Unethical Interview Questions: How Would You Respond to This HR Dilemma?

Dear All,

I just wanted to share my experience with a Malaysian BPO in Bangalore. I had a telephonic interview with the concerned person for a position in the HR Department. The second question the lady asked me was, "Are you planning to have kids soon because I don't need the incumbent to take maternity leave now." Remember, this is the second question after the interview started.

Again, she asked me if I am planning to have kids in the coming year. I pointed out it is not in my hands to say when. When she pressed, I politely pointed out that it is an unethical question. She scornfully said it is ethical and she knows it well because she is in the HR Field.

Please comment on this and let us have a meaningful discussion on this topic.

Thanks and Regards,
Rose

Hi,

The same case was presented a few months back. It is purely unethical about this question. The same can be avoided if the company is experiencing a shortage of manpower; they should hire more people. Why behave like this? I suppose all employees in that company should either be bachelors or forced bachelors. Better you did not accept that offer.

Hi,

She is concerned if you are going to be on long leave just after joining. Sometimes it becomes necessary. Suppose you are appointing a person for a responsible post where you have sharp deadlines, it becomes important to know as the maternity leave is from 3 to 6 months. Maybe she should have put it in a different way. There is nothing unethical, I feel.

Jayashree

Of course, I agree with you Jayasree. According to the situations, she might have asked, but the way she put the question may be wrong. She can't say that she is in HR and she can ask anything.

To conclude this, yes, there is nothing as such as unethical or ethical. It was a part of the discussions to meet some of the criteria, and she would have clearly told you before asking this type of question.

Thanks,

- Mirza

Hello,

In the process of a career, one should not lose family values. It is okay to ask about marriage plans when hiring a fresher or a lady, but not plans for intending to have kids. It is God's blessing to have kids. I feel there should not be ambiguity in questions during the interview. I'm shocked by the way recruiters treat the applicants.

Regards,
Rajeshwari

Dear Rose,

Though outwardly, the question seems irrelevant, if you delve deeper into the aspect, the interviewer wants to know about your future plans regarding continuing with them. Additionally, she is interested in understanding how much importance you place on other factors.

There is nothing wrong with the question she has posed, but it requires a tactful response. You could have skillfully redirected the conversation.

L. Kumar

Dear all,

I understand the sentiments that you have, but we need to look at it in a more professional manner. How can we determine whether or not the question is ethical or unethical? There is no law as such to prevent such questions. It's completely a company's call whether or not they want to hire people who are planning kids. I have seen a couple of instances where ladies (no offense meant for the feminine gender) join a particular organization, and by the time the training is over and they sort of get a hang of the job, they apply for maternity leave. Also, at times due to family pressure, they aren't able to get back to work for the next 1/2 years. The same is applicable for students. We need to look at this problem from an employer's point of view. An employer spends so much on hiring, training, and developing an employee, and after all that, if the employee goes on leave, there is no assurance that the employee will return.

As for the HR lady saying that she is from the HR field and knows that the question is unethical, I feel she is right. As I mentioned above, there is no law that prevents such questions. If the employer is desperate to hire people, we must also remember that people are desperate to get good jobs.

P.S. This reply is my personal opinion, and I don't mean to hurt anyone's sentiments.

Hi Jaspal,

I agree with you that the question is relevant. However, there is no need to bring in law here. In HR, we are dealing with people and focusing on how best we can motivate them to be more productive. Therefore, we simply need to frame our questions in a way that ensures no one feels offended or questions the type of company we are. As representatives of our company, ethics are crucial.

Jayashree

I am shocked to know some HR professionals do this, and many HR practitioners here support the unethical questions asked. If the HR team thinks the question was ethical, valid, and a prerequisite for the job, then why not just include it in the job description itself? For example, stating that only candidates who are not planning to have kids in the next two years are eligible to apply.

These HR professionals in the BPO industry are often like this, lacking knowledge and simply following whatever their foreign clients ask of them. Hence, BPO employees are sometimes referred to as cyber coolies due to the nature of the work they perform. It is a shame on HR that we have individuals conducting themselves in such a manner.

My advice would be to move on from this interview experience and seek a good job opportunity elsewhere, not necessarily within a BPO environment.

