Is It Fair to Ask Someone to Resign for Meeting an Ex-Employee? Seeking Advice on a Tough Situation

Dear Seniors,

One of my friends joined an organization as the head of the department with three direct reports four months ago. Upon joining, the team provided my friend with a lot of negative feedback about the organization, but my friend did not react. A former colleague who had resigned from the company requested to meet my friend, as he had resigned in my friend's absence while my friend was on leave. Initially, my friend declined the meeting and asked the colleague to come to the office if he wished to meet. However, the colleague insisted, leading my friend to meet him for just 10 minutes to have a general conversation. During the meeting, the colleague expressed regret for resigning in my friend's absence, mentioned his aspirations for growth, and the need for guidance for further studies, which led to his resignation.

Unfortunately, my friend did not inform his boss, MD, or director about this meeting, considering it unimportant, and also due to heavy workload, it slipped his mind. Eventually, they found out, and based on this information, they requested my friend to resign. My friend is deeply concerned as he joined the organization through a known contact, who has now distanced themselves.

Being a non-confirmed employee and having only been with the company for four months, my friend's decision to join was influenced by the fact that he had spent just six months at his previous organization. He left that organization to work under the known boss.

My friend has lost all confidence and is experiencing deep depression as he cannot understand the grounds on which the company is asking him to leave. He is unwilling to listen to any explanations, and his career is now at stake.

Thanks & Regards

My comments are based on the assumption that whatever you have written is true. Nothing is more bizarre than asking an employee to resign because he met an ex-employee. Anybody can meet anybody in their personal time. Why does your management have objections to this meeting? I feel that there is something more than meets the eye.

Possibly, the ex-employee knows some dark secrets or wrongdoings of the company. Why else would a company be so perturbed when a current employee meets an ex-employee?

Alternatively, the management may have wanted to remove your friend and was searching for a reason. Now they could be using this instance as an alibi. But again, that's nonsense. They could have clearly stated why they are removing your friend.

Is it possible that your friend has been involved in some shady activities? It seems like he has lost the confidence of management. Has he made someone's position insecure?

As a solution, I can only suggest that he requests a personal meeting with the MD to obtain clarification. To protect his employment, he should ask for an apology (even in writing). If nothing works, then it may be his fate, and advise him to move on.

Regards,
Dinesh V Divekar

Thank you for your response. I appreciate it. My friend has not engaged in any shady activities. In fact, within a short time, he tried to streamline things.

One thing to bring to your notice is that for the past year, this position has been vacant, and his junior was managing things and reporting to the MD at the Head Office. Now, he is reporting to my friend. He is based at the Head Office, whereas my friend is located at another regional office. Initially, my friend was informed that the team would be shifted to the regional office, including his junior, but this did not happen. My friend apologized to the management. He does not belong to that place and relocated from his hometown for this job.

He suspects that a new person in another department has referred a close relative for his position due to some issues at their current company. He is concerned that they are using this as an excuse to avoid facing his competency. He believed in the senior person who joined the company and relocated but now has lost all hope and faith. He is afraid to join work and is experiencing depression. Despite his requests, he has not received a positive response.

Thank you.

First and foremost, one must learn to work for the organization and not for people. People may come and go, but the organization remains. If someone decides to join an organization based on where their boss is moving, they are insecure and not confident enough. This is a lesson your friend must learn.

Risks of Meeting with Ex-Employees

Why meet with an ex-employee and risk being fired? Even if you meet or talk to your counterpart in another branch or region, you get fired? Don't you find this preposterous? There are certain organizations, and therefore, it is not surprising that your friend faced such a situation in your organization.

The Role of Honesty in HR

I always tell my team, "Are you sure you want to be in the HR Department? Are you sure you want to pursue a career in HR? If you are sure, strive to be honest, free from all cheap politics, and straightforward." In my opinion, the HR department must be synonymous with honesty. Those who fail to grasp this may engage in politics and use you (or your friend) as a scapegoat to advance their own agendas.

As Dinesh mentioned in the previous post, this may have been a scheme to remove your friend from the company by certain vested interests. There is no use in dwelling on this matter. Whether knowingly or unknowingly, your friend fell victim to this situation.

Overcoming Challenges and Moving Forward

There is no benefit in becoming depressed or losing confidence. Mistakes are a part of life. As Swami Vivekananda said, "If you do not face problems, you are not on the right path." If one door closes, another opens. Problems refine you like a diamond; you grow stronger as you confront them. There is no reason for your friend to be upset. With his HR skills and talent, he will quickly secure another job. Don't waste time and energy on negative individuals. I encourage him to relax—watch a movie, take a trip, listen to Carnatic or classical music, and rejuvenate. Success is continuous, and failure is not permanent. Keep smiling and moving forward.

Regards,
V. Balaji