Dear Pawankumar, Our senior members M/S Raghunathan, Jacob, and Manish Srivastava have given very useful practical tips for improving your communication skills. I would request you to put them into regular and systematic practice.
Understanding Communication
Few more thoughts in this connection from my own perspective. Simply speaking, communication means conveying our own feelings or thoughts to others in such a way that makes them understand, if not exactly, at least most approximately what we feel or think. To understand the subtle nuances of communication, both verbal and non-verbal, we should first realize that the purpose of communication is connecting ourselves with the world at large in the right perspective, because perceptions are always at variance due to individual differences.
The Challenge of Oral Communication
Oral communication is particularly difficult because it is always an extempore action or reaction. So, the basic tenet of communication is effective listening, as suggested by Mr. Srivastava. Listening does not mean the mere physical act of hearing. On the contrary, it is a systematic process of assimilation that ends up in conscious response. Generally, we listen halfway only, and our listening is not always total or complete.
One day, Mulla Nazirud-din returned home very late. His wife asked for the reason, and Nazirud-din, like any other latecomers, answered that it was late. She became wild because of this answer as it strengthened her suspicion that Nazirud-din had some illicit extramarital connection. She searched him thoroughly but found nothing, warning him not to come home so late in the future.
The very next day, Mulla was late again. Fueled by her suspicion, his wife asked irrelevant questions, checked his clothes thoroughly, and found a long hair, presuming it to be that of a lady's, and thrashed him. The following day, Mulla was late once more, taking precautions not to have any foreign objects on his clothes. His wife found nothing but started crying. Mulla asked her why she was crying, and she shouted back, revealing her misunderstanding.
Effective Listening and Expression
When you listen, listen totally without superimposing your own prejudicial reactionary thoughts. Only then will you be able to understand and respond accordingly. Next, don't be obsessed with language. After all, language is just a vehicle of expression. Always remember that 'the expressed' is more important than 'the expression'.
Imagine you are not comfortable with flawless English and you are in New York in dire need of boarding a bus to Madison Square. A bus arrives. Will you ask the American standing beside you, pointing to the bus, "GOING TO MADISON SQUARE?" or start recalling grammatical formations? Please don't bother too much about any language in which you have to communicate.
Oral Expression: Brevity and Elaboration
Oral expression in any language is a delicate affair. Sometimes you have to be brief, in tune with the adage, "Brevity is the soul of wit," and other times you have to be elaborate. It depends.
Regards,