Thank you all for your insightful comments on the topic. I believe it is appropriate to inquire about sensitive matters during an interview, such as family planning, if done tactfully. Personally, as a woman, I have refrained from directly asking candidates about their plans for starting a family over the years, as marital status often provides a clue.

I recall a thoughtful approach taken by a former employer when this topic arose. She framed the question as follows: "I am aware that asking about family plans in the US could lead to legal issues, but may I inquire if you intend to prioritize your career equally post starting a family?" I found this approach to be both respectful and effective.

My intention in raising this issue is to highlight the importance of maintaining professionalism in interview settings, especially for HR professionals. I am confident that with our collective insights, we can enhance our interview practices.

Best Regards,
Rose

Hey Jayshree,

How can you bring a law like that? Even if you do bring a law, you are not thinking from an employer's perspective. Ok, answer this. You screen a lot of people and then hire a candidate. You train her. You groom her according to your company's needs. When finally it's time to expect results from that employee, he/she walks up to you with a leave application. Now, I would like to know what happens if the candidate does not return. Also, the maternity leave (or study leave which can be from a month to 3 months) affects the performance of that particular function.

All I am trying to say is that let us not look at only one aspect of the story.

Yes, I agree that HR should have asked the question using proper words. By the way, one should also appreciate the HR lady for coming up with that question. I have experienced this in my previous employment - by not asking this question to a lady in my department, even after providing the necessary knowledge and skills, she eventually had to go on leave. I felt helpless and was unable to prevent it.

Asking this question cannot be considered unethical. What could be deemed unethical is if the HR lady said, "You must join and are not allowed to have any kids." Maybe you can overlook her lack of appropriate wording. It's best to let it go instead of carrying it in your mind for days or months.

Regards,

TRLakshmi Narayanan

Having gone through the comments, I think that the interviewer was less tactful. It's better for both parties to be clear in their demands right from the beginning and set the right expectations. It's actually good that the interviewer was open about the job requirements, as you can infer that the company may not be female-friendly. So, there's nothing to feel bad about; take it as a misstep with which the interviewer began.

What is so unethical about it? It is a straight professional question. As an HR person, she was just seeing the organizational goal. People, please grow up.

Rose, I suppose that you need to look at these things from a less sensitive viewpoint.

Workplaces are high-pressure environments and are deadline-driven, especially in the BPO/KPO/IT sectors. Many people do not believe in beating around the bush and come straight to the point. You need not be sensitive about such things. You cannot question the interviewer's right to ask questions that might affect the work - a 3 to 6-month leave span definitely affects the work schedules. I agree that the interviewer could have done this more tactfully, though.

Naresh

There is nothing unethical about it. The question has to be put in the right perspective. Even putting the right question and all these precautions, I had seen female employees after enjoying the maternity benefits from the company come and give the resignation letter within 1 month of joining.

Sivakumar

Hi,

There is no doubt that it was utterly unethical. I think she is not a good interviewer. She has to know and follow the legal aspects like maternity act and other things. Please don't take such types of offers.

Regards,
VENKAT
HR Manager

Hello Rose,

The question asked to you was 'really unethically'... Nowhere in the world does anyone ask unlawful questions. "Maybe the company wants only bachelors who can work during shifts." So please avoid such offers.

From,
Praveen Kumar

To come to the point, if the companies are so worried about female employees going on maternity leave, why don't they recruit only males for their jobs? Is this a joke or what? Tomorrow they may even ask: When are you getting married? How many kids do you plan to have? When do you plan to have your first child? How many leaves will you take for marriage?

Taking leaves cannot be prevented. If an emergency happens, employees may be absent for more than a month. At such times, the company needs to support the employee rather than withdrawing their support for such things.

Hello Everyone,

I just went through the rather heated discussion regarding the ethics behind that question. I would just like to add that although I feel it's okay to ask such a question towards the end of an interview, it was definitely inappropriate as a second question. Besides, it's an important question because my organization is also facing such an issue. A recent hire who joined us 3-4 months back in a crucial HR function has gone on maternity leave for 6 months during a time when her workload would be maximum, which I feel leaves the organization back to square one. As it is, it's difficult to retain and attract people so organizations definitely need to keep such things in mind while recruiting.

However, as HR professionals, we need to be well-versed in the art of tactful interviewing. I think it's a basic prerequisite.

