Addressing Workplace Misconduct and False Rumors
In my company (located in Bangalore, India), there is one colleague whom I used to help with her work. As she was struggling, I also assisted her with her studies at my home. However, she would often initiate inappropriate conversations. Despite being aware of the potential consequences, I always maintained a professional distance. When she learned about my upcoming marriage, her behavior towards me changed. It became apparent that she may have developed feelings for me. To mitigate this situation, I changed my seating arrangement and minimized our interactions by moving my seat further away from hers. Subsequently, she began spreading false rumors about me in the office. Despite my efforts to apologize for any misunderstandings, the situation did not improve.
I found myself constantly subjected to mental distress due to the ongoing rumors. Therefore, I decided to address the issue directly by calling her on a Sunday to clarify matters. During the conversation, she insisted that the issues were solely work-related, which left me puzzled about what "official reasons" she was referring to. I urged her to let go of the past and suggested that we try to maintain a friendly relationship at least. Additionally, I confronted her about misrepresenting her work experience, as she claimed to have three years of experience when she actually only had one. I have a recording of this call for reference.
The following Monday passed without any communication between us, creating a tense atmosphere. However, on Tuesday, my Team Lead approached me, inquiring about an alleged incident involving the colleague from the previous day, even though I had not interacted with her. When she later approached me for a discussion, I declined, fearing that engaging with her might lead to further complications.
At this point, I am determined to remove her from my immediate surroundings. I am considering reporting her use of a falsified experience letter during her initial employment one year ago.
I would appreciate your advice on how to proceed in this situation.
Regards
From India, Bangalore
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In my company (located in Bangalore, India), there is one colleague whom I used to help with her work. As she was struggling, I also assisted her with her studies at my home. However, she would often initiate inappropriate conversations. Despite being aware of the potential consequences, I always maintained a professional distance. When she learned about my upcoming marriage, her behavior towards me changed. It became apparent that she may have developed feelings for me. To mitigate this situation, I changed my seating arrangement and minimized our interactions by moving my seat further away from hers. Subsequently, she began spreading false rumors about me in the office. Despite my efforts to apologize for any misunderstandings, the situation did not improve.
I found myself constantly subjected to mental distress due to the ongoing rumors. Therefore, I decided to address the issue directly by calling her on a Sunday to clarify matters. During the conversation, she insisted that the issues were solely work-related, which left me puzzled about what "official reasons" she was referring to. I urged her to let go of the past and suggested that we try to maintain a friendly relationship at least. Additionally, I confronted her about misrepresenting her work experience, as she claimed to have three years of experience when she actually only had one. I have a recording of this call for reference.
The following Monday passed without any communication between us, creating a tense atmosphere. However, on Tuesday, my Team Lead approached me, inquiring about an alleged incident involving the colleague from the previous day, even though I had not interacted with her. When she later approached me for a discussion, I declined, fearing that engaging with her might lead to further complications.
At this point, I am determined to remove her from my immediate surroundings. I am considering reporting her use of a falsified experience letter during her initial employment one year ago.
I would appreciate your advice on how to proceed in this situation.
Regards
From India, Bangalore
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Considerations Before Reporting a Fake Experience
If you want to report her fake experience, you are free to do so by writing an official letter or email to your company, provided you have evidence of her experience certificate being fake. Otherwise, she may claim compensation for defamation. On the other hand, she may bring charges against you, including charges of sexual harassment in the workplace. There could be a lot of mudslinging. Please note that in most cases of harassment, the law tends to favor women.
In your specific situation, I strongly believe you have put yourself in this position, and no one else is responsible. Instead of reporting the fake certificate, you should consider changing your behavior and professionalism in the workplace. At this stage, this situation does not necessitate legal intervention.
Regards
From India, Kolkata
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247If you want to report her fake experience, you are free to do so by writing an official letter or email to your company, provided you have evidence of her experience certificate being fake. Otherwise, she may claim compensation for defamation. On the other hand, she may bring charges against you, including charges of sexual harassment in the workplace. There could be a lot of mudslinging. Please note that in most cases of harassment, the law tends to favor women.
In your specific situation, I strongly believe you have put yourself in this position, and no one else is responsible. Instead of reporting the fake certificate, you should consider changing your behavior and professionalism in the workplace. At this stage, this situation does not necessitate legal intervention.
Regards
From India, Kolkata
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Dear Riteshmaity,
Thanks for the advice. I will keep it in mind.
