Corporate Language

The 'Corporate' language !!

'We will do it'
means
'You will do it'

'You have done a great job'
means
'More work to be given to you'

'We are working on it'
means
'We have not yet started working on the same'

'Tomorrow, first thing in the morning'
means
'Its not getting done...
At least not tomorrow !'.

'After discussion we will decide -

I am very open to views'
means
'I have already decided, I will tell you what to do'

'There was a slight miscommunication'
means
'We had actually lied'

'Lets call a meeting and discuss'
means
'I have no time now, will talk later'

'We can always do it'
means
'We actually cannot do the same on time'

'We are on the right track but there needs
to be a slight extension of the deadline'
means
'The project is screwed up, we cannot deliver on time.'

'We had slight differences of opinion'
means
'We had actually fought'

'Make a list of the work that you do and
let's see how I can help you'
means
'Anyway you have to find a way out, no help from me'

'You should have told me earlier'
means
'Well even if you told me earlier that
would have made hardly any difference!'

'We need to find out the real reason'
means
'Well I will tell you where your fault is'

'Well.... family is important, your leave is always
granted. Just ensure that the work is not affected'
means
'Well you know...'

'We are a team'
means
'I am not the only one to be blamed'

'That's actually a good question'
means
'I do not know anything about it'
.
.
.
.
.
AND FINALLY, THE BEST OF ALL...
.
.
.
.
.

'All the Best'
means
' You are in trouble'

Hey Good yaar. Actually what we are doing the same u have expressed har.It is not exaggeration.It is happenig in every corporate companies.
Nice keep posting

Hi
Its a beautiful posting, I am experienced with my colleagues and other department people.
Great Posting and funny too. It gives us clear picture to understand what other people is telling to us.
Regards
Deepak S

That's really very good, in fact its a reality of the day. Keep posting such a nice "language".

The 'Corporate' language !!

'We will do it'
means
'You will do it'

'You have done a great job'
means
'More work to be given to you'

'We are working on it'
means
'We have not yet started working on the same'

'Tomorrow, first thing in the morning'
means
'Its not getting done...
At least not tomorrow !'.

'After discussion we will decide -

I am very open to views'
means
'I have already decided, I will tell you what to do'

'There was a slight miscommunication'
means
'We had actually lied'

'Lets call a meeting and discuss'
means
'I have no time now, will talk later'

'We can always do it'
means
'We actually cannot do the same on time'

'We are on the right track but there needs
to be a slight extension of the deadline'
means
'The project is screwed up, we cannot deliver on time.'

'We had slight differences of opinion'
means
'We had actually fought'

'Make a list of the work that you do and
let's see how I can help you'
means
'Anyway you have to find a way out, no help from me'

'You should have told me earlier'
means
'Well even if you told me earlier that
would have made hardly any difference!'

'We need to find out the real reason'
means
'Well I will tell you where your fault is'

'Well.... family is important, your leave is always
granted. Just ensure that the work is not affected'
means
'Well you know...'

'We are a team'
means
'I am not the only one to be blamed'

'That's actually a good question'
means
'I do not know anything about it'
.
.
.
.
.
AND FINALLY, THE BEST OF ALL...
.
.
.
.
.

'All the Best'
means
' You are in trouble'[/QUOTE]

M.S.R.MARIYAPPAN

Funny Languages............but any one is sure that this has been followed anywhere in the corporate world?

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