Regards,
Richa

Hi Rose,

There is nothing unethical about this question; it's just that it was asked too early. Some companies, when hiring female staff, are very careful because, after all, they invest in training and it takes time to familiarize the staff with the company environment. So, to be on the safe side, sometimes questions like these arise.

And remember, before accepting any offer, the ball is in your court, so relax and don't think too much about it.

Regards, Fahd Khan Sherani

Hi Rose,

The question asked is unethical. What is the meaning of "Are you planning to have kids"? It is a personal question, and anyone, whoever it might be, should not peep into the personal lives of others.

Regards,
Shekar

Dear All,

I just wanted to share my experience with a Malaysian BPO in Bangalore. I had a telephonic interview with the concerned person for a position in the HR Department. The second question the lady asked me was, "Are you planning to have kids soon because I don't need the incumbent to take maternity leave now." Remember, this is the second question after the interview started.

Again, she asked me if I am planning to have kids in the coming year. I pointed out it is not in my hands to say when. When she pressed, I politely pointed out that it is an unethical question. She scornfully said it is ethical and she knows it well because she is in the HR Field.

Please comment on this and let us have a meaningful discussion on this topic.

Thanks and Regards,
Rose

Had you been in the US, you could have sued that lady for millions of dollars. :D :D It is unethical to ask any question which intrudes the privacy of a candidate or even any question related to race, age, or religion. So, just chill.

Well,
what should I say...
I have been demoted from my job (and probably forced to quit) due to the fact that I am pregnant.
No, they didn't mention that as the reason for the demotion; they stated it was because of my inability to complete certain tasks (which, you know...).
Anyway, just a diversion from the actual topic, but it was really shocking and hurtful when this decision was communicated to me.
Wish me luck.

What type of industry do you work in? I'm interested in getting more details if you're willing to share. Kindly PM me for further information.

In life, there are no absolutes. The culture of different countries/organizations determines what is ethical or unethical, reflecting their values. It could be important for them to know the answer for clarity, especially in time-bound projects or initiatives. We in India should be fairly comfortable in answering such questions. Yes, it is indeed an awkward question.

Regards, Sunil Chandra

Hey Rose,

I know it's a sad state of affairs with our HR. Quite a few times I have come across such people who can't even frame the right question in the right manner or are not competent enough to judge you. But then the question in your case was just not framed right, that's all.

From the company's point of view, yes, they do invest a lot in you, only to go through the whole process once again in a few months' time. Thanks to the high attrition rate.

It depends a lot on the right person interviewing you, if you are fortunate, that is... 😊

I found it rather funny when I read many of the postings on the topic here. Yes, I agree, the HR in question did not frame the question well, but even I ask this question to all lady candidates in most industries today. We just don't have the cushion of asking people to join and go on a paid maternity leave within 3-6 months.

What makes the comments "funny" is the line of thought that kids are still God's blessings. Hello, in the SEC A segments (where our BPO execs belong), GOD doesn't give children. Kids happen because you decide to have one. As a counselor, I ask many a patient if they are financially ready for a child, if they are emotionally ready for a child, if they are infrastructurally ready for a child, etc.

Come out of this bourgeois mentality. If you are going to take a job just to go on maternity leave in 6 months' time - it is YOU who is being unethical by not disclosing the intent at the time of the interview.

This is unethical and illegal. Prabha, if you can reasonably prove that your demotion was due to your pregnancy and not your work performance, please confront your company. You may even consider legal action. I wish you all the luck in life and motherhood! God be with you.

Regards,
Arnab

Hi Rose,

I agree with jaspalsingh; we should also consider the employer's perspective. I believe that the lady who interviewed you conducted the interview in a professional manner. Please do not take it personally, but she could have framed her questions more indirectly.

Hi Prabha,

It is really unethical to do such things. If you can prove it, we can eradicate such behavior to prevent it from happening again.

Dear Rose,

The question is very much ethical and genuine. You may feel hurt, but please put yourself in the employer's shoes; then you will know the purpose of that question.

Suppose you recruit somebody for a crucial position and immediately after joining, she asks for maternity leave... just imagine what will be your reaction. Don't bring sex here. Even if the candidate is male and if I see any chance of him taking a leave (due to exams, marriage, etc.), I am sure I am not going to recruit him.

So, all is well here. Be professional, don't exaggerate the situation, and please don't give the issue a sexist angle.