Recording of Phone Call
As I informed earlier, I recorded the phone call last Sunday where I asked her how much experience she claimed when joining the company. She said three years, then I asked how much real experience she has. She said one year. This can be seen as her admitting that she used a fake letter when joining.
I also asked her if I ever touched her in my room, even when she used to talk about sex. She admitted I never touched her. All I want is for her to leave me alone and stop playing dirty games. I don't want to switch companies either, at least for the next three years. I can change the project, but only after February 2018, as per the company's policy.
I don't want to report her and bring problems into her life, but currently, she is doing the same. So, even though I have proof, I will take this step if any new incidents come to light. I hope she reads this post and stops these actions. Please advise if there are any errors in my ways.
From India, Bangalore
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Thanks for the advice. I will keep it in mind.
Recording of Phone Call
As I informed earlier, I recorded the phone call last Sunday where I asked her how much experience she claimed when joining the company. She said three years, then I asked how much real experience she has. She said one year. This can be seen as her admitting that she used a fake letter when joining.
I also asked her if I ever touched her in my room, even when she used to talk about sex. She admitted I never touched her. All I want is for her to leave me alone and stop playing dirty games. I don't want to switch companies either, at least for the next three years. I can change the project, but only after February 2018, as per the company's policy.
I don't want to report her and bring problems into her life, but currently, she is doing the same. So, even though I have proof, I will take this step if any new incidents come to light. I hope she reads this post and stops these actions. Please advise if there are any errors in my ways.
From India, Bangalore
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You have been with the company for a long time. It would be advisable to speak to a senior person who is also your well-wisher about these personal issues as they cannot be resolved here.
Remember to preserve the memory card (in case she lands you in trouble); that's the maximum suggestion I can offer.
From India, Chennai
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Remember to preserve the memory card (in case she lands you in trouble); that's the maximum suggestion I can offer.
From India, Chennai
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Thanks, Guys,
Developments in the Scenario
1) I was given a task to review and manage a team of three for a small project. She played games and convinced my lead that they didn't need me for this project, claiming it was very simple. The funny part is she wasted about two weeks and couldn't accomplish anything for that project. So, the project came back to me, but this time I had to work as a developer only. I lost a golden chance to learn leadership and demonstrate my methods to get things done.
2) On 27th March, I was ambushed (luckily, it was meant as a threat to me, not to physically harm me) by three guys near my house while I was returning home. Initially, I only had doubts about her, but soon, based on her body language or my instinct, I am sure she is either behind this attack or she knows the people involved.
3) In the absence of evidence, I spoke with my project lead and HR. They are both ready to take the necessary steps, i.e., they will have a meeting with her, give her a warning, and she will be held accountable if something happens to me or my future wife.
Honestly, I am very angry and upset with her. All I ever tried was to help her along with other friends. Sometimes I feel I should officially report to the company about her fake experience. But I think it would be inhumane. She may end up losing her job, or worse.
I have decided I will switch to another company as soon as I get another offer, no matter how good a rating I received here or how much appreciation I received from seniors (onsite and offshore). I am going to be responsible for my wife and our future, and I am going to give her a happy life.
But as a precaution, I have saved the recordings into Google Drive. (Thanks HR4Nation for the idea).
Regards
From India, Bangalore
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Developments in the Scenario
1) I was given a task to review and manage a team of three for a small project. She played games and convinced my lead that they didn't need me for this project, claiming it was very simple. The funny part is she wasted about two weeks and couldn't accomplish anything for that project. So, the project came back to me, but this time I had to work as a developer only. I lost a golden chance to learn leadership and demonstrate my methods to get things done.
2) On 27th March, I was ambushed (luckily, it was meant as a threat to me, not to physically harm me) by three guys near my house while I was returning home. Initially, I only had doubts about her, but soon, based on her body language or my instinct, I am sure she is either behind this attack or she knows the people involved.
3) In the absence of evidence, I spoke with my project lead and HR. They are both ready to take the necessary steps, i.e., they will have a meeting with her, give her a warning, and she will be held accountable if something happens to me or my future wife.
Honestly, I am very angry and upset with her. All I ever tried was to help her along with other friends. Sometimes I feel I should officially report to the company about her fake experience. But I think it would be inhumane. She may end up losing her job, or worse.
I have decided I will switch to another company as soon as I get another offer, no matter how good a rating I received here or how much appreciation I received from seniors (onsite and offshore). I am going to be responsible for my wife and our future, and I am going to give her a happy life.
But as a precaution, I have saved the recordings into Google Drive. (Thanks HR4Nation for the idea).
Regards
From India, Bangalore
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