How Can I Diplomatically Ask for a Raise When My Boss Shows Favoritism?

Hi Members,

I am in a dilemma. My boss is really a difficult person, and his biggest problem is that he favors only those whom he has himself recruited. I am one of the few people whom he has not recruited, and this is where my problem starts.

I have been working in this company for the last 11 months, and there are no signs of an increment (though I have not asked for it myself). I feel that an increment is not something that one has to ask for.

Now, I want an increment, else I am ready to resign. Please let me know how I can ask for an increment in a very diplomatic manner. I also want to make my boss realize that he is being unfair since everyone recruited by him has received an increment.

Help me with this matter and also how to go about an increment in a diplomatic manner as I cannot stand favoritism. If I talk about it, it may turn into a heated argument, which I don't want.

Please help!

Prachi

Hey Prachi,

It feels terrible to have such a kind of boss. If you don't see any growth or job satisfaction in the present company, it's high time you should look out for a better job. Why be diplomatic when you know you deserve the hike? You can directly talk to him about your performance and increment.

Regards,
Meenu

Hi Prachi,

Wow! Your situation is so similar to mine! But even though I agree about increments being given without asking, sometimes a push or a hint in the right direction does not hurt. If your boss doesn't like you, then it is necessary that you ask for your increment:

1. Make a list of all the tasks that you have done well, especially those where you have exceeded expectations.
2. Think about how you are going to talk about your increment - making a strong pitch for an increment based on the above list.
3. Schedule a half-hour meeting with your boss (yes, do make a formal appointment - tell him that it's to discuss your increment and work in the organization).
4. Present the pitch and wait for his reaction.

If you are given a positive response, then good for you! But if that's not the case, then I suggest that you should start searching for a better job. It might help to put that list and your pitch formally in an email to your boss and his seniors after he has given you a negative answer.

Regards,
Leks

Oh, and one word of caution... It might be best if you already have a few possible opportunities lined up before you put all of that in an email. I don't think your boss will quite be pleased about that. 😄

Wow, it's unfortunate you're in this type of position. I am blessed to work with a management staff that treats everyone fairly and gives you what is deserved.

Here's the question: does your company have a handbook? What's the rule of thumb regarding performance reviews and pay raises? Most companies highlight this information in their handbook. Although all performance reviews do not guarantee a pay raise, if it's deserved and you know that from the review scoring, then you are entitled to it.

I personally agree with a lot of the other comments made. If you're not being treated fairly, I would definitely start looking for employment elsewhere because there's nothing worse than going to a place where we spend the majority of our time and not feeling comfortable or enjoying the environment. Good luck and I wish you much success.

Anasha

Try finding a job in another company.

Working solely with a focus on the anticipated benefits means that the quality of performance in the current job or duty suffers due to the mental agitation of anxiety about the future. In reality, the unpredictability of events means that outcomes do not always align with our expectations, leading to potential disappointments. Therefore, the Gita advises us not to jeopardize our present commitments for an uncertain future.

Dear Prachi,

Go ahead with Lex's suggestion. It will reveal your boss's mentality and attitude towards you. Try it.

Regards,
Sree

Hi everyone!

Thank you for your support. Well, Lex, I am already on the lookout for a job but am not finding a good opportunity. Your idea of being straightforward is valuable, and I am going to approach things the same way.

In the meantime, could you please help me locate a good job in Delhi? Thank you for your support once again!

Cheers,
Prachi :)

Hi Prachi,

Unfortunately, I am facing the same problem in my office. My boss also believes in favoritism and has some favorites in the office. People suggest us to quit the job, but as you've also said, it's difficult to get a good job. I hope our conditions will improve one day.

Dear Prachi,
New job is not a good option for you and for anyone, "Friends stop misguiding her"
You are new in this company and I don't think so this is right decision to leave the origination. You have to have patience otherwise you will not survive anywhere else. Please think if in new company the system is same or worst that you have in current organization then what will happen. You quit from there also? Then where you go? What you will do?
I suggest you to show your capability and caliber in your current origination with happy and smiling attitude then you see every thing around you become good and that is sure your boss will never loose you
Hope you understand
Regards
Pankaj Chandan
HR - Department

Hi Prachi,

I completely agree with Pankaj Chandan... as the saying goes, "a known devil is better than an unknown devil." I guess you can take it up as a challenge and prove your capabilities to your boss. All the best!

Regards,
Joyita

Dear Pankaj,

What about the humiliation that one faces every day, as my boss is aware that he is not doing justice and giving various kinds of statements to my fellow colleagues. What to do in such a situation? Do you still advise me to be there and prove myself, as I have been doing the same for the last 11 months?

Do reply...
Confused???

Prachi

Hi,

Logically, what Mr. Chandan has advised is correct. However, having been in the same situation, I feel that no job is worth that much aggravation. If Prachi's boss is anything like mine was, then Prachi will be suffering a daily quota of humiliation, insulting behavior, and stress along with her own share of insecurities and worries.

She might even lose her energy and passion for work, and as a worst-case scenario, her self-confidence and self-esteem might take a hit. I know it is difficult to get a new job, and there are chances of the new boss being equally bad or even worse.

