Feeling Stuck in My New HR Role After Relocating for Family: How Can I Stay Motivated?

Dear All,

I am a female HR professional who worked in an MNC in Bangalore for the past few years. I am married and was staying alone in Bangalore, while my spouse and kids were staying in my native Tamilnadu. Recently, due to family commitments and to take care of my kids, I relocated back to my native place. I have secured an HR job in my hometown, but for a much lower salary compared to my previous position.

Although I understand the necessity of being with my kids now, I have been feeling quite down lately. Initially, I didn't notice much difference as the job profile remained the same, and I anticipated a successful career continuation. However, after working here for 2 months, I am finding that things are not going as smoothly as I had hoped.

Challenges in the New Role

The organization I am now part of has around 200 employees, and all decisions are made by the Owner. While the Owner has granted me some autonomy to implement my ideas, I find myself constantly waiting for approval on even minor matters, which can be time-consuming.

Concerns About Skill Stagnation

I am concerned that my skills may stagnate in this environment. Despite making a conscious choice to prioritize my family, I understand that my current role may offer limited opportunities for HR-related activities. I would appreciate any suggestions on how to stay engaged and self-motivated in my current situation.

Your assistance and advice would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you.

Dear member,

Life is all about choosing an option from two or more. Life is also about making trade-offs. Between career and family commitments, you have chosen the latter. In that case, why look back and start comparing with the other option?

Bangalore: A Dynamic City

Bangalore is a dynamic city. A city like Bangalore is always characterized by action, forcefulness, or ambition. Whose ambition it is, whether of the owner or of the employees, it is the driving factor behind the growth. In contrast, in small towns, this strong urge is missing. Therefore, the comparison between the two is unfair.

Choosing Family Over Career

Secondly, you had an option to bring your kids to Bangalore, but you have chosen to raise them in your native place as you wish to see them rooted in your culture. So, why grumble now?

Balancing Career and Motherhood

You are handling two roles - one as a career woman and another as a mother. Between the two, obviously, the latter role is far more challenging. Grooming children is not an easy task. It is said that "nations rest on the shoulders of the mother." Therefore, even by staying in a smaller town, if you are able to refine the behavior of your children, it is going to be your success and not someone else's.

Autonomy in the Job

Regarding autonomy in the job, a large number of business owners, even from a big city like Bangalore, do not empower their managers. The centralized administrative style remains the hallmark of Indian businesses. The company in which you worked in Bangalore could be an exception.

Anyway, we cannot undo the past. Therefore, move on without regrets. A sense of regret could demotivate you, and it could have a bearing on your family life too!

Thanks,

Dinesh Divekar

Dear Colleague,

Very well guided by the colleague in his reply to your query. To add:

Balancing Family and Career for Women

This is the general scenario for career-aspirant women in most cases. They have to compromise on a lot of things for both family and career, which are interdependent. A successful woman is one who can balance both well and succeed in both areas. Having a very good career but poor family success, or vice versa, are both equally incorrect.

Adapting to Different Locations

Bangalore and Mettupalayam are completely incomparable, but it shows your adaptability. This is a critical time for you to raise your children, and the conscious decision you have made will prove beneficial for your family's well-being in the long run. Once your children move on to college, you can consider moving back to Bangalore or any other metro city to continue your career momentum. However, the reverse is not currently feasible. Therefore, your decision is commendable, and we all salute your commitment to your family.

Corporate Culture and Professional Growth

Regarding the role you are currently in, I would like to inform you that your present portfolio is similar to many big corporate companies where the promoter allows very little space for you to work, regardless of their location in Mumbai, Delhi, Hyderabad, or Bangalore. You are now experiencing a good corporate culture, which is a typical situation in many Indian corporations. I have encountered such tenures in at least three companies during my corporate career, which greatly helped me in my later career. This experience will be valuable for your future corporate endeavors. Once you establish confidence with the promoters, you will become a successful professional in such companies, unlike larger companies where access to promoters is limited due to multiple layers of hierarchy.

Above all, stay focused on your decisions and strive to be successful in both your family and professional life.

As famously stated in the Tamil life guide Thirukkural, "Think and dare a proper deed. Dare and think is bad in need."

Consider, then undertake a matter; it is folly to say "We will consider" after having already undertaken it.

Keep moving forward, and your time for professional growth will come. We appreciate your good insight and clear decision-making that align with both aspects of your life - family and profession. God bless you for all the good in your life and career.

When you decided to leave your job in Bangalore and move to your hometown to be with your kids and husband, it was a conscious decision to accept a job with a lower salary in your hometown. So, what is the point of regretting it now? Give your best to your present job, be happy, and make the most of the opportunity you have to be with your family. Look at things from the perspective of a better tomorrow; this is not the end of it. Who knows, this job may bring better career opportunities in the future, here or elsewhere. Have faith in God's grace, as your sincere and honest efforts are bound to bring equal or better returns. The law of action and reaction is always at play.

Regards,

Vinayak Nagarkar HR and Employee Relations Consultant