Feeling Stuck in a Toxic HR Role: How Can I Resign Without Burning Bridges?

I want to resign from my company due to a very toxic work culture and lack of respect from my boss. I work in HR and have daily interactions with my boss, who is also the director of the company. He does not value any suggestions I give, and there is a lack of transparency within HR regarding employee and organization-related matters. I want to leave, but I am afraid of what reason to give. If I provide the true reason, he might negatively impact my career by refusing to provide a relieving letter and giving a negative reference during background checks. I need some expert suggestions on how to handle this situation.

Kalpana, do not worry at all and calm down. You seem to be fearing things a lot—shed these fears and be bold.

Practical thoughts:

1. Do not resign until you have an active job offer in hand.
2. If you think that your suggestions are not valued in the organization, simply do not speak in the meetings. Better stick to the agenda and questions.
3. Never be a part of office grapevine.
4. A relieving letter is your legal right, and an aggrieved employee can always sue them in a Court of Law for the denied documentation.
5. Negative reference checks are not valued or are simply ignored by an effective organization. Do not fear anything, as reference checks will always be vetted through HR. Companies allowing negative reference checks are always running the risk of reputation loss in the market and may definitely not attract good talent due to such unfriendly HR policies.

Do not worry and stand up for yourself.

Hello Kalpana, the situation seems tricky. I understand anyone would think the way you are thinking now, but hold on!

Understanding your boss's perspective

Try to understand your boss's side. What are his expectations from HR? Where does he think HR can contribute (or doesn't invite HR's contribution) to the organization? Knowing his expectations will help you redirect your efforts.

Irrespective of how you feel, this is the practical world. Every day we hear about people who have lost jobs due to COVID-19 or are working on half salary to make a living. Under these circumstances, if the pay package and position are good, wait until you get an equally good offer. Focus on your career, work on what you are expected to deliver, and upskill yourself simultaneously. Your time will come.

Avoiding hasty decisions

Don't make any decisions hurriedly, especially when you are emotionally upset.

Besides, work on the valid suggestions given by Ms. Lekha above.

I am not commenting on the relieving aspect as I really think you should rethink your decision. All the best.