Feeling Stuck at Work: How Do I Handle a Controlling Boss and Lack of Job Satisfaction?

I'm facing a typical situation at my workplace that has been bothering me very often and not allowing me to get any job satisfaction or fulfillment.

Background and Current Situation

I joined my current organization in April 2012 in office administration as a senior executive. This is a big Indian MNC and a company of good repute. However, after working here for a year, I have noticed that the working atmosphere is full of office politics, ego clashes, poor management, lack of transparency, ambiguity in policies and procedures, and other similar issues.

Concerns with Immediate Boss

My most important area of concern is the selfish behavior of my immediate boss. He handles all the work, both important and not-so-important tasks, leaving me idle most of the time. He wants to keep complete control over all the facilities and tasks. There is no information sharing from his side, but he demands daily updates from us, so information only flows in one direction—from us to him. He encourages me not to care much about others, to offer negligible support, and to delay support where needed. This is his way of avoiding too much work pressure and delaying tasks to the extent that employees prefer self-help over seeking support from Admin. He is diplomatic and knows how to manage situations by any means necessary. He doesn't care much about junior subordinates, especially lower-grade outsourced staff, and believes they should be reprimanded even for minor mistakes, though his behavior with me is fine.

Impact on My Role and Experience

I was previously managing a small office independently and have around 8 years of experience in office administration. However, here I feel demoted in terms of job profile, though my salary is fine. I have become an idle person, totally dependent on my boss, unable to take even small actions independently. I often spend 10 hours in the office sitting idle with no work to look forward to. I get scolded if I take any initiative to help or support others. My boss's ideology is to act smart, play politics, maneuver, pretend to be supportive but offer minimal support, provide delayed support if any, and escape through diplomatic answers. He encourages me to lie indirectly, be diplomatic, act according to the situation, and never provide fast, direct, and prompt support to anyone, except a few selected top management people.

Desire for Change and Challenges

I'm now fed up with this work culture and want a change, though I still want to continue working with this company as it's reputable and the office is close to my residence. I have spoken to my boss a few times, but his approach suggests that he cares only about his own professional growth and is not interested in seeing me take on any responsibilities. That's why he keeps me in the dark regarding most admin tasks and handles them himself.

I also considered talking to my boss's boss, the Admin Head, but there's a risk that this could backfire if the super boss shares my conversation with my boss, who might then retaliate. I even thought of approaching HR, but I'm unsure how they would handle it, as any damage to my boss's ego could make him very offensive towards me.

Seeking Guidance

I actually want to continue with this company, and the ideal situation would be if my branch location, project, or current boss is changed. How this can happen is yet to be imagined. With my current boss, I doubt if things can change because he is unlikely to change himself for me.

I seek guidance from all HR and admin experts, or people who have faced a similar situation, so that I can prepare my strategy for further action and act accordingly. I have made this write-up long to provide a clear understanding of my situation and hope to get reasonable solutions. Please feel free to ask if you need any further clarifications regarding my situation.

Thanks in advance.

A very clear and well-laid-out description of the situation. Firstly, where are you located—Hong Kong? Next, you seem to be in a dilemma—you want to work in this company yet are unable to take things lying down any longer. Rather than focusing on the 'how' or 'why' or 'what' of your situation, let's focus on what you mentioned as the possible solutions: '...ideal situation can be if my branch location, project, or current boss is changed'.

To consider the last option first (changing your current boss), that seems to be wishful thinking, based on what you mentioned. So forget about it.

Coming to 'changing branch location or project', what's your perception about the possibility of either of these happening? If you think it's possible, but it needs to be probed further to check out the probability, suggest focusing in that direction.

Without getting too involved or exposed, make 'discreet' inquiries about both the options—'discreet' for obvious reasons. Your next steps (what to do and how to go about it and when) will depend on the result of this. If you have already checked this angle out, please give the details.

When it comes to changing this job for another one, suggest thinking of it as the worst-case scenario (last resort).

All the best.

Regards, TS

It seems to me that your boss is nothing but a control freak! He cannot give up any sort of control and cannot delegate.

Considerations for Addressing Control Issues

Is he a perfectionist? As he cannot even give up minor tasks, he may be thinking that work by others may not be up to his standard.