But ultimately, it is a decision that Prachi has to make. If she is willing to take that chance, then there is no harm in trying for a new opportunity...but please don't quit before you have another concrete offer in hand.

Meanwhile, you can try to put in more effort and become your boss's right-hand man/woman. Or you could even take a break of about 3 days to a week and think about what's important to you and gain perspective on things. Is it possible that you are mistaken about your boss's behavior?

But no matter what you do, please ensure that whatever actions you take, your performance doesn't suffer and that there is no cause for complaint.

ALL THE BEST!

Regards,

Leks

Hi Prachi,

Why are you thinking of asking about your hike in a diplomatic way? You can ask him very directly. Present all the work you have done in these 11 months and inquire about the hike.

If he acknowledges that even though he didn't recruit you, you are one of the best candidates on his team and gives you a hike, stick with them. Otherwise, you can start your job search, and it should not be difficult for you to find a new job.

Good luck.

Regards,
Prabha

Hi Prachi,

I recommend that you analyze the following before deciding on your next course of action:

1. Analyze how and when you realized that your boss is taking a biased approach. Evaluate your relationship with him and other colleagues both before and after that incident.

2. Consider whether there are other possibilities beyond what you currently think.

3. Assess your contribution to the organization – is it aligned with your Key Performance Areas (KPA), and do you meet all Key Performance Indicators (KPI)?

4. Also, analyze how your colleagues perform (those who you believe receive biased treatment from your boss) and determine their strengths and weaknesses compared to yours.

5. Reflect on your professional learning curve and improvements.

6. How can you ensure you avoid landing in a similar situation in the future?

It might seem easy for you to find a new job. Don't just chase jobs or money; think about your career and how you can build it. Remember, every job comes with its challenges, including dealing with a boss.

Take this situation as a challenge, work to change it, and then explore new opportunities.

Feel free to discuss further if you need more assistance.

Regards,

Vijay

Hi Prachi,

I would second Vijay's suggestion.

It is very important to list down facts and try to maintain some detached objectivity so that if and when you do get into a discussion with your boss or skip a level, you do not come across as 'emotional'. During the discussion, if you become angry, cry, or suppress your feelings in order to appear calm, you will only receive responses such as 'be calm/relax/be open to feedback/let's take this up when you are calmer/you should work better in a team', etc.

During your job search, look into what companies are asking for additionally from applicants with your profile. Is there a project/area/job rotation/shadowing that you can ask your boss for, which will help you in securing a better job a few months down the line? Since your boss does not like you, he may assign you a challenging project that his favorites might not want due to the amount of work involved. Alternatively, you could play his game and express your interest in taking on additional work/attending a relevant training program by stating that you aim to be eligible for an increment. However, ensure that you have your goals defined and understand what you are committing to and for how long :-).

Best of luck, and we are with you.

Anuradha

Hi Prachi,

Lex's suggestion is perfect. Go ahead and talk it over with your boss, and please keep us posted.

GOOD LUCK,
Cathy

Dear Prachi,

Changing jobs can be a good solution, but what will you do if your next boss is no better than this one? My suggestion is to handle this situation tactfully. It is a common thing that happens to anyone, but going for another job is not the solution.

Now, here is what you need to do:
- Make a note of all the tasks you have undertaken during the past 11 months.
- Note down your achievements.
- Outline your future plans under the present role.
- Provide suggestions to improve the working environment.

After this, talk to your boss politely and tactfully and ask him for a raise. Avoid comparing yourself with any colleagues. Focus on discussing your own performance and mention that it has been almost a year, and you are expecting a raise.

If this approach doesn't yield results, consider speaking with the top management.

Explore all possible avenues while maintaining professional standards. Running from a problem is not the actual solution, so give it your best shot.

All the best.

Regards,
Upasna Kaushik

Hi Members,

I am in a dilemma. My boss is really a difficult person, and his biggest problem is that he favors only those whom he has himself recruited. I am one of the few people whom he has not recruited, and this is where my problem starts.

I have been working in this company for the last 11 months, and there are no signs of an increment (though I have not asked for it myself). I feel that an increment is not something that one has to ask for.

Now, I want an increment; else, I am ready to resign. Please let me know how I can ask for an increment in a very diplomatic manner (also, I want to make my boss realize that he is being unfair as everyone recruited by him has received an increment).

Help me with this matter and also how to go about an increment in a diplomatic manner as I cannot stand favoritism, and if I talk, then it will turn into a heated argument, which I don't want.

Please help!

Prachi

---

Prachi, what is your total work experience and how long have you been working with this company? What do you mean by "Not Recruited by my boss"? I am sure he must have interviewed you before bringing you into the department. Usually, people get appraised after the completion of one year, in what we call "Anniversary Appraisal," so wait until you complete your one year.

Are you still in the probation period? Did you receive your confirmation letter?

You need to answer a few questions before asking for help.

You can also reach me at sanjeev.himachali@gmail.com.

