Feeling Undervalued at Work: How Can I Earn Respect from My Co-workers as a New HR Professional?

I have been working as an HR professional for almost 6 months, but my co-workers do not respect me and treat me as a lower-ranking individual. The reasons for this are as follows:

1. I am too kind to them.
2. I lack the ability to reason effectively.
3. I have a lack of information.
4. There is a maximization of waste.
5. I do not know how to handle certain situations.

What are the things I need to improve on?

Suggestions for Overcoming Shortcomings

While you have described the situation you are in, you have not mentioned your designation, the nature of your industry, whom you report to, your qualifications, etc. You have identified your weaknesses for the situation prevailing in your company. But what about your strengths? While overcoming shortcomings, you need to leverage your strengths as well. Anyway, suggestions on overcoming your shortcomings are as below:

1. I'm too kind with them
Reply: - Don't be unnecessarily kind or strict. Knowing when to enforce stringently is a subjective decision that must be made on a case-by-case basis. Meanwhile, master assertion skills. Always ensure fairness to both individuals and the organization. Your kindness should not come at the expense of the organization's interests. Strive for the organization's well-being.

2. I don't know how to reason out
Reply: - The definition of reasoning out is "to determine or conclude something by logical thinking." Therefore, whenever you speak or write, provide adequate references to case studies, laws, acts, etc. Do not make statements without evidence. In your communication, verify the correct usage of definitions, terminologies, etc.

3. Lack of information
Reply: - Enhance your subject awareness. Preparedness is key to success. Therefore, invest your time in preparation. Additionally, when you make a mistake, record what happened and why. Consult with subject matter experts and engage in discussions on professional matters.

4. Maximization of waste
Reply: - Reduce wastefulness. Identify technological tools that can enhance productivity. Begin measuring the turnaround time of various processes. Develop analytical skills to optimize resources.

5. Do not know how to handle a situation
Reply: - Learn principles of communication along with negotiation and conflict resolution skills. Implement these skills and evaluate your performance, noting areas of strength and areas needing improvement.

Final comments: - Is there an opportunity to be mentored by a good mentor? Seek feedback and act upon it. Believe in yourself. Self-transformation is within your reach. Success equals self-belief plus efforts in the right direction.

Thanks,
Dinesh Divekar

Dear Jeany, I understand your situation. You will gain respect if you start working together with your colleague on:

1) Selected issues in which he is interested first.
2) Normally, colleagues will be busy doing things they like, so find out and ask if they need any support in resolving or improving things.
3) Acknowledge the good things he has done and give sincere appreciation.
4) He must be responsible for some activities; sit with him to support if he is struggling, or to review and praise him for the good things.

I followed all of the above steps and did not face any issues when I was new to the organization.

The essence of respect

Respect is something we all strive for. Interestingly, it doesn't come attached to any designation, post, or position—it must be earned. If you look up a dictionary, "respect" means "a feeling of deep admiration for someone or something elicited by their abilities, qualities, or achievements."

The foundation of knowledge

If you notice another aspect of the definition, you'll realize that abilities, qualities, and achievements in your profession are built on the foundation called "knowledge." In my view, the lack of knowledge is one of the basic reasons for the despairing feeling of inadequacy. However, merely having "knowledge" is not sufficient; you must learn to apply that knowledge to practical situations, thereby developing your "abilities." Successful application of your abilities gives you "achievements," and a combination of both gives you "professional qualities" that others admire. In case you are unsuccessful in applying your abilities, do not despair; it will just improve your "knowledge" and refine your "abilities."

Personal qualities

Then there is the aspect of "personal qualities": Are you trustworthy? Are you reliable? Are you a gossip-monger? How do you conduct yourself? How do you dress? What are your etiquettes? How do you talk? And so many more qualities.

Continuous improvement

Gaining knowledge is a lifelong process, and developing "abilities," "qualities," and "achievements" requires constant updates to your knowledge base and lots of hard work, persistence, and dedication. One can begin with self-awareness, for which SWOT Analysis, as Mr. Gopinath Varahamurthi has already mentioned, is a very useful tool. Self SWOT Analysis is easier said than done; one must be dispassionate about it and have the courage to do it because it can be quite revealing about oneself. But if you do it successfully, you get a clear-cut idea about how to channel your efforts towards becoming a better professional.

The importance of reading

(A word of caution about gaining knowledge: With free "data" available on the World Wide Web, including this forum and many like it, the habit of reading reference books, professional publications, etc., has completely vanished. Notwithstanding all this free advice and guidance, as Mr. Dinesh Divekar very rightly pointed out in his reply—always, always, always go back to the books, the bare acts, the case laws, read and re-read the original stuff.)

All the best.