Does he feel threatened by you (or others), hence his behaviors?

I believe that it is time to have a heart-to-heart chat with him (I know you have had several chats); but try this approach:

Take him out for a coffee/drink so that the ambiance is relaxed and not distracted by the office. Tell him that your first and foremost concern is that he could be facing "burnout" due to all his hard work and that you are here to support and relieve him of his pressures. Make this conversation all about him and slightly massage his ego. Do NOT talk about office politics, his attitude, lack of support, pretensions, etc. These issues will be dealt with later, though you may have to agree with him regarding all that you find abhorrent (for the time being). The idea behind this is for you to convince him that you are on HIS side and that he can trust you.

Once you have managed this, then tackle the other issues one by one and step by step. There is no quick fix; it will take time. I suggest this only because it seems to me that you really wish to continue with the company.

Approaching Higher Management and HR

You should only approach the super boss as a last resort because he is probably quite close to him, and there will be repercussions as the super boss will be obliged to talk to your boss, and he may not put his point across effectively.

There is a danger if you go to HR. While HR is there to resolve workplace issues, they are ultimately there to manage the human resource. If they think that the boss is able to manage the workload and is coping with it, they will have to consider if keeping you is a cost they can do without. You might just be giving them ammunition to resolve an issue. Instead, put suggestions forward to HR to improve the office. Coming from HR will be more effective than coming from you.

Apart from that, I agree with TS.

I wish you well in this difficult situation, particularly as you yourself are a senior executive.

Regards,
Harsh

I can understand what you are going through. I would suggest two things initially:

1. Make a list of what is within your control and what is not in your control in this problematic scenario.
2. Do you want to change this job considering its positives (such as closeness to home)?

Top Concerns

What would be your top concerns? Here is how I see it:

1. Waste of time due to no work given.
2. Office politics.
3. His rude behavior.

Sir, you cannot change numbers 2 and 3: his behavior and attitude. The only person you can change is yourself. You could try simply smiling when he suggests you behave wrongly, and over time he will get the point.

Time is being wasted not only because he is not assigning you work (which you have no control over), but your time utilization is also in your hands, isn't it?

Having said that, do you think you could relook at this same situation as a "learning leave"? A paid holiday for one year? Why not utilize this time to build yourself rather than lament.

Thank you.

In this company, we have several branches in Delhi/NCR, and senior management makes decisions on where to place employees based on work requirements. There is a possibility to move to another branch or project under a different manager. However, it's a management decision based on their understanding of the situation and needs. I am unsure how I can access this information or whom to approach regarding this matter. I appreciate the suggestions from TS and Harish and have already begun considering my options. I am trying to figure out how to gather this information and would appreciate any tips that anyone may have.

Regarding speaking candidly with my boss, I agree that it is a good idea and I plan to do so soon.

I welcome additional suggestions from other senior colleagues. I want to express my sincere gratitude to TS and Harish for their valuable suggestions, which were detailed and specific in terms of actionable steps. I truly appreciate your help.

Regarding changing to another department/division/branch, since you say that there are many branches all over Delhi/NCR, I suggest adopting the following strategy.

You are right that such shifts/transfers are a management decision.

Since you have been in this company for over a year, you must be aware, to some extent at least, about the bosses in the various branches. Identify the one(s) whom you think will invite you if the transfer does take place.

And if such person(s) don't really get along with your boss, all the better (sometimes, 'your enemy's enemy is your friend' does work out well, even outside politics).

Now, instead of moving your interest to get the transfer/shift from your end through your boss/HR, I suggest speaking confidentially to the boss of the branch where you feel you would be welcome—that you are keen to work under him/her. Many times, those in positions of power take it upon themselves to initiate action to get those in whom they are interested under their fold. Obviously, your boss will get to know of it since he will need to be consulted and give his approval at some stage in the whole process. You can then take a stand on it that you are okay with it.

Hope you get the point.

All the best.

Regards,
TS

Thank you very much for your suggestions, but it's not purely learning that I'm having to do. In office situations, it's not possible to be in complete learning mode. Whatever learning I could possibly do online, I have already been doing for the last year. Now, I need to take up responsibilities to keep myself in business.

Hi TS, I appreciate your logical suggestions and will try to be on the lookout for such opportunities. I did get your point. 