Regards, Ajay

Dear Rose,

According to me, it's not an unethical question. Why? They must be looking for a candidate (female) who would be regular without taking leaves. The company's concerns lie with females, especially when they may have children. In such cases, they would require time off for 3-6 months (maternity leave), during which the company would need to find a substitute. This is why they are concerned at the pre-hiring stage.

Regards,
Amit

Wow! I am amazed at the different points of view on this question. The reality is that employers have to make the choice on who they consider will advance their business objectives with minimal interruptions and/or costs.

I'm thinking how I would have approached the issue. Let's see:

What are the factors in your family that are likely to impact on your work performance over the next year or so?

Can you tell me what are some of your personal and/or family goals and how they fit in with your career goals?

Explain your expectations of our company on work/family balance.

I think it goes without saying that tact is a key factor for HR practitioners. The same question can be construed as ethical or unethical depending on how it is put across.

I have an HR friend who now has the uphill task to regain the trust of her management team after she failed to disclose she was pregnant at the time she was being hired and had to take her leave less than a year after she got hired. In my experience, I have had to deal with issues related to handling employees' HIV/AIDS status, and it can get tricky if you do not make it clear that your concern is more about performance than stigmatizing or discriminating against an employee.

Soni.

Hi,

Yes, it is unethical to have a question like this in the interview. However, when an HR person is conducting your interview, whether male or female, they can ask any questions. It is not necessary that they ask you questions related to your profile; they can ask anything. The main purpose is to assess your stress levels and how well you handle stress and respond to questions.

I can share an incident where a student was asked by the HR panel if they had heard that their mother is a prostitute. In such situations, it is crucial to understand the candidate's reaction. The student replied, "If you heard that my mother is a prostitute, then the only customer is my father." This response shows how one should be mentally prepared for unexpected questions during an interview.

Therefore, it is essential to be mentally prepared for interviews and be ready to handle any question that may come your way.

Regards,
Rupal

Hi Rose,

I went through a similar experience sometime back. I went for an interview at Alps Management Consultants, and it was the most horrific experience I have had to date. The HR was a male, and he kept asking me the same question repeatedly - he inquired about when I was planning to get married and when I was planning to have kids. He continued pressurizing me to respond to that question. At the time, I was 23. Furthermore, he proceeded to criticize all the female employees, stating that, in his opinion, female employees can only perform well until they get married, after which they lose focus. I couldn't tolerate that behavior, so I left halfway through.

Regards,
Manju

So now I got to learn one thing, if you are married, planning to get married, have kids, etc. Do not fake your HR about it. And after 3-4 months of joining when the HR resists you taking leave for 3-4 months, threaten the HR both inside the company with legal action against harassment for maternity leave, and outside the company @#@$% the HR, and @#$#$$$.

Then maybe these HR will learn a lesson.

Hi,

Every position has certain requirements and constraints. I think they need to be informed well ahead of the interview process so that both parties involved can decide whether to proceed with the conditions for the respective position. This saves time and helps avoid situations that are not appreciated by anyone.

Thanks! S Kumar.

I do not know what sort of discrimination laws you have in India, but here in Australia, asking such a question is illegal. Similarly, interviewers may not ask questions about religious affiliations, sexual orientation, marital status, medical history, living arrangements, etc. None of those things have any bearing on whether a person can do the job as specified in the job description.

When a professional HR person interviews a candidate for a job, they seek to find out if the person has the skills, knowledge, and experience to fulfill the duties competently.

Sadly, merely having laws does not prevent it from happening. Unscrupulous employers will ask these questions knowing full well that you cannot do much about it if you need the job or lack the resources to take legal action. The problem being, of course, the ability to prove a case. Usually, there are no witnesses when the illegal question is asked, and the interviewer will deny having asked the question.

Saying that the company needs to ensure the person will stay merely to protect the investment in recruiting and training the new person is not a satisfactory defense for such an offensive and irrelevant question.

I would hope that our members here are far more professional and mindful of our obligations to treat ALL people fairly and judge them only on the skills and abilities they bring to our organizations.

Hi there,

Good points have been raised in this forum. I feel that questions should be asked in a diplomatic manner once the candidate is comfortable after a few minutes of healthy conversation. It might happen that the interviewer has the target of interviewing many candidates in a short time, hence asking such questions initially. However, such questions should be asked at the end after explaining the urgency and importance of the role in the organization. I am sure that all HR professionals ask long-term stability questions to all prospective candidates to ensure the selected employee will not take extended leave within a year.

