After 2 years of selfless service, a man realized that he has not been promoted, no transfer, no salary increase, no commendation, and that the company is not doing anything about it. So he decided to walk up to his HR Manager one morning and after exchanging greetings, he told his HR Manager his observation. The boss looked at him, laughed, and asked him to sit down saying; "My friend, you have not worked here for even one day."
The man was surprised to hear this, but the manager went on to explain.
Manager: How many days are there in a year?
Man: 365 days and sometimes 366.
Manager: How many hours make up a day?
Man: 24 hours.
Manager: How long do you work in a day?
Man: 8 am to 4 pm, i.e., 8 hours a day.
Manager: So, what fraction of the day do you work in hours?
Man: (He did some arithmetic and said 8/24 hours, i.e., 1/3 (one third)).
Manager: That is nice of you! What is one-third of 366 days?
Man: 122 (1/3 x 366 = 122 in days).
Manager: Do you come to work on weekends?
Man: No sir.
Manager: How many days are there in a year that are weekends?
Man: 52 Saturdays and 52 Sundays equal to 104 days.
Manager: Thanks for that. If you remove 104 days from 122 days, how many days do you now have?
Man: 18 days.
Manager: OK! I do give you 2 weeks sick leave every year. Now remove that 14 days from the 18 days left. How many days do you have remaining?
Man: 4 days.
Manager: Do you work on New Year's day?
Man: No sir!
Manager: Do you come to work on workers' day?
Man: No sir!
Manager: So how many days are left?
Man: 2 days sir!
Manager: Do you come to work on the (National holiday)?
Man: No sir!
Manager: So how many days are left?
Man: 1 day sir!
Manager: Do you work on Christmas day?
Man: No sir!
Manager: So how many days are left?
Man: None sir!
Manager: So, what are you claiming?
Man: I have understood, Sir. I did not realize that I was stealing the company's money all these days.
Moral: NEVER GO TO HR FOR HELP!!!
From Qatar
The man was surprised to hear this, but the manager went on to explain.
Manager: How many days are there in a year?
Man: 365 days and sometimes 366.
Manager: How many hours make up a day?
Man: 24 hours.
Manager: How long do you work in a day?
Man: 8 am to 4 pm, i.e., 8 hours a day.
Manager: So, what fraction of the day do you work in hours?
Man: (He did some arithmetic and said 8/24 hours, i.e., 1/3 (one third)).
Manager: That is nice of you! What is one-third of 366 days?
Man: 122 (1/3 x 366 = 122 in days).
Manager: Do you come to work on weekends?
Man: No sir.
Manager: How many days are there in a year that are weekends?
Man: 52 Saturdays and 52 Sundays equal to 104 days.
Manager: Thanks for that. If you remove 104 days from 122 days, how many days do you now have?
Man: 18 days.
Manager: OK! I do give you 2 weeks sick leave every year. Now remove that 14 days from the 18 days left. How many days do you have remaining?
Man: 4 days.
Manager: Do you work on New Year's day?
Man: No sir!
Manager: Do you come to work on workers' day?
Man: No sir!
Manager: So how many days are left?
Man: 2 days sir!
Manager: Do you come to work on the (National holiday)?
Man: No sir!
Manager: So how many days are left?
Man: 1 day sir!
Manager: Do you work on Christmas day?
Man: No sir!
Manager: So how many days are left?
Man: None sir!
Manager: So, what are you claiming?
Man: I have understood, Sir. I did not realize that I was stealing the company's money all these days.
Moral: NEVER GO TO HR FOR HELP!!!
From Qatar
Hi,
Thanks for the jokes, but gentlemen, we HR people are here to help and serve employees, not to demoralize them. By saying this, you are portraying a negative image of HR professionals. Please refrain from doing so. Your joke is wonderful; please continue sending similar ones in the future.
Regards,
Manish
From India, Delhi
Thanks for the jokes, but gentlemen, we HR people are here to help and serve employees, not to demoralize them. By saying this, you are portraying a negative image of HR professionals. Please refrain from doing so. Your joke is wonderful; please continue sending similar ones in the future.
Regards,
Manish
From India, Delhi
Its task is to make people capable of joint performance, to make their weaknesses irrelevant, says the Management Guru Peter Drucker. It creates harmony in working together - equilibrium in thoughts and actions, goals and achievements, plans and performance, products, and markets. It resolves situations of scarcity, be they in the physical, technical, or human fields, through maximum utilization with the minimum available processes to achieve the goal. Lack of management causes disorder, confusion, wastage, delay, destruction, and even depression. Managing men, money, and materials in the best possible way, according to circumstances and environment, is the most important and essential factor for successful management.
From India, Kochi
From India, Kochi
As a joke, it is so-so. But I think the man is a fool to fall into the trap of the HR to accept that he is eating company money. If the man has fallen prey to the discussions of the HR, then he is not intelligent enough and fit to work in an organization. God save such men, such HRs, and the organizations having such HRs.
Col Rajaram
Col Rajaram
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