Feeling Stuck in My HR Career: How Do I Find the Courage to Change Jobs Again?

Reflecting on My Career Journey

Thinking of the past where I never worked with a company for more than 1-2 years. I was assertive, never afraid to change jobs. I would inform in advance that I was searching for a new job and dared to mention the resignation date also in advance. I continued with the present company for over 6 years, worked hard, kept myself always occupied, and haven't visited CiteHR since then. Today, I have good pay but no good working conditions, a good position but no motivation, a good atmosphere but it's totally political.

Facing a New Dilemma

Now, I am thinking of switching again, but where has my courage gone? These 6 years have made me go blank! I think I am a bit scared this time! I can't believe these would be my words for what? To change a job? Has anyone been in this dilemma? If so, I am asking you, how did you deal with it? Tell me and help me restore my confidence.

Regards,
Vinod Kumar. H.R

The existence of so many questions in the world clearly suggests that self-confidence is not the answer to all questions. Having written and published quite a few theories like you, I know that my problem is not really concerned with confidence versus overconfidence.

I am seeking the opinions of people who have had similar experiences or dilemmas like mine regarding changing a well-paying job due to working conditions and the political environment. After a long period of isolation, someone seeks advice and comes across a theory that seems to be designed solely based on the narrator's will and wishes.

Anyway, thank you. I will continue to pursue my own path until I receive a better response or advice.

Regards,
Vinod Kumar. H.R

First and foremost, my surname is "Divekar" and not "Divakar." Please make a note.

In fact, your first post was incoherent and also inchoate. Your perplexed state of mind was well discernible. Nevertheless, when I provided a link to a past query, the objective was to help you come out of this confused state.

However, you appeared to be so confused that you are unable to distinguish between a reply to a past post and a "theory." I have never propounded any theory as such.

Lack of Courage and Self-Confidence

In your first post, you have written, "Now thinking of switch again but... where has my courage gone? These 6 years have made me go blank!!!" This lack of courage is because of a lack of self-confidence. Lack of self-confidence is due to two things: a lack of requisite skills and a lack of career planning. In those six long years, why did you not plan for future growth? What efforts did you put in to develop yourself? If you had done that, this query would not have come up at all.

Next, in the same post, you write, "Today I have a good pay but no good working condition. Good position but no motivation. Good atmosphere but totally political."

To get something, you have to forego something. In a company where the atmosphere is apolitical, possibly you might have got less pay. Secondly, why do you require someone else or an atmosphere to motivate you? One can keep himself or herself motivated notwithstanding the unfriendly or non-conducive atmosphere around.

Seeking Opinions and Providing Information

In your second post, you have written, "I was trying to take the opinion of people who have a similar experience/dilemma like me about changing a good yielding job because of working conditions and a political environment."

How do we know what conditions have changed? What information have you provided about yourself? Have you written about your industry, your designation, your qualifications, etc.? Without this information, what is any other member expected to do? If you had made a career plan or SWOT analysis and uploaded it here, possibly you could have received better suggestions for enriching or developing it further.

Secondly, please note that this forum is for any other member like you. We are not paid consultants. Therefore, deriding a fellow member who came forward to give albeit a tad of help is hardly professional behavior.

Career Development Suggestions

As far as the career development section is concerned, I have given my suggestions to a large number of junior members. Click the following link to refer to the latest one:

https://www.citehr.com/480499-career...assistant.html

Now, whether to accept the suggestion is one's choice. Many have accepted it and benefited too. If you wish to become an exception by disregarding it, you are free to do so.

Thanks,

Dinesh V Divekar

I read your query. I saw a few responses and then yours to Dinesh, which makes me think about whether one risks doing their bit to help a cause. I must confess, the rebuttal and the tone of your response were not in good taste. Though I can't get into your mind, I will attempt to propose what I think you can do.

Listening to Your Inner Voice

I wonder if you've heard the voice within you. Everyone has one, which we listen to when we want to and choose to ignore when we do not. I believe there is a link to this: you might have thought about this early in your career, boosted by pride and an attitude of "I can," and so you did. It may also have been a life with little or no dependencies, but now things may have changed. More socially, with getting married, the arrival of children, responsibilities, etc., you find yourself on the back foot because you are unsure of what the future holds. You may also be in a dilemma.

An Analogy from Cricket

Let me give you an analogy: I hope you follow cricket. Let's take the case of Sehwag. He was young, opened the innings in all formats of the game, but his attitude was the same. If there was a ball to be hit, he did, and all you could do was watch the ball go to the boundary helplessly, whether over or on the carpet, it's a four or a six.

