Navigating Office Crushes: Should You Tell HR If You Fall for a Coworker?

Hi,

Infatuation in the workplace: Is it against policies?

If one has infatuation in the office, is it against policies? Is infatuation not allowed at any cost? What if someone falls in love with someone in the office? Should it be disclosed to management/HR?

Understanding infatuation and workplace dynamics

If someone has a crush on somebody and gets a gentle smile when taking someone's name or sees someone, will it be considered infatuation? If someone reads our facial emotion and determines whether someone is in love, is it infatuation?

Dear member,

The replies to your questions are as below:

If one has infatuation in the office, is it against policies?

Answer: No

Is infatuation not allowed at any cost? What if someone really falls in love with someone in the office, should it be disclosed to management/HR?

Answer: No need to disclose it to HR or management

If someone has a crush on somebody and gets a gentle smile when taking someone's name or seeing someone, will it be considered infatuation?

Answer: Not necessarily

If someone reads our facial emotion and determines whether someone is in love, is it infatuation?

Answer: No

Comments on the Post: Well, gentlemen, love blooms at the workplace and it is blooming all over the world. Love is not blind per se, but when Cupid's arrow hits the pair, it makes them blind! But then, out of blindness, the lovers' activities should not impact their work or the work environment itself. However, smitten by love, either or both members of the pair need to maintain a discreet distance. Out of the workplace, they are free to express their love. In public places also, whether to display affection or maintain distance is the pair's call.

Coming to workplace activities. The employees are paid for their performance. They are also paid for coming up with innovative ideas to satisfy the customers, reduce some costs, or reduce the turnaround time of some processes. But then this can best be achieved if the employee devotes wholeheartedly to the duties. The employee is expected to think about the well-being of the company every minute. Otherwise, the employee may think of acquiring new skills to elevate his/her performance. Far from doing this, if an employee engages in amorousness, it could distract him/her, and the distraction could result in more errors. Over a period of time, it could distract others also. Sorting out those errors could be costly. True love remains within the frame of obligations and does not break the frame. Either the puerility or prurience breaks this frame. Whether it is true love or a prurience camouflaged as love, the pair would know the best!

Thanks,

Dinesh Divekar

Hi, in a nutshell, as long as personal affairs are maintained within the limits and decorum is kept at the office, nothing is wrong.

Hi, Falling in love with a colleague does not constitute misconduct. Your feelings should not be one-sided. Both of you should refrain from engaging in any activities that violate official decorum. Sometimes, jealous colleagues may stir up trouble in the office, so do not give them the opportunity to create issues. If both of you have plans for marriage in the future, you can disclose the relationship to the HR Head or your Head of Department. Love may be blind, so navigate potential challenges wisely.

Well, I'm afraid you might be experiencing an anxiety disorder, if I'm not mistaken. I'm not sure if the girl you are "seeing" has given you any approval in response to your "feelings." It seems like you have not expressed your feelings towards her. You have not shared much about yourself, and you don't seem to know much about her either. Currently, it seems to be at a stage where she has smiled at you a few times. This is a common occurrence for many people, I'm sure. Perhaps she has smiled at almost all her colleagues, including you. It's important not to rush things. Nowadays, girls are quite discerning when it comes to choosing their life partners. I don't know if you are on her "shortlist" of potential partners. Ultimately, it is your private matter, and it's not for anyone to pass judgment on. However, I suspect you are early in your career. It would be best not to hastily jeopardize your career. Give it some more time. You will eventually learn each other's preferences. When the time is right, you can consider expressing your feelings to her. In the meantime, focus on your career. Who knows, you might meet someone even better than the current "she" in due time. You described it as "infatuation" rather than "fond love," which is not necessarily permanent. Currently, you are not obligated to discuss this "affair" with HR unless there are noticeable changes in your behavior at work. As long as you maintain professionalism in the office environment, there is no need to involve HR. I apologize if my words seemed a bit harsh or inappropriate.