It seems that HR professionals are under too much pressure, causing them to neglect their core skill set of creating a comfortable environment for people and listening to them.

I believe there is no harm in asking such questions during interviews, but it should be done in a proper manner. Nowadays, there are numerous cases in the corporate world where employers hire external agencies to obtain very detailed information about existing or prospective employees.

Thanks & Regards,

DN

Hi,

Here, all suggest that the question is relevant but asked in an irrelevant manner. OK, fine. Many suggest first to make the candidate comfortable and then ask the question. But what I mean to convey is, IS THERE A NEED TO ASK THE CANDIDATE PERSONALLY.

An application form of the company can be designed, and the question can be included with education, experience, and other details. In personal details, the sex, age, marital status can be asked from the candidate. But asking about kids is too much and not needed at all for HR. The HR here need not be so loyal to the company like a dog. They need to have common sense, which they are lacking here in India. Almost all who said that you need to see from the employer's point of view.

Here, the senseless HR are expecting that the female employees should not take maternity leave or other leaves, etc. OK. But if I give you a situation, what can you say about it?

Just think if you have any brain and reply to me.

You interview an unmarried female candidate and train her for about 3-4 months. During these 3-4 months, her parents or she herself fixes marriage. After 4 months, her marriage is fixed. Now, I guarantee at least she will go on marriage leave for a month, which would mean loss for the company. If you hesitate to give leave, she will kick your job and go, as at that time, marriage would be a priority rather than the job. So ultimately, you have to give her one month's leave. Then again, after marriage in about 2-3 months, her husband is shifting abroad or some other place, and she will give resignation and go. In another case, within a year, she may apply for maternity leave, which again would mean you, loyal HR, crying over the loss of company work.

So ultimately, there is a loss for the company of training her and paying her for whatever time she worked. But why the hell do you look at it as a loss? She worked for the period she was paid. And it's none of your business to poke into the personal matters of employees.

And many think that girls have a flair to join the company and take maternity leaves??????? Think from a different angle.

Don't know what will happen if the HR keeps asking something foolish and still term it as ethical.

I agree with Jaysree's opinion that it is a must for a recruiter to know the importance of the tenure of the newly hired person after a lot of struggles. The process of recruitment has become so tough that even if a recruiter misses a part of a day, the offered candidates may opt for different options.

One thing is for sure; the interviewer should have asked with a little bit of fun to avoid disappointment by the candidate. The candidates should be ready for taking and accepting more bold and straightforward questions considering the current employment situations in India.

Rajan 8)

I agree with Ravi!

About predictions for the future of candidates, why don't they ask, "How many times are you planning to get sick?", "How many relatives of yours are likely to get married in the next 6 months?", and "What are the probabilities of you meeting with an accident?"

The interviewer is free to have the candidate undergo a medical examination prior to the employment offer to see if she is pregnant. He can judge from the age and family history (mentioned in the application form) about her likelihood of getting pregnant. He may decide based on the report and judgment about hiring her. But there is no point in asking and offending her.

I have seen these flashy HRs in BPO thinking they are gods. I have experienced them asking questions like, "How did your father die?" and "Are you planning to separate from your joint family?"

I think there has to be more professionalism among HR professionals as well. Many things are not taught in the best of B-schools. That is known as common sense.

- Hiten

"I am shocked to know some HR do this, and many HR here support the unethical questions asked. If the HR thinks the question was ethical and valid and a prerequisite for the job, then why didn't she post it in the job description itself? Only candidates who are not planning to have kids in the next two years are eligible to apply."

"These HRs of BPO are like this only, they don't have any knowledge and do whatever their foreign clients ask them to do. Hence, BPO employees are also referred to as cyber coolies because of the work they do. SHAME SHAME on HR, that we have such HR. You better forget the interview experience and look for a good job, not in a BPO."

Hi,

As discussed by some other experienced professionals on the site, I do not think the question put forth to you had anything to do with ethics or no ethics. It was purely a concern for her because she might have had cases like this in the past, and she wants to ensure that it doesn't repeat itself. Yes, it could have been put in a better way, which she did not quite realize herself.