If, at that time, instead of opening the innings, he were to come in the middle order, one doesn't know what his approach would be—would he play as care-free as he does up the order or will he play safe?

Now he is out of form and doesn't find a place anywhere, but should he be accommodated, I definitely think he will be looked at for the middle order. Then, what do you think his approach would be? From what I have known of the game and have seen him, he will try to hit himself out of trouble and would play instinctively.

Understanding Your Core

All this brings me to the point that we are what we are in the "core." Therefore, I would ask you to listen to your inner voice and check what you are in your core.

Knowledge and Experience Gathering

The other aspect is about your knowledge gathering, experience gathering, etc., which adds to your approach to life. Just check if there is a feeling of "Oh, I know about it" or whatever else. "Knowledge is Power, Knowledge is the future."

I would think you should be as natural as you can.

Best wishes.

You are absolutely right in your reply both times. I fully agree and appreciate every single word and the amount of control and restraint that you kept while writing because I know a few written words in Vinod's reply were potential irritants. You are right that it is a forum and nobody is paid for this consultancy.

Dear Vinod, I understand that no one likes to be under or overconfident or called so, but Dinesh came with an option. Whether it suits you or not, you need to control, especially being a contributing member. You seem to have lost your focus somewhere. Think about 10 years ago where you wanted to be. Have you achieved that, or does something need to be done? If something needs to be done, then what? What moves or steps should you take to reach your destination?

The kind of dilemma that you are going through is probably part of everyone's career (barring very few). I also went through the same. Did my condition improve today? "No"… But my approach did.

"Have you ever seen a moving elephant and the barking dogs?" Why should an elephant get distracted by these barking dogs if it is well looked after and well-fed, and if it knows it's moving in the right direction or has an option to change the lane if it's not? Think! You may get your answer somewhere, not from someone else but from your "VERY OWN INNER CONSCIOUS." Remember, EITHER YOU OR YOUR OWN GOD (As Per Your Belief System) IS THE MASTER OF YOUR DESTINY. Remain positive and be focused.

Regards,
Dr. Vikas

I wonder what you mean by 'restore the me in myself' and how we at CiteHR would be able to help you. Nevertheless, allow me to share some opinions. The act of you mellowing down (sticking to one job, being scared, giving a damn, etc.) may have happened because you grew up and hence took on more responsibilities—at work and in personal life.

When one is single and unattached, one doesn't have to give a damn about anyone. However, priorities change as one gets older and begets a family. Financials take precedence over many things.

As for the other part of your post, it is my opinion that one can't have it all. There's nothing such as 'perfect (you can add whatever—person, job, friend, boss, coworker, etc.)' And one would always want more. Maybe you are just surprised at how soft you have become.

Insights on Personal and Professional Growth

Setting myself aside for the moment—as it's incorrect to speak about myself—Dinesh Divekar, Dr. Vikas Vikram, and Adityaoak have provided valuable insights for contemplation. I would like to add that many individuals experience similar phases to what you are currently going through. Factors such as age, maturity, opportunities, situations, responsibilities, compulsions, environment, market changes, economic influences (both external—international US/Europe/ME/FE/LA and domestic/local), career paths, career goals, independence, respect, professional and personal choices, company perceptions (brands), peer and colleague influence, school/college connections, family, social standing, health, geographic location, personal comforts, compensation, personal aspirations, and more can all play a role in shaping us as individuals.

We are influenced by various combinations of these factors, each of which can impact us uniquely.

In conclusion, I would like to suggest that only you hold the answers to these questions, as no one else can truly understand and experience what you do.

Best wishes to you for all your future endeavors.

In my opinion, you have the answer in your own post. You have stated that you never stayed in a company for more than 1-2 years because of the confidence you had in the past. You believed that you would be able to find an alternate job by challenging your employer that you would quit employment on a specified date.

You are unable to challenge your current employer because you have a good pay packet and a good position now. I presume that you are unable to find alternate employment because of your past career track record of job-hopping every two years, citing some reason. The reasons for your exits from your past organizations could predominantly have been either a better position or a better salary. In your earlier employments, there could have been such politics, but before you could realize it, you would have switched your job without commitment or loyalty to your employer.

The Importance of Commitment and Loyalty

I am not propounding a theory on commitment/loyalty, etc. Nevertheless, it is essential that an employee stays long enough in an organization before understanding it and starts contributing to its growth. Personal growth is important, but organizational growth is equally vital. If an HR professional quits organizations every two years, then they will not be in a position to conduct exit interviews with a view to retaining people in the present organization.