Regards,
Sanjeev Sharma

Dear Prachi,

Everybody has their own views. Running away is not a solution. You may find a more difficult boss at a new location. But it is also true that you cannot change your father and boss. We have to find a solution to this.

1. Make yourself superior to others by the quality of your work.
2. Make your boss dependent on you by providing quality work that others can't do. Simply put, you have to excel yourself.
3. Make a note of all the work you do and your achievements.
4. List them in your appraisal form.
5. Talk to your boss politely and assertively about how your work is affected or not affected in the absence of any increment and why you deserve the same.

This will take some time, but you will definitely see a positive change. Meanwhile, you can look for certainly better openings. But please don't rush until you have an emergency.

Regards,
Rupesh

Hi,

It has been such great support from you members that I feel I will be able to overcome all that I am going through. I want to inform you that I did have a detailed discussion with my boss regarding everything I am experiencing and what I perceive as incorrect and unfair. I highlighted my achievements, KPIs, new tasks, and my contributions to the organization, and I sought feedback on areas where I may have lacked.

The response I received was, "I DON'T THINK IT IS THE RIGHT TIME TO GIVE YOU ANY INCREMENT, AND I WILL APPRAISE YOU ONLY WHEN I THINK IT IS NECESSARY TO GIVE YOU ANY SORT OF INCREMENTS/PROMOTIONS," without any further justification.

Now, I am contemplating whether it is unreasonable for me to start looking for a new job because I believe there is no scope for further discussions. Please let me know if I am wrong in considering this step. I am still in a dilemma.

Prachi

Dear members,

This is Simta, working as an HR executive for the past 8 months in a HR department that has been established relatively recently (1.5 years). My situation is quite challenging as I feel like I am not truly working in an HR environment, and my career growth is being hindered due to the current conditions prevailing in our organization.

While my boss tends to use positive language, when it comes to decision-making regarding employee development and seeking support from top management for new projects, I find that the support is mostly verbal and lacks practical implementation.

I am discouraged from providing honest feedback, especially if it is critical, to any senior members. This situation implies that my job entails conforming to existing practices without being able to voice the genuine concerns of the employees. Additionally, it seems unlikely that these circumstances will change according to the seniors.

As HR professionals, I believe it is essential to comprehend the actual working conditions and investigate why such a negative and disruptive atmosphere persists. We should strive to mitigate and manage these issues effectively.

What do you say, GUYS? I would appreciate your valuable thoughts and suggestions on this matter. Should I consider exploring other opportunities in the job market?

Thank you.

Best Regards,

Simta

Hi Prachi,

It is very pitiable to think of your position. As you mentioned that you joined 11 months back, I believe you haven't tried completely to know about your boss because you said that he always talks to you angrily. Firstly, do one thing: impress your boss with your work and just nod your head and say "Yes Boss" for whatever he says and follow him blindly without arguments even though you don't like them. After a few days when he gets nicer to you, casually bring up your salary but remember not to stress about it. Hopefully, at that time, he will definitely favor you. Wishing you the best of luck. 😊👍

Hi Smita,

If your problem is that officers are supporting you only in words but not practically, let them face the problem when it comes to selecting candidates or recruiting employees for the organization. It is a big headache for them when there are no right candidates for the organization's development. Take some time to understand your work's importance and stay calm. Meanwhile, explore other job opportunities in different companies. If they don't recognize your work, you can consider changing your job. However, remember not to resign from your job without proving your worth and importance in that role. 🙂

Be strong in mind and approach. Medical studies continue to show regular meditation working magic in reducing blood pressure and stress-related illnesses, including heart disease. Brain images show that regular meditation helps calm the most active sensory-assaulted parts of the brain. The ancient Hindu sage Patanjali, who had mastered the secrets of the human mind, has written a book "Yogasutra". In this book, we can see how superpowers can be achieved by meditation. It has both cosmic relevance and cosmic resonance. In spite of its universal appeal, for most people, total control of the mind remains an elusive goal and daunting task. From time immemorial, there have been many attempts throughout the world to unlock the mysteries of the mind and to achieve total control over it through a variety of techniques. One of the most powerful of these techniques is meditation.

Hi Prachi! How are you?

In this world, we have to create our own space not only by doing what we need to but also by showcasing it on the right platform in the right manner. Have you missed the bus?

Take care,
Suru
💡

Hi Prachi,

I joined a company as a fresher. Even for me at the time of joining, I was promised a salary hike after 6 months. However, I didn't receive the hike. When I approached my boss, he said he would adjust it in the next month's salary, but there wasn't much difference from my previous month's salary. I was totally upset because I was the only person handling around 150 employees. I discussed this with him, but his response was, 'You joined as a fresher, and this is all we can offer you.' I became frustrated because I was working more than what I was being paid for. I waited for a year, but I didn't receive any hike or appreciation (which is expected when one performs well beyond monetary rewards). I started looking for other opportunities and now have an offer that pays double my previous salary.

So, don't lose hope. In some companies, they might provide a raise after completing a year. You've waited for 11 months; just wait one more month. If the situation remains the same and you feel like moving on, then consider leaving. But before that, secure an offer.

All the best for your future.

Wishes,

Swati