Hi Jitesh,
Welcome to the site! :)
I am a regular traveler on the same Virar-Churchgate route that you have studied. So, I decided to take a look at the research to assist you. Here are my observations:
1. You have referred to the Mumbai railway system as the "Metro Rail System." The term Metro typically denotes an underground or subway system, which is not present in Mumbai but is available in cities like Delhi and Kolkata.
2. In the introduction, specifically bullet point 1, you mentioned understanding the behavior of people. It may be challenging to grasp this solely by studying the Mumbai Railway system. Mumbai is not only diverse in a secular sense but also in various other aspects. A comprehensive study should include areas beyond Virar to Churchgate, such as Bandra, Andheri, Borivali, Dadar, and even the Central Suburbs like Vashi and Mulund. Focusing solely on the behavior of consumers in the Virar to Churchgate area might not be sufficient. Hence, it would be advisable to remove those statements.
3. Could you please provide your definition of "Living Patterns"?
4. The introduction mentions understanding different market segments and its usefulness for marketers launching products in the region. However, the research seems to focus only on cell phones. Therefore, it might be beneficial to narrow down the scope to include only cell phones.
5. When discussing the density and cost per square foot, terms like "greater" or "lesser" are subjective. It would be helpful to provide a specific range for clarity.
6. Consider including a section on potential improvements to the existing railway infrastructure by the authorities. Avoid delving too deeply into details to maintain focus on the research.
7. In the "Defense of the Model" section, elaborate more on Mumbai being a commercial capital with a large English-speaking population. Providing statistics on Mumbai's contribution to the country, its population as per the 2001 census, and estimates can strengthen your points. Additionally, including statistics on the traveling population in the Virar-Churchgate belt would add credibility.
8. While the Mumbai Railway System generates significant revenue for the administration, specifying the exact figures would enhance the statement's objectivity. Including a brief history of the Mumbai Rail System with statistics on past and current traveler populations could aid in estimating the city's population growth.
9. In the Methodology section, if Bhayander is being considered a station between Virar and Borivali, clarify the reason for mentioning it.
10. Define the "peak hours" for travel towards Churchgate and Virar. Sharing estimates based on personal experience and observations can strengthen your analysis.
11. Refute the claim that students mainly travel between Borivali and Dadar without supporting data. Consider incorporating data to support your arguments.
12. Challenge the assertion that women's presence is predominantly cosmopolitan, providing statistics or studies to back up your claims.
13. Clarify if the increased usage of First Class compartments is between Virar-Borivali or after. Specify your observations to support this statement.
14. Instead of using "rural class," consider employing the SEC classification for better clarity.
15. Acknowledge the city's infrastructure challenges and population shifts to regions like Navi Mumbai and Pune. Include relevant government efforts and statistics to support your observations.
16. Provide examples to illustrate the unsafe conditions on trains and the prevalence of corruption within the railway system. Supporting your claims with statistics will enhance credibility.
17. Highlight the presence of uneducated and malnourished children on trains, emphasizing the need for urgent attention to their welfare.
18. In Table 4, 5, 6, 7, reconsider the LR/HR/VHR classification and opt for the SEC classification for accuracy.
I hope this detailed feedback is helpful. Feel free to reach out if you require further assistance with your research.
Regards,
Vinisha