Torn Between Staying and Leaving: How to Decide When Your Resignation Causes a Stir

The issue seems to be loaded with emotions apart from economics. Initially, I thought of not venturing to offer even a view, let alone advice, considering the situation you are in, thinking that you are the best person to judge. However, I mustered some courage to share a few feelings of mine on the dilemma you are caught in, thinking that it may clear some clouds of confusion in you.

As I observed life, when we started our journey, we might have found ourselves stranded many times at moments when we were caught between two choices—whether it is as simple as buying a chocolate of this brand or that brand to as important as studying engineering or medicine, and then whether to go for marketing or HR in MBA, and finally to opt for a public sector or private sector job. It goes on endlessly. Therefore, do not get perturbed by these dilemmas in life; they are part of life’s journey. We nevertheless made those choices in the past after deliberating on them with parents, friends, teachers, and well-wishers. I felt that you referred your dilemma now to this forum since you too want to deliberate on it to get some help to give some clarity to your confusion. It is this that made me throw some light on the issue.

If the choice is between good and bad, there is no difficulty in making a choice, because everyone chooses the good. If the choice is between a greater evil and a lesser evil, then also it is not difficult to make a choice, since everyone chooses the lesser evil. However, if the choice is between two good options, it is difficult to make a choice, but life does not allow you to keep decisions pending and compels you to make a choice.

There is no denying the fact that it will be painful to leave an organization which you have nurtured from its infancy and brought up to the stage where it can stand on its feet. However, the relationship between an employee and the organization is unique in that it is governed by both emotional and economic factors like compensation, self-esteem, career prospects, job satisfaction, and organizational culture, etc. The relationship is said to be growing on healthy lines if the employee and the organization complement each other as partners in progress. The relationship is said to be souring if the employee and the organization grow at the cost of each other. An employee needs to sustain or sever the relationship after evaluating it in terms of the above factors that regulate the relationship.

In my view, therefore, a cost-benefit analysis of this relationship with regard to your future in terms of the factors stated above vis-à-vis both the organizations on the following lines can be of help to you to take a call.

1) **Durability**: Which one is the horse for the long race?

2) **Compensation**: What is offered by both for the future and the limitations, if any?

3) **Self-esteem**: Which of the two is in a better position to satisfy your self-esteem needs like recognition, acknowledgment as a partner in progress, and rewards in the long run? As money is not always a motivating factor, you need to evaluate the factor of compensation against other factors like self-esteem, self-actualization needs, and learning opportunities, etc., to give a realistic weightage to the factor of compensation.

4) **Growth**: Which one offers you better opportunities in terms of building new competencies, new avenues of learning, expanding your vision, etc.?

5) **Organizational Culture**: Which one has a better culture that promotes mutual respect, mutual progress, gratitude, and no politics?

You can also include any other factor for evaluation which you feel has a bearing on the relationship, like trust, etc.

Before I conclude, I recall a story which I read in some magazine. The story goes like this: There was a pilot flying a helicopter. He realized that there was some problem with the engine. Before the chopper would crash, he fixed the parachute to himself and jumped out of it, only to land on a tree. Since it was night and dark, he decided to spend the night on the top of the tree. As dawn broke out (in the morning), he saw a man passing below the tree and asked him, “Can you please tell me where I am?” The man looked up the tree and told the pilot, “You are on the top of the tree.” The pilot on the tree asked him, “Are you a lecturer?” Exclaiming, the man below said, “Yes, how did you know?” The pilot replied, “Because what you said is right, but it is of no use to me.”

Like the lecturer in the story, I said what I felt was right, and it is for you to evaluate it.

Regards,
B.Saikumar

In-House HR & IR advisor