calling in the cabin and discussing. Instead, her way is to shout from the cabin and ask my seniors whether I am right or not. My seniors usually come to her cabin, understand what she is asking, and give their opinion, which is always in my support.
The problem arises when she shouts from the cabin, and my entire team hears her saying, "Is Deepa right in what she is suggesting?" However, what my seniors say in her cabin, nobody hears. This has resulted in a few of my team members who report directly to me not believing me and going their own way in doing things. Sometimes, they run into problems, and when they come in contact with my boss, they usually say, "Deepa has not taught us this, which is why the mistake happened. Maybe she forgot to tell us that important point, resulting in this." Isn't this wrong?
From India, Mumbai
Acknowledge(0)Amend(0)
Ukmitra - Double-checking with my seniors is okay once, twice, thrice. But it has become her habit of late. And her way is not calling in the cabin and discussing. Instead, her way is to shout from the cabin and ask my seniors whether I am right or not. My seniors usually come to her cabin, understand what she is asking, and give their opinion, which is always in my support.
The problem arises when she shouts from the cabin, and my entire team hears her saying, "Is Deepa right in what she is suggesting?" However, what my seniors say in her cabin, nobody hears. This has resulted in a few of my team members who report directly to me not believing me and going their own way in doing things. Sometimes, they run into problems, and when they come in contact with my boss, they usually say, "Deepa has not taught us this, which is why the mistake happened. Maybe she forgot to tell us that important point, resulting in this." Isn't this wrong?
From India, Mumbai
Acknowledge(0)Amend(0)
Yes, it is wrong... :) I feel even your boss is very insecure to shout like that :) I am sure even she might be creating an opinion of herself unconsciously in others' minds. So don't worry.
As rightly said in one of the articles on citehr by an expert, "When it rains, you need to protect yourself. We can't blame the rain for not informing me before pouring." So you need to combat these attacks if you are feeling hurt. I would have just ignored this and impressed upon my colleagues that "finally, she (Boss) agreed to what I have to say."
So my suggestion is, go out and take it ahead with your boss smartly. Next time she shouts, you shout back in a low tone, of course... "Ma'am, do you want me to explain that to you again?" and rush in with your Senior in her cabin and stand there... :) Funny, but that's how I used to deal with my ex-GM.
All the best, I hope I am making sense. UKmitra
From Saudi Arabia, Riyadh
Acknowledge(0)Amend(0)
As rightly said in one of the articles on citehr by an expert, "When it rains, you need to protect yourself. We can't blame the rain for not informing me before pouring." So you need to combat these attacks if you are feeling hurt. I would have just ignored this and impressed upon my colleagues that "finally, she (Boss) agreed to what I have to say."
So my suggestion is, go out and take it ahead with your boss smartly. Next time she shouts, you shout back in a low tone, of course... "Ma'am, do you want me to explain that to you again?" and rush in with your Senior in her cabin and stand there... :) Funny, but that's how I used to deal with my ex-GM.
All the best, I hope I am making sense. UKmitra
From Saudi Arabia, Riyadh
Acknowledge(0)Amend(0)
Dear Deepa,
Please refer to the following links for information:
- Wikipedia
- Welcome to Investopedia.com
- Homepage | Reference.com
You will find all the information there.
To remember things, whatever information you send to your boss, keep a record of it. Read it over and over again. Write down "financial" ten times so that you won't forget them.
You may think what I am telling you is ridiculous, but to survive under a difficult boss, you need to do that.
Ok...
Dinesh V Divekar
From India, Bangalore
Acknowledge(0)Amend(0)
Please refer to the following links for information:
- Wikipedia
- Welcome to Investopedia.com
- Homepage | Reference.com
You will find all the information there.
To remember things, whatever information you send to your boss, keep a record of it. Read it over and over again. Write down "financial" ten times so that you won't forget them.
You may think what I am telling you is ridiculous, but to survive under a difficult boss, you need to do that.
Ok...
Dinesh V Divekar
From India, Bangalore
Acknowledge(0)Amend(0)
Hi Deepa,
A difficult situation this! But then action is of importance... If I were you, I would go and sit in front of her and tell her this: "Madam, I need to share something with you. Look, I need your sincere feedback on my performance... for I need to grow, and that would happen if I can learn from your experience... for some time now I feel you are not trusting me, and that's making me lose confidence in myself. Can you help me to regain it? I think whenever there is a query, if you call me directly or along with my senior, it would help me learn better and also grow. I am keen to learn, Madam, and need your support and help... Will you please help me and encourage me." See Deepa, I would be polite but yet assertive... not aggressive... many a time we are not able to understand the difference... expressing your feelings honestly... That's it... Act... don't react... This conversation could be your umbrella as Mr. UKMitra has rightly mentioned.
From India, Pune
Acknowledge(0)Amend(0)
A difficult situation this! But then action is of importance... If I were you, I would go and sit in front of her and tell her this: "Madam, I need to share something with you. Look, I need your sincere feedback on my performance... for I need to grow, and that would happen if I can learn from your experience... for some time now I feel you are not trusting me, and that's making me lose confidence in myself. Can you help me to regain it? I think whenever there is a query, if you call me directly or along with my senior, it would help me learn better and also grow. I am keen to learn, Madam, and need your support and help... Will you please help me and encourage me." See Deepa, I would be polite but yet assertive... not aggressive... many a time we are not able to understand the difference... expressing your feelings honestly... That's it... Act... don't react... This conversation could be your umbrella as Mr. UKMitra has rightly mentioned.
