Is It Okay to Give Feedback on an Interviewer Who Crossed Personal Boundaries?

Greetings everyone!

Query: Can an Interviewee Give Feedback About the Interviewer?

I attended an interview where, unfortunately, the interviewer was getting too personal. She's our neighbors' relative, as I later found out. She also admitted that she knows me, my address, and that she has been to our locality many times before.

As soon as I entered the room, she pointed to the address on my resume and said, "Oh! You live there... It's near the school, right?"

The interviewer kept asking personal questions for about 20 minutes, making me really uncomfortable. The questions were quite irrelevant. For instance, she asked, "How many pets do you have?" "How many rabbits have you had?" "What can you do for your sister?" "What is your sister doing?" "What does your father do?" "In which business?" "What is the name of his company?" "Where is your father's office located?" "Which phone do you have?"

When I replied that I have a Samsung phone, she rolled her eyes and smiled very mischievously.

She yawned throughout the interview without covering her face. Sometimes, I felt like yawning in reaction but managed to control it. Then, she asked, "Why are you low on energy?" (It was because she kept yawning repeatedly). This made me feel even more uncomfortable, and I lost interest in the interview.

Unsurprisingly, I was rejected and lost the opportunity.

Now, I want to write to her that it's not right to judge a candidate based on presumptions, prejudices, and jealousies. She should not mix professional life with personal matters. I also want to cc her boss on the email to make him aware of what is happening.

Respected seniors, please let me know if it is legal to write such an email. Can she take any legal action against me? Does a candidate have the right to respond?

P.S. - I come from a financially strong family, and we live in a spacious house. Most of the neighbors are jealous and often plot against us (although they haven't been able to harm us due to my father's influence). I was not surprised by her behavior, but I do not find it right.

Regards

I have gone through your query and the answers with deep interest and analyzed your query again. As I have also had my share of bad interviews during my job hunting, I had not worked myself up to the extent of having to give negative feedback. So, I searched the web as my wont and found some sound advice at Should a candidate ever give a company feedback on its hiring process?.

As others have noted, I wonder whether your sound financial background and living in a big house, etc., are relevant for the query. I also wonder whether your personal situation has influenced your perception of the situation.

Thank you so much for the frequent replies and really constructive suggestions. I request you all not to focus on the last two sentences but the overall meaning of the query.

Reasons for Mentioning My Financial Status

1. I've spoken to some of my friends earlier about the issue, and they asked, "Why do you think she was biased towards you?" I wanted all of you to be aware of my situation as I faced prejudice mainly because of my status.

2. I expected reverse queries from learned experts to explain it in depth, such as why a neighbor's relative would do that. So, I tried to justify it beforehand.

3. The interviewer had a materialistic inclination, as was clear from the type of questions she asked. She rolled her eyes when I said I have a Samsung phone, as she expected it to be an iPhone. Moreover, she herself asked me about my address at the very beginning of the interview to ensure if I'm that girl.

4. I wanted to make the query clearer to all of you. It was an intentional act; I'm not bragging or anything. That's why I mentioned it in "P.S." and made my query anonymous.

Now, I am quite certain that my status was actually a reason for her being biased towards me, as it's visible in most of the responses here. Nearly all the respondents focused on the last sentences only; probably it's a human tendency. Had I not mentioned the 'wealth and influence,' the responses would have been totally different.

I expected someone to suggest to me about the interviewer asking personal questions for 20 minutes and making me too uncomfortable to stay there. Still, I'm not clear on what to do next. 

Anyhow, thank you so much.

Warm Regards

http://rishikajain.com/2015/08/19/in...he-black-spot/

I wonder whether you accessed, read, and digested the contents at the website I gave a link to. Many times, we do not realize that it's our perception of the situation that causes the problem.

Interview Techniques and Perception

When I was unemployed for a while, I attended a course on interview techniques. One of the tutors said that when we get a chance, we have to exploit the situation. For example, when an interviewee went with a Rolex watch, the interviewer asked him what watch he had. The interviewee took that opportunity and discussed his watch, mentioning it looked like the interviewer's watch. More time was spent discussing watches and their merits, and the guy got the job.

Sometimes, instead of responding to questions, we start reacting based on our perception of the situation. We get annoyed at the questions asked, rather than diverting the attention of the interviewer to something relevant to the job. However, as freshers, we may not have the experience that people who already have a job do.

Handling Low Energy Perceptions

If I were you, when the interviewer asked why you are low on energy at that stage of the interview, I would have said, "Yawning is contagious, I am told, and that causes one to perceive the other as low in energy."

Advice on Giving Feedback

The simple answer to your query is not to bother giving unsolicited feedback. It's not worth it. You never know where the person who interviewed you will move to. Suppose you get a job in another organization, and the person to whom you tried to give advice moves to that firm, what will be the situation?

Please read the material in the link that I provided, sleep over it, and then decide what you think is right.

Regards

Thank you for the meaningful insights. Yes, I have gone through the link you shared, and I'm convinced not to write any email now. I am leaving everything to the 'Law of Karma' because I still have a feeling that she just wasted an opportunity intentionally. When she asked why I am low on energy, I replied, "Probably it's because of my voice pitch that I'm sounding low on energy. But, I think it's a very feminine trait." (Because I have a very thin voice and a very low voice pitch.) I too wanted to say the same thing but thought that she might find it offensive, so I turned it on my voice pitch. I smiled 2-3 times during the interview, then she, in a very rude tone, said, "Why do you smile again and again?" I said, "Ma'am, it's my habit. I smile often." Then she said, "Okay, it relaxes you!"

Thank you for your time, sir...

Regards

Dear Sir,

What you have written makes eminent sense. Never render unsolicited advice.

It reminds me of an earlier incident where, during an interview conducted by me, a highly qualified teacher decided to display her knowledge by shooting questions to the interview panel instead of showing how she was suitable for the teacher's post, which was vacant.

She showed an attitude that was wholly unwelcome. It is not only mere qualifications that can get you a job, but your attitude also matters a lot.

Surprisingly, the appreciate button is missing, hence the reply.

Regards