Dissatisfaction With Manager - How To Handle ? - CiteHR
Dinesh Divekar
Business Mentor, Consultant And Trainer
S.Chandrasekar
Hr-manager, Trainer, Writer
+1 Other

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Hi Guru's

I am person with 10+ years experience with a role of middle management in a software company in BLR. I have an issue with my manager. She is a senior manager who recently joined the company (Feb 2008) and I have had many issues with her:

1. Gives regular feedback to me which is neither constructive nor structured. For eg: She recently told me that "HR indicated that you have been blunt with some of your employees"..never tells me the source of the feedback how it has impacted persons/individuals or delivery..

2. Recently she made a very snide comment in front of my subordinate "You are the manager, you better start acting like one.." I really did not appreciate this comment.

I have been with the company for 1+ years and have built up a good reputation and credibility with the client. I have a team of 20-25 members who report to me and they seem to be happy with me as their manager.

How should I deal with my boss..I feel she is very inexperienced from a "People management" perspective..I feel very demotivated..even though I am happy with my role in the organization, I am thinking of quitting my job and moving onto another only because of my new boss. I tried giving my feedback on my boss to HR but they did nothing happened. I can go my boss's boss but I really don't think my boss will like that. Should I seek help of HR head ...please advice..

Thanks

Dear Ashok,

From your post, following is my inference:

a) that in your company there is a great need of training "Interpersonal Skills".

b) When your manager told that "HR indicated that you have been blunt with some of your employees”, you could have sought the clarification from her and asked her was there any better way of giving feedback to your staff.

c) Again when on her remark "You are the manager, you better start acting like one..", you could have sought clarification from her on your management style.

d) You say that "I have been with the company for 1+ year and have built up a good reputation and credibility with the client. I have a team of 20-25 members who report to me and they seem to be happy with me as their manager." This is your perception. How about perception of your staff about you? Have tried to take their feedback any time?

e) There is no point in quitting job. It's better to keep lines of communication open. Talk to your manager first. If you are not satisfied, let the second meeting be conducted in the presence of HR. Record the minutes of the meeting

f) How come your company does not have policy on redressing grievances of employees? Talk to HR to institute policy of this kind. Institution of Grievance Redressal Machinery was done by Personnel Department in the erstwhile era. HR is next step of Personnel.

g) Keep HR informed about the style of feedback of your manager. Let couple of such instances happen. Keep their record. If really nothings happens, then you are free to put in papers.

Thanks,

Dinesh V Divekar

Freelance Soft Skill & Behavioural Trainer

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**** */**** Following are just personal remarks and they dont target at anyone, I am not responsible for any consequences which may occur due to following these suggestons ************

Hi there..

well, I dont have a high amount of work ex. like you do, but i have understood the soem lessons in life, i would like to share,

when ever you are accused of any comments/charges, get those resolved right then, ask for instances, there is no other way to save urself.

secondly, i have learnt, the more you are afraid of anyone, the more u fear, the more they will make you, suppress you!

if a manager doesnt like u, she/he'll continusly try to harm u by any means. in that case either fight for ur justice, or do the other way!... which is to go and talk with manager calmly and amicably.. ask for what is the problem, if it can be solved, if not.. .. then find a new job!!!

believe me! givings trainings on interpersonal skills, soft skills doesnt change ppl., ppl are always the same.

Going to higher authorities and HR never works , infacts makes the matter even worse for the lower ranked person, (unless you have the support of a big mob)

the guru mantra is to avoid feuds, issues, and keep working under same situations (which may get worse sooner or later), or make a god-father who can save u from problems, or have the fighting spirit to fight for your justice if you are absolutly correct and genuine!!!

all the best

**** */**** Above are just personal remarks and they dont target at anyone, I am not responsible for any consequences which may occur due to following these suggestons ************

Dear MK,

I have gone through your post. Since these are your personal opinions, I have nothing to say against them but I would like to say something on "believe me! givings trainings on interpersonal skills, soft skills doesnt change ppl., ppl are always the same."

It all depends on the type of company that you work with. Success of training depends on following:

a) your organisation culture
b) your management
c) your managers
d) your staffs
e) the training company

I have written article in Deccan Herald "Why employee training fails?" wherein I had discussed most of the points. Later couple of education institutions had called me to give guest lecture on this subject. You <link outdated-removed> here to read the article.

My personal experience about my training workshops are as below:

a) In one overseas recruitment company (that has 10 branches across India) cost of their poor time management skills worked out to whopping Rs 1,10,000/- per month! Add up this was cost of non-delegation and it was Rs 15,000/-

b) I conducted training programme on "Effective Decision Making Skills" for the plant engineers of one manufacturing set up. I had asked them what would have happened if they had taken this training before 1 year or 6 months? They came to the conclusion that from the 18 participants , they could have saved revenue worth of Rs 20-25 lakh in the last year.

I can give endless number of examples like these. What I am trying to say is that training managers or HR or management are not in position to give feedback to trainers what quantum of revenue leakage takes place because of the gap in the skills/knowledge of the employees.

Many times trainers' selection is based on their verbal communication skills. Few trainers are successfully able to mask to their lack of commercial sense because of their verbal communication skills. Secondly, feedback of the participants of the past workshops is always there to market new training programmes. But nobody talks about the revenue change through their workshops!

Your opinions are nothing but your perceptions based on view of the parts and not a larger picture as a whole. May be that you need to come across with a better company or better training company.

Warm regards,

Dinesh V Divekar
Soft Skill and Behavioural Training Consultant

dineshdivekar(at)yahoo.com

Hi

After carefully reading your case, the following points come to my mind on analysis.

1) This may be a handiwork of your management also.
2) She wants to remove you and bring in her choice
3) She perhaps believes that cane and whip will work in today's environment
4) Wants to establish among staff that she is strong, strict and upright ringmaster
5) Would have been a Manager for years without proper ethics of handling employees
6) Immediately wants to prove to management that she is a critic and activist
7) She may have dislikes towards male counterparts and could be a psycho
8) She would have been allowed to grow and ruin herself by her previous employers
9) Her colleagues would have wilfully glorified her to kick her out of contest
10) Desperately she had come to the new nest and wants to build a dominion

If things are not appealing on your side, just wait for the right time to jump out. With much of curriculum and theories dumped by the modern day MBA, statistics say that atleast 3/9 earn a bad name just out of vanity and wrong attitude.

Though I am a HR Manager and writer, from my point of view MBA is after all a degree. It is just a walking stick to help in walking. The stick will not walk for the walker. So possibly your lady boss may belong to a wrong school of Pride and prejudice.

Regards,
Chandru

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