Rejuvenate Your Confidence

Nothing has gone blank; rejuvenate the energy levels you had in the past. Nothing has changed in yourself; your perception has only changed. Challenge yourself to stay in your present organization and invest the knowledge and experience you have acquired in the past for the betterment of the organization.

Regards

This dilemma belongs to everyone at some point in their lives. You are afraid because your surroundings and circumstances in your personal life may have changed. Have you gotten married? Do you have kids to look after? Are you paying bigger EMIs for your flat and car? Are you planning something in the future that will require a constant flow of income?

Not being afraid, to my mind, comes from the fact that your monetary requirements are manageable. In that state, you can start looking for higher goals such as job satisfaction, independence, and working conditions. Being afraid is a natural state as you grow older, and it is not a lack of confidence. To my mind, it is an urge for stability and a pursuit of a bigger goal, which is to reach the top in your chosen area of activity (i.e., job hoppers are seldom given top posts).

Everyone needs to find a balance between being afraid and not being afraid. When it comes to workplace politics, it's everywhere. However, as a newcomer, you may not be a part of it initially due to perhaps ignorance. But as you spend more time, you start becoming a part of it, leading to moral and motivational concerns. There is rarely an ideal workplace. Yet, you should have enough motivation to go to the office every day, regardless of anything else.

My suggestion is to analyze your monetary requirements in relation to your life and then see if you have the independence to not be afraid. If you are in a good position financially, there is no reason why you can't get a good job. However, discretion is often the better part of valor.

Regards

Thank you, everyone. I was not clear in my post, which caused a lot of misunderstandings. I was shocked to see some of the feedback, including my reply. I liked Mr. Kannan's reply, as he could figure out some solutions without much detail from me.

This is my 13th year in the field. I head a core team of 5. Believe me, it's not the marriage, kids, or money I was afraid of. I was married 7 years ago; my son was 1 year old when I switched to my present company. As a matter of fact, I have very good offers in hand, but I don't want to accept them as they are based out of Bangalore.

My company is good, one of the top in its field. It was a set of people in the company who wanted to achieve something by bringing in some bios in some procedures. I couldn't oppose because some top people were okay with it.

Though none of the issues were directly related to me, people started saying, "Policy and procedures are not implemented properly by HR here," as the people sitting in HR are weak, and some people actually started playing politics with this. The words used were as strong as they could be, and I found myself in the midst of dirty politics. I had to accept some forced procedures.

I wanted to leave but was not willing to go out of the city for another job. That was the dilemma I was in.

Our company policy is very strong, but procedures keep changing, giving room for disturbed working conditions.

On a Friday evening, I sent a well-worked strategic email to everyone concerned, from my grade to 5 grades above, in all departments on 3 definite issues. I also proposed the inclusion of a few new lines in procedural guidelines (not the policy) on 3 definite processes. I made a big noise about it, briefly explained below.

Proposal 1: Any new proposals or situation-specific official requests, deviations in procedures by any employee, have to be made/informed directly to the "Unit Head" only. Reporting authorities will only be in CC, and any reply or comment by the Unit Head to such requests will be sent to the concerned departments.

Background: In most request cases, immediate bosses used to suppress the requests of subordinates, stating as deviations. For example, procurement of new advanced equipment, etc., which are not budgeted but very much required.

Proposal 2: No verbal requests or commands to carry on any job or issues involving money/finance, or which involves other departments by heads.

Background: At times, department heads allocate some staff to other departmental works in emergencies. Later, the same department heads question such staff for the gap in their regular work.

Proposal 3: HR is not a rubber stamp. We are not here to stamp your dirty papers; they will be sent to garbage bins from now on.

Background: Making approval notes after completion of the job and sending to HR for signing as initiated, which is already signed by heads, hence we can't refuse them.

Proposals may look very silly, but they changed my world. It was a hammer hit like "Get in the procedure or get lost." I even asked a couple of seniors who were like, "What was the need to make this a big issue?" "Well, sir, how did you come this far without knowing it?"

Things are very much back on track, at least for the time being. My team is in the limelight. Meetings are being held by finance, planning, procurement, and execution teams, and some of them got well-deserved paybacks for their deeds.

But I know I have to expect some challenges in return. I also have plans to change this job too... This is communicated in advance.

Warm Regards,

Vinod Kumar. HR