These things should not be of any concern to you, and one need not get emotional about such things. You have to look at a bigger perspective in life and not such minuscule things which will not get you anywhere. Ultimately, it's up to you what you think and whether you want to go ahead with this or not.

Regards,
Ankita

Unethical and illegal... no doubt in that....

You just cannot frame such kind of question... we are HR for goodness' sake... we are not filling in the blanks. If I had some bad experience in the past, it doesn't mean that I should start asking these kinds of questions. It would just show my incompetency for this job. We are HR, and we are the best when it comes to playing with words. There are a hundred ways to frame this question or present a point.

India, US, UK, Aus, Canada... almost all countries except some third-world countries follow equal employment opportunity. However, there is nothing wrong in informing the candidate before the interview about the do's and don'ts of the job.

Cheers and have fun.

Rose,

It is unethical, no doubt. The company may have 1001 reasons to justify themselves, but they are hiring humans and not machines. To get a job, we cannot force ourselves to our personal values. I don't think anyone should be justifying the question. Things are getting too commercial these days, and these recruiters are forced to ask such questions. But the person concerned should have some common sense to decide which questions to ask and which to avoid. Sounds really ABSURD!!

Dear Rose,

This is an ethical question. If she selects you, she will provide additional training and expect you to implement the same in your work. If you decide to join or undergo the training and then take a leave, it will not be beneficial as the company has invested a significant amount in your training.

This question emphasizes the importance of considering long-term commitment to work without taking extended leaves.

Regards,
Shan

Dear All,

It is not wrong for the recruiter to know the future plans of their applicants and find out their interest or weightage for the work. The question seems to be unethical. She must have asked in a different manner. If we highlight such kind of issues, it would be better for the applicants.

Wow. I am surprised that so many here feel that the question was unethical. Why do we choose to forget, at our own convenience, that a company's business model is primarily to make money? When they hire a resource who would be taking a maternity leave before she can "bill" for an organization, it puts them in a spot. Why should the organization invest in someone who hasn't been productive and won't be for a while? It's absolutely correct to ask this question. Get a grip.

Rose,

It is unethical, no doubt. The company may have 1001 reasons to justify themselves, but they are hiring humans and not machines. To get a job, we cannot force ourselves to abandon our personal values. I don't think anyone should be justifying the question. Things are getting too commercial these days, and these recruiters are forced to ask such questions, but the person concerned should have some common sense to decide which questions to ask and which to avoid. It sounds really ABSURD!

Typically, this entire rise in human resources is heavily complemented by the onsite-offshore concept, primarily outsourcing. Where is the humanity then? Hypocrisy is convenient, no doubt. I hope you get the drift.

I think she was wrong in the manner she asked the question. We usually ask this just to confirm if the employee would require some long leave after joining. I feel asking this in a proper manner is not unethical.

Thanks

Jasmine

And by the way, can all of you who said it should have been put forth in a more politically correct fashion give us some examples? In a sentence, without getting verbose :D

Dear Rose,

I don't see anything unethical in that question; in fact, it's quite professional to understand the candidate better before hiring her. It's just about knowing/understanding the seriousness of the candidate regarding her career. There are ladies who take up a convenient job sometimes at organizations which are lenient about these issues, just as a stop-gap arrangement to keep themselves occupied. I don't want to be gender-biased, but looking from the organization's perspective, the job does suffer when someone goes on long leave. The only thing is that she should have worded her question more appropriately and in a polite way.

Kavita

I agree with your reply, Rose, on this question.

The question should have been asked in a different way. There is nothing such as ethical or unethical in asking this question.

It is also important for an organization to understand the commitment of the candidate being recruited for a crucial position.

~ Nikita

Dear Rose,

The question asked is out of concern, but the way the interviewer asked the question is not right.

You may look at it this way...when you interview a person...you do ask, what is his/her salary expectation and why he/she feels he deserves the said amount. If you ask the same question in this fashion, it is okay...but if you ask the candidate...why the hell do you think the company should pay you the said amount...the question becomes offensive.

I believe the interviewer might have had tough times with employees in the HR department taking maternity leaves/long leaves and work getting affected. And she might have asked you this question with the issues in the back of her mind.

It's just that the way she asked the question which is incorrect. As an interviewer, you ask questions like plans for higher studies, plans for marriage, etc., as they may affect the organization. Don't feel offended by the way she has asked the question. She might have wanted to be on the safer side in recruiting new employees.