From India, Pune
Acknowledge(0)Amend(0)
Deepa,
There are two things I would do if I were in your shoes.
1. Managing up - Have a private conversation with your manager. Make it clear to her that her open behavior is affecting your credibility. Mention that she has every right to verify your work with your seniors. However, the method chosen by her is negatively affecting your credibility. Therefore, suggest to her that she verify with her seniors privately. While having this conversation, do not make any personal attacks (such as "you are like this, or like that, or you always do this or that"). Keep things objective and question her actions, not her! (your action of verifying things in such a loud manner is hitting my credibility with my staff). Do not, in any way, question her authority. No manager likes that. Respect her authority and her, and ask her to respect yours. That is a fair request.
2. Managing down - Have a team meeting. Clearly communicate to your direct reports that they take direction from you. They cannot act on their own. While being independent in one's job is an asset, it must align with the general direction set by the manager. In any event, they must own up to their actions, and it is your job to hold them accountable. If your direct reports are not following that direction, again, it's your job to bring them in line.
All the best,
-Som G
From United States, Woodinville
Acknowledge(0)Amend(0)
There are two things I would do if I were in your shoes.
1. Managing up - Have a private conversation with your manager. Make it clear to her that her open behavior is affecting your credibility. Mention that she has every right to verify your work with your seniors. However, the method chosen by her is negatively affecting your credibility. Therefore, suggest to her that she verify with her seniors privately. While having this conversation, do not make any personal attacks (such as "you are like this, or like that, or you always do this or that"). Keep things objective and question her actions, not her! (your action of verifying things in such a loud manner is hitting my credibility with my staff). Do not, in any way, question her authority. No manager likes that. Respect her authority and her, and ask her to respect yours. That is a fair request.
2. Managing down - Have a team meeting. Clearly communicate to your direct reports that they take direction from you. They cannot act on their own. While being independent in one's job is an asset, it must align with the general direction set by the manager. In any event, they must own up to their actions, and it is your job to hold them accountable. If your direct reports are not following that direction, again, it's your job to bring them in line.
All the best,
-Som G
From United States, Woodinville
Acknowledge(0)Amend(0)
UKmitra,
I respectfully disagree with your suggestion of shouting back at the manager in the equal tone. That amounts to questioning your manager's authority, and there would be no difference between an unprofessional/unthinking manager and a subordinate. It would make matters worse, not improve. Think about it. If your direct reports do that to you (even if you did that to them), you wouldn't like it. No manager would.
Instead, have a private conversation with the manager to bring her in line. As long as Deepa's tone is firm and respectful, I strongly believe her manager will realize her mistakes and make a sincere attempt to correct them.
If things don't improve after that, the question Deepa must ask herself is, is it really worth working for such an unprofessional manager?
Regards,
-Som G
From United States, Woodinville
Acknowledge(0)Amend(0)
I respectfully disagree with your suggestion of shouting back at the manager in the equal tone. That amounts to questioning your manager's authority, and there would be no difference between an unprofessional/unthinking manager and a subordinate. It would make matters worse, not improve. Think about it. If your direct reports do that to you (even if you did that to them), you wouldn't like it. No manager would.
Instead, have a private conversation with the manager to bring her in line. As long as Deepa's tone is firm and respectful, I strongly believe her manager will realize her mistakes and make a sincere attempt to correct them.
If things don't improve after that, the question Deepa must ask herself is, is it really worth working for such an unprofessional manager?
Regards,
-Som G
From United States, Woodinville
Acknowledge(0)Amend(0)
Hey Som,
Thanks for your comments. I agree with you totally. Probably I have chosen the wrong word of expression. What I meant was "confer with her", like we usually do when we sit around with colleagues and discuss matters.
Regards,
UKmitra
From Saudi Arabia, Riyadh
Acknowledge(0)Amend(0)
Thanks for your comments. I agree with you totally. Probably I have chosen the wrong word of expression. What I meant was "confer with her", like we usually do when we sit around with colleagues and discuss matters.
Regards,
UKmitra
From Saudi Arabia, Riyadh
Acknowledge(0)Amend(0)
Hello Deepa,
The above contributors have given you sound advice. Also, see Bad to the Bone: Dealing With a Bad Boss or Bad Managers for some tips on managing a bad boss. http://karenfriedman.com <link updated to site home> Tip Diva | Top Ten Tips - Dealing With A Difficult Boss All found at tips for dealing with a difficult boss - Google Search
Best wishes,
Simhan
A retired academic in the UK
From United Kingdom
Acknowledge(0)Amend(0)
The above contributors have given you sound advice. Also, see Bad to the Bone: Dealing With a Bad Boss or Bad Managers for some tips on managing a bad boss. http://karenfriedman.com <link updated to site home> Tip Diva | Top Ten Tips - Dealing With A Difficult Boss All found at tips for dealing with a difficult boss - Google Search
Best wishes,
Simhan
A retired academic in the UK
From United Kingdom
Acknowledge(0)Amend(0)Join Our Community and get connected with the right people who can help. Our AI-powered platform provides real-time fact-checking, peer-reviewed insights, and a vast historical knowledge base to support your search.
Tips to Maintain a Good Relationship with your Boss.ppt
Dealing with Bad Boss.doc