Feeling Helpless After Being Yelled At by Managers – How Should I Respond?

Dear All, I need your help. I am working in the Regional Office of a retail company in Noida as an Executive Planning. On 8 March 2018, my HOD (not reporting manager) came with another department HOD and started abusing and shouting without listening to me. They did not call my reporting manager or HR. I still do not know why they were abusing me brutally. They made me cry. There is no work problem, so why? I am very disappointed.

What should I do?

Please advise me, help me please.

Thank you,

Anil

[Email Removed For Privacy Reasons]

Dear Anil, what has happened to you is unfortunate. Emotional outbursts by a senior have no place in the workplace as they disrupt the interpersonal environment of the company. This is the starting point of demotivation for employees. However, you need to look at the incident dispassionately and equanimously. I recommend that you write down the whole episode. Separate the senior's emotions from the incident and try to understand the underlying message.

After completing the above exercise, if you determine that you have unjustly borne the brunt of the senior's emotions, you have two options. The first is to ignore the incident and move forward, but ensure that you keep your manager informed about what occurred.

The second option is to submit an application to the VP or Director of the company regarding being the target of the senior's emotions. However, this option carries risks. Your grievance may be valid, but what if the top management supports the erring GM? Seniors often protect each other, so make this decision judiciously.

Learning for Top Leadership: The incident mentioned, where a junior employee was publicly criticized, may not be common, but such occurrences happen in many workplaces. These incidents arise because top leadership fails to educate managers and senior managers on the judicious use of their positional or legitimate power. Instead of utilizing referent power or expert power, senior managers tend to rely on positional power to compensate for the lack of these two powers. Moreover, they often overlook how such incidents tarnish the significance of the organization's vision or mission.

Thanks,
Dinesh Divekar

Analyzing the Situation

This is an outburst that was uncalled for. You need to analyze things calmly.

Questions to Consider

What is your relationship with this senior manager? Have you had any official or personal dealings with him? What exactly did he tell you? Was it a personal or office-related outburst?

Handling Unexpected Situations

One has to be mentally strong to face such unexpected situations. After a thorough mental breakdown of the incident, report it to your manager. Such incidents should not bog you down. Either ignore or take action in a forthright manner.

Dear colleague,

Such an unleashing of personal anger by the HOD, whether for a justified cause or not, disregarding its impact on the mind of the subordinate, shows a total lack of human sensitivity and professionalism. The HOD should realize how he would feel if his boss had blasted him openly like this. His unprofessional and insensitive handling of this situation merits condemnation.

This aside, I am sure the poster has given some cause for the HOD to react, which he has not stated. It is one-sided. It is his story. We need the full story. In the absence of the above, I would say that the poster should introspect and find out any deficiency on his part and try to improve. If the act of the HOD is unjustified not only in handling but also in merits, then it should be escalated to higher levels.

Regards, Vinayak Nagarkar HR Consultant

Dear Anil, the incident you mentioned is most unfortunate and not acceptable in any manner. Our law considers this type of incident as an offense of a cognizable nature.

Understanding the Incident

What made your HOD lose temper and outburst is best known to you or that person. This type of incident is also considered against the ethics of the establishment as well as misconduct. It is difficult to say anything good without hearing the opposite party too. You are well aware of the saying that 'every action has one or more causes.'

Identifying Underlying Causes

Many times, we overlook small things considering them inappropriate, but later those things remain the cause of an incident. Do not conclude that we see fault in you; rather, it may be a possibility. One suggestion is to know the cause. You may not be in a position to go and ask your HOD, but your reporting boss can do that if you have a good rapport with him. Did you discuss the issue with your reporting boss? In my opinion, your reporting boss might definitely have some ideas about the matter.

Taking Action

If you are certain that what happened had no lapse on your part and the HOD is responsible, then you can report to the top brass of your establishment and wait for their action. In this case, the opinion of Mr. Divekar is well spelled out.

Considering the Context

How long have you been associated with this firm? Is this kind of incident a regular occurrence or a lone one? It is better to wipe it off from your mind, treating it as a bad dream if it is a sole incident. Things would have been better if your establishment had any kind of staff association, which is the best platform to use for this kind of incident.

Rights and Respect

He may be the proprietor or manager; it does not matter, but he has no right to misbehave with anyone, even if one is guilty. There are various means and ways to sort out the issues.

Hi Anil,

For you, there are two things:

1. Talk to your HR in the presence of your HOD (if you have an effective HR in your organization).
Or
2. Control yourself, find an alternative, and delete the problem (Ctrl + Alt + Del).

From,
Bharat

Addressing Workplace Misconduct

Abusing and shouting at the workplace constitute grave acts of misconduct as per the service rules applicable to your establishment and hence must be reported, in writing, to the employer (your superiors/management) so that disciplinary action is taken for the said/reported acts of misconduct by way of correction as well as deterrent.

Any act like the one reported by you is unworthy of employment. The reported act of misconduct indulged in by the senior employees becomes all the more serious concern as it, inter alia, adversely affects the morale. Moreover, such acts amount to the violation of the fundamental right to life with dignity guaranteed to all by our constitution. If your work-related or workplace-related conduct was not acceptable as per the employment service rules applicable to you, disciplinary action should have been initiated rather than resorting to such reported outburst at the workplace during duty hours.

It is often rightly pointed out that "People see, people do so." Employees, particularly the senior position-holders, may ponder over the point.

Regards, Transformatix Team, Bengaluru 19.3.2018