Regards,

Arun.

Hi all,

I would also like to share my experience in the same regard. Just a few days ago, I had an interview with a company, and the HR person asked me the same question. She explained that the reason behind it was that she did not want their new employees to take long leaves, at least for the first two years. This kind of experience is quite common for those looking to change jobs, and it can be very difficult to decide whether it's ethical or unethical.

Regards,
Rachana

Hi Rose,

I'm glad that you have come to the conclusion that the question was not all that unethical! I also agree with you that the same question could have been presented in a different and more diplomatic manner. It is evident that the management and the HR responsible for recruitment do not wish to hire individuals who are pregnant or planning to have a child in the near future, as they would be investing money in the candidate for the benefit of the organization. This practice raises ethical concerns in terms of social compliance, as candidates should not be questioned about this matter. However, recruiters can navigate this issue delicately by inquiring about the candidate's family planning intentions or pregnancy status in a respectful manner that does not offend the candidate. By gathering this information discreetly, recruiters can then make informed decisions on offering or declining the job opportunity.

Best,
Srinaren

Hi all,

I was also asked the same question in the current company's interview as the person who was previously taking care of the responsibilities had to move to Paris, and thus she wanted a person who should be able to manage and take over the things without any hassle. I didn't find it unethical because if I would have been in her place, I would have also wanted the same kind of person, honestly.

In your case, as you said, the way she reacted might be embarrassing for you, but it doesn't sound unethical. So not to worry at all, dear!

Dear Ms. Rose George,

Many BPOs are even promoting a weirder concept that has evolved recently, which you might also be aware of; "DINKS" (Double Income No Kids). For any recently married couple with no kids who wish to join the company, they promote this concept very tactfully during the interview by proposing a highly attractive salary to both husband and wife with the required qualifications and experience. In return, they demand assurance from them that they will not opt for children for the next 2-5 years. Getting carried away with this lucrative offer, the couples do accept the offer in 8-9 out of 10 cases.

Now tell me, who is at fault? The top management, HR, or the interviewees themselves?

Thank you.

I read the discussion. I want to add to the topic that is "ethical and unprofessional question." Then please Jayashree answer my straight question: If any lady is hired and she has joined the company, she does have some responsibilities. After being trained and deployed onto a project, by God's blessings, she has to take maternity leave. Then, is this ethical? Understanding the responsibilities she is holding, she just moved, leaving a huge cost burden on the company to hire another person to fill the position. If this is ethical, then that is also ethical. Please don't only see it from an ethics point of view. Yes, I agree that HR could have handled this question more tactfully. But understand their point of view too. If they say anything beyond this, then I too agree that it is unethical.

To All,

In the U.S., any questions regarding pregnancy plans, childcare arrangements, or any similar question regarding applicant intentions to use FMLA leave in the future is not legal under both the Family Medical Leave Act and The Americans with Disabilities Acts. Note this is in the U.S. only and not the country the original question is about. Each country sets its own regulations, values, mores, and standards of ethics.

Additionally, in the U.S., the Acts above change once an applicant is hired. Under FMLA, the employee is required to give up to 30 days advanced notice (pregnancy - father or mother) before taking leave or may be terminated. However, the Pregnancy Act of 1998 extends protection to pregnant women from termination for a defined period after birth, but not fathers. At this point, the ADA protects parents from termination as discriminatory, depending upon the specific situation as listed in the Act. As always, you should contact an attorney who specializes in employment law in these matters (e.g., asking a divorce lawyer is like asking a podiatrist to perform open heart surgery).

So to answer the original question, is the question unethical? In the U.S., it is not only unethical but also illegal. In the country where the job is... probably not, unless it is an American employer operating in that country.

Hello members,

With due respect to the views of the members, let us examine the legal aspect regarding the Maternity Benefit Act, 1960. Let's take a look at sub-section (1) of section 4 of the Act:

"4. Employment of, or work by women prohibited during certain periods

(1) No employer shall knowingly employ a woman in any establishment during the six weeks immediately following the day of her delivery, miscarriage, or medical termination of pregnancy."

Based on the above provision of the law, I believe that since it was a telephonic interview and the interviewer could not see the candidate in person, it may be reasonable for an employer to inquire about her confinement. However, from the wording used, it appears that the employer did not ask the question from a legal standpoint but from other perspectives, as indicated by almost every member. This suspicion was further confirmed when the same question was repeated for the second time, which certainly proved it to be an unethical question.

