Seeking Recommendations for Counseling to Support Employee with Behavioral Challenges

Dear Seniors,

One of my tenured employees has major behavioral issues, which make her quite rude and abrupt in her day-to-day work, causing a lot of conflicts with her co-workers. She is facing issues in her personal life, and we see its impact on her professional life.

As an organization, we would like to help her by providing counseling. Therefore, we request all of you to share or recommend a professional who can counsel her and help her to be in a better place.

Regards,
Lily D

There are two things in your post about the behavior of the employee. One is her rude behavior, and the other is being "abrupt." What do you mean by "abrupt"? Does this abruptness impact the work of her department? Is she absent from her work? Please note that behavior and indiscipline are two separate issues and should not be lumped together. A very well-disciplined person might not have good behavior, and conversely, an undisciplined person might have good behavior.

Employee Designation and Feedback

What is the designation of this employee? When did she join your company? What about her seniors? Did they give feedback to her? While they may not be expert counselors, "counseling" is one of the important supporting skills of managers.

Many employees' personal lives are in turmoil, but professionalism demands not allowing personal life to affect professional life.

Your Role and HR Involvement

What about you? What is your designation, and are you from the HR department? If yes, then did anyone from HR try counseling her? If not, then sit with her and discuss the issues arising from her behavior. If she has been groomed to be rude by her parents, then you cannot change her behavior, yet you can recommend developing interpersonal skills, questioning skills, listening skills, and skills to manage anger. In your counseling session, even if you make her acknowledge her shortcomings, that in itself will be an achievement.

Recruitment and Workplace Etiquette

Partially, it is a recruitment problem as well. Why did the interviewer not identify this major anomaly in her behavior? Partially, it could be a problem of not educating employees on workplace etiquette. Create an induction manual and include 1-2 chapters on business etiquette or workplace etiquette. Maintaining a healthy workplace environment is everyone's responsibility, and no employee, regardless of their designation, has the right to disrupt it.

You may refer the case to a professional counselor; however, it is important to specify what has been done at the company level. Who has read material on counseling skills and tried to implement them?

Anyway, in this forum, there are many consultants whose hallmark is their reticence. They may become active after reading your post and assure a magical transformation in her behavior! Please remember that no magic lasts forever! Therefore, try to handle this issue in-house.

Thanks,

Dinesh Divekar

Using Color Psychology for Employee Development

Color psychology can surely help your employees in identifying the root cause and remedial action for their existing behavior. I teach color psychology and use it as an "Empathic listening" tool. I feel it is a case of basic needs—physical/psychological needs not being met, and hence the subconscious mind is finding ways to fulfill these needs by creating drama around her. Color analysis is a very quick, easy, and reliable tool for personal and professional development.

Regards,
Sheel

Thank you, Dinesh, for your advice. I have a few things to share with you about this employee.

1) The person has been employed with the organization for over 17 years and is currently at the Assistant Manager level following the last appraisal.

2) Management is aware of her behavior and has attempted to guide her on several occasions. Due to her status as a tenured employee, she has been given considerable leeway by both the Reporting Manager and the Management, which she has taken for granted, resulting in such behavior.

3) I am currently working in the capacity of an Assistant Manager - HR and have also tried counseling her. Unfortunately, my efforts have been in vain as the person perceives everyone as her enemy and is not open to receiving help. Therefore, I am considering involving an external party who might assist her in overcoming this and help her understand the importance of professionalism.

4) Her rude behavior is negatively impacting the work environment, her coworkers, and our vendors. Unfortunately, she is not the only one displaying such behavior; there are other employees who have also adopted this attitude, creating a significant amount of negativity in the workplace.

Your second post speaks volumes. When the organization is at a rudimentary stage, getting the right people is very difficult. Neither is it possible to hire employees with high salaries. Against this backdrop, employers simply accept employees who fit within a certain salary bracket. Another aspect is rewarding the continuation of employment. More than performance, their tenure is rewarded. Only in extreme cases are employees let go due to underperformance.

In India, not many employers emphasize building the desired organizational culture. The obsession with growth and profitability often comes at the expense of culture. However, few realize that culture plays a crucial role in driving growth. With the right culture, significant growth can be achieved. Hardly any employer understands the value of the interpersonal environment within the company.

In your company, this situation may have occurred. However, you are just one among millions of other companies. Disregarding a healthy interpersonal environment is the bane of Indian companies.

Addressing the Current Situation

The need of the hour is not counseling for her, but counseling for the top boss on the importance of removing this "bad apple." "A rotten apple spoils the barrel" is not just a famous proverb; it is exactly what is happening in this case. The individual has already caused significant damage and deserves no further leniency. The fact that she was tolerated for 17 years is incomprehensible.

Issue a show-cause notice to her for some reason. Provide a warning later to correct her behavior. Repeat this process 2-3 times, and one day, give her marching orders. During all these steps, do not sign any documents on your own; let them be signed by the top boss.

Her removal will send a message to everyone and help bring them back on track. While counseling employees may seem like the right route, there is no need to waste time correcting the behavior of an intractable employee. If others are also imitating her behavior, would you want to provide counseling for all of them as well? Are we running an enterprise or a reformation center? Our primary duty is to provide maximum value to stakeholders, and this can only happen with the right people.

As mentioned in my previous post, there are consultants who will push for their services in such situations. They seek to capitalize on these issues. If counseling were truly effective in resolving workplace problems, there would be examples of successful enterprises run solely on counseling. However, no such examples exist in the market!

Thanks,

Dinesh Divekar