Facing Workplace Gossip and Backstabbing: How Can I Address This Without Resigning?

Dear Senior,

I am currently working as an HR Executive in one of the IT companies. For the past year, I have been facing a situation where my colleagues consistently backstab me. They use abusive language when referring to me and spend hours gossiping about me behind my back. I only recently discovered this behavior, and it has left me feeling very disheartened.

I am seeking advice on how to handle this situation. I do not wish to resign and allow these actions to continue with any future HR personnel who may come after me. Please advise me on the best course of action to address this issue effectively. Your guidance would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you.

"The only reason people talk behind your back is because you're already ahead of them."

"No one can hurt you without your permission."

Somewhere in their heart, they know (or maybe they don't know) that you are a better person, but they still try to speak of your weaknesses or negative things to get attention or followers, from people who are also jealous of you or your achievements, or from people who also hate you. There will always be people who will hate you or be jealous of you, no matter how great or good you are.

Is It Really Worth It?

Before all this, ask yourself: Is it really worth it? It’s got to make sense now! If it doesn't, it’s not worth fighting with such people. It’s not easy to just let somebody put you down. Don’t take it if you think the person is not worth it. But you won’t know who is worth it and who isn’t until you try.

So try talking it out with them, and if it doesn't work out, remember the first rule: you don’t have to waste your time and energy thinking about what worthless people think about you! But trying to sort it out will save you from regretting it later. You’ll have the satisfaction that you did your bit to clear the problem.

Question the Loyalty

Question the loyalty of the person who tells you someone is talking behind your back. And why is he/she so concerned about you? Can you trust this person?

Walk it off. Go home, take a bath, listen to relaxing music, turn off your phone, and take a nap.

The best reaction is not to react at all. They will do it for some time, and when they do not see any reactions, they will move on.

You can see one of my answers on Quora that will help you find a solution to all your problems:

https://www.quora.com/What-psycholog...__filter__=all

Cheer up!

I am also of the opinion that you must reconfirm or recheck whatever you have learned from your well-wisher. It may be possible that the person is trying to demotivate you. In that case, you should be happy because it shows that you are doing your job better than your well-wisher could. If your well-wisher is genuine, then you need to sort this out through discussion. Try to find out what really went wrong and why these negative perceptions about you have been generated.

"Tree that bears the sweetest fruits gets the maximum number of stones."

Dear Riya,

What someone speaks behind your back is something you cannot change, come what may. The people who speak behind you do so for a reason - they cannot find fault in your work or processes. So, the grapevine.

As far as the bosses and the management are concerned, they are not a part of this grapevine, so you need not worry. However, if the boss or the management is also a party to this back talk, then please, find a job for yourself and leave them behind.