Best wishes,

jpratap

Great comments...

Sometimes the choice of words, manner, and tone could simply get outrageous. In others, the person at the other end might have a 'fortified' opinion of himself/herself that might make him/her ask such questions and not even apologize for it. I have seen this many times in the call centers that keep calling me. They tend to sound like orders, although they are classically meant to be requests! We are fostering this culture, but it's great to see people who are concerned about maintaining the standards at the societal level.

But this should not be mixed up with the cardinal issue: Availability of the employee. I am sure you have seen this with several organizations - employees being denied long leaves. In the case of maternity leave, the organization cannot react as 'badly' as with other situations - there is a kind of legal protection for the employee. But all said, this cannot be a criterion or a question to ask. No one can predict an emergency requiring leaves. Although pregnancies are predictable, it is a personal decision. The employer can express the need for continued availability over the next 6-9 months or so. All said, it cannot be a criterion to start with! Being a business owner, I can appreciate the business perspective, but I don't think I would worry too much about it to start with!

Let me ask another question: Most HR pros insist that they offer employees a career and not a job! How many employees really spend their lifetime in the company? Not too many - attrition occurs everywhere.

Hi All,

I have gone through this experience probably 80% of the time when I have faced interviews. When I was unmarried, they used to ask me questions about my marriage plans. And now, they ask me about my family plan. It's a very straightforward question, and I think most female members will agree with me that they must have faced such questions. With one of the top MNCs, I had like 5 rounds of interviews, and every time the focus was mainly on my family plan rather than my competencies. Whenever I prepare for an interview, I always prepare myself for such types of questions.

Rose, I think the differences between males and females are still present in our society, and we have to bear it and try to make the coming years better.

Prerna

Dear Prerna,

True, this question is asked many times in interviews, but you will find that the majority of interviewers asking this question are women themselves. It is not the men but the women who perpetuate gender bias.

Moving on to the next aspect, if you are asked this question in an interview, you should instantly know that you are not being interviewed for a good company. Maybe big, but not necessarily good!

Nowadays, good companies have various tools to deal with different aspects of life. If I may say, a successful company always has a good work-life balance policy in place. Working from home, telecommuting, nursery facilities, daycare facilities, etc., are various measures available to make pregnancy a happy, enriching experience and not a roadblock in career progression.

I guess most women should treat this question as a warning signal for choosing the right place to work.

Regards,
Team GroupHR

Hi Rose,

For you, the question was a little better. One of my friends went to an interview. She had her engagement just a few days ago. She cleared all her rounds and was waiting for the response.

One fine day, she called the company and asked about the feedback. She was not considered, and the reply was, "You are going to get married, and naturally, you will be conceived within a year or so, and we do not want a new hire to go on leave so soon."

From the candidate's view:

1. The HR didn't even bother to ask whether she is planning to have a kid (as you said in an ethical manner); they themselves made the decision.
2. She missed the good opportunity as she was in need of a job desperately and was actually planning not to have kids recently.
3. Getting married is not her fault.
4. Since her fiancée is not earning so much, she wanted to have a job to run her family. But her plan collapsed.

Where the HR lacked:

1. The HR should at least have asked the candidate (if at all they had shortlisted her) as in Rose's case whether she will not take leave for the next one year or so. Communication problem, that too from HR.
2. If they are desperately looking for a candidate who should not take leave within a short span of time, they should have mentioned clearly in the advertisement only male candidates can apply. No forecast.

Future advertisements from companies (in a lighter moment):

Only Bachelors can apply.
A Landlord who is willing to work in shifts as time pass and has no intention of money can only apply.
If you have a kid, please bring a certificate that your spouse is not working and is a homemaker. Moreover, if you have more than one kid, please confirm that you are in a joint family.

Regards,
Periaswamy K

@Ngurjar, I agree that the views of one person may not be representative, but what if all the married girls are being categorized based on their plans to have kids. My opinion is that it is a norm in India. To give you a tangible example, my sister was fired from the best-known public school in Delhi just because she was about to have a baby. Although she got a fatter pay after her pregnancy was over, the whole period of pregnancy was fraught with uncertainty and disbelief.

Regards,
Team GroupHR