Feeling Stuck in Negativity and Loneliness: How Can I Find Peace and Happiness?

I am feeling very low, depressed, holding onto past grudges, and always negative about life and the outlook. My social relationships are poor, and I feel lonely and sad. Please help me learn how to break free from negativity and achieve a peaceful, happy, and quiet life. This has been bothering me for a long time.

Thank you.

I knew a person who felt like that. Kindly get your serotonin levels checked and take some medication. It will help. Kindly see [Serotonin and Depression: 9 Questions and Answers](http://www.webmd.com/depression/recognizing-depression-symptoms/serotonin). Also, kindly give more details about what you do and what your past grudges are. This happens to people when we bottle up our feelings and do not bring them to the open. For example, a person may have bottled up how they felt as a child when growing up; problems with parents, feeling unfairly treated when compared to siblings, or having problems with friends, etc. The more you express your feelings, the better; that is getting things off your chest. Wish you all the best.

Have a nice day,

Regards,
Simhan
Learning and Teaching Fellow (Retd)
The University of Bolton, UK
Chief Advisor, Promentor-consulting

This type of situation exists in the life of all. Anyhow, we have to get over those. For social life, read "6 Thinking Hats" and "How to Have a Beautiful Mind" by Edward De Bono. If you read these two books, then you'll gain the ability to guide others.

Best Wishes 

Steps to Achieve Peace in Social Relations

The best way to start being at peace about your social relations is by doing these few things:

- Make friends by sharing a "secret" or a "story" about yourself.
- Try to frame your mind to focus on how you can be more involved and give more to any social gathering.
- When you are organizing an event, try to give one-on-one time to everyone, even if it's just a few seconds.
- Talk about what the other person is doing, then share what you did in that space. Never criticize; be enthusiastic.
- Never criticize people. You can put forward your opinion but never bring the other person down!
- As Simhan suggested, get medical help. Many times it's a deficiency or some malfunctioning glands.
- Finally, get over the idea that you need to be "liked." You need to be useful and generous.

Regards,
Sid

You seem to have a lot on your mind. If you discuss it with someone close to you, it might help you a bit. Another thing to consider is focusing on daily activities: start doing some kind of exercise like walking in the early morning, listening to music, swimming, etc.

Ensure you eat proper food because generally, people with these kinds of feelings may not be eating properly, which can harm their health. Keep yourself busy, as an idle mind is the devil's workshop. Just do anything that relaxes your mind.

Follow this principle: "Eat well, relax your mind, and keep yourself happy." 

I hope this helps for now. I am sure you will emerge from your depression. If this persists, please seek help from a doctor.

Regards,
IG

Concentration will help you a great deal. However, you have to pull yourself out of such depression. First of all, you need to prepare yourself to want to get out of it.

Moreover, you should be happy; there is no use in being sad. Everyone has ups and downs in life, and everyone has to learn from such situations rather than being upset and sitting idle. Be bold, and face the world with lots of courage and challenge.

Every morning, wake up and look in the mirror, smile, and promise yourself that you will be happy the entire day. Try to keep your promise.

Regards,