How Can I Handle a Team Member Trying to Take Over My Managerial Role Without Conflict?

Dear Seniors,

I request for your valuable suggestion.

I am working in a firm as an Assistant Manager - HR Operations. I handle a team of 8 persons: 4 in Chennai, 3 in Pune, and 1 in Hyderabad. We provide HR services to our clients. I have been working here since September 2008. I got married in December 2008, so I had to take a 10-day leave. I had to train a backup in Chennai to perform my tasks in my absence.

When I am back, I could observe that he has taken over and gained more importance from my clients' end. He wants to perform all the important tasks alone and gain importance. He began to demand other team members. I did not want to fight; I want to handle this issue in a dignified manner. I request you all to guide me on how to handle this.

I had a word with my boss. My boss told me to consider all the team members as children and just go on. I did the same, but now I feel things are out of my control. My boss provides all his support to me, but handling the team, I am not satisfied from my end.

Looking forward to your inputs.

Hi Nithya,

Time to put your foot down and show who's in control. You can't please everybody. Get this straight. The guy will not take it lightly and may fight back. It's survival of the fittest, dear, and you are not here to get brownie points. It's a question of your role and authority.

You are trying to be polite, but this is a dog-eat-dog world - eat or be eaten.

How long has the guy been in your company? How much value does he provide to the company? Take these into consideration before entering into a showdown - by which I mean have a threesome session with your boss and the guy and sort out matters. If you wait for things to happen, things will get out of hand, and you will be a dummy.

Already, you were undermined by not being taken into appraisal and overlooked by the boss - have a gut feeling that your boss will side with this guy. Think and jump. Also, have plan B (alternative job backup) if things don't go well, or are you willing to be swept by the wayside?

Nithya,

These are common issues found everywhere in all departments. Maybe this guy is trying to act too smart, but it's not that easy all the time. Being in a position and handling a team is not easy. Ultimately, what matters is performance, how you handle things, and your sportsmanship. Don't worry. Don't get depressed.

Ok, let me put it this way...

Firstly - I suggest you be friendly to all members, but at the same time, make sure they respect and obey you. Don't give them space to take you lightly. Ensure there are no loopholes and avoid sharing too much of your personal information with them. Maintain boundaries for everything and take things seriously.

Secondly - Talk to your boss and ensure that all the assigned tasks from the clients are diverted to you as you are responsible for them. Then, decide which tasks should be assigned to whom, set deadlines, and so on. Before assigning tasks, call for a meeting with your team members, including the 8 members. For outstation members, arrange a conference call. Follow up every week and collect daily task sheets from them. Make sure to update your client and your boss. Be proactive; this will help you gain confidence from both your client and your boss.

It's been over 10 months since you got married, and it's late to take initial steps in sorting out this issue. These matters should be addressed as soon as you notice them because if you let them grow, they will eventually destroy you. There's no need to be overly good or kind to everyone. Be brave and assertive. Have authority in your voice. Assign them plenty of work to keep them busy.

Be confident in all your actions and try to regain confidence from your client; only then can you regain your position. When it comes to official work, be strict with your team members and ensure you grab the client's attention.

Hey, thanks Ramesh and Maliiiiiiii!!!

I have taken all the steps whatever Malii has told, but the issue is he has an understanding with the client, and I suspect that he is passing on the information out of the office. Myself and the boss do not have any proof with us to take action against him.

I have made everything tight with team members; everyone obeys me, but everyone feels this guy is demanding as he performs his tasks perfectly!

Hi Nithya,

Throwing your weight around, that's one thing.

I hate to say it from a male's perspective - assuming most of the guys working under you are males - there's the issue of guys working under gals. Forget the guy threatening your team members; guys don't mind being banged around by guys, but when a female boss shouts, it pricks their ego badly.

I know from experience. I served two hugely talented lady bosses, brilliant in their own right, and still respect them. I learned a lot from them - single-minded focus and dedication. However, I was the object of ridicule whenever I had a bad day at the office. The guys would poke fun at me during lunch or tea breaks. These same guys would have faced a stinging reaction from their bosses, but they ignored this.

As far as dealing with your client, I suggest that you ask your boss to get in touch with the client directly and inform him that all transactions/interactions be routed through you. The guy acted smart and cheap.

Whenever I interacted with clients, I made it clear that they were interacting with me as a representative of the company. Any relationships I developed outside of work, I have never and will never use to undermine the company.

Take your boss into confidence and ensure that the guy is undermined and pressured to realize his mistakes. If worse comes to worst, the boss has to choose between one of you. Don't indulge in backbiting or gossiping (from your mails, I know you won't); be critical (but not openly) and ensure that the guy realizes his mistakes. At some point, he may realize (if he does honest introspection), or else he will move on and take the client with him. That's where your boss first, and then you, need to step in so that you don't lose the client. Good companies have 2-3 people dealing with a client, so as not to lose them, if one of them moves on or switches allegiance.

As I understand, your boss has to do a lot of work, more than you, if he is genuinely interested in giving you your due. Sit with him and make an action plan. He should be the one who needs to tell the smart alec that his area of responsibility should not be crossing your areas. Alternatively, the boss can hand over some tasks which you are handling to the smart alec so that he is kept busy and does not interfere with your work.

Sooner or later, the smart alec will leave, or you will have enough ammo to see that he goes. Be good to all and in your work. Truth and honesty will triumph in the end, though it takes time. Do not get flustered until that time.

It's not about dues; it's more about competence. I would suggest that you need to do introspection as I have encountered the same issue in my team, and people tend to align with where the real value lies.

Do your own evaluation as the team is not coming to you despite your presence.

You should evaluate the following areas:

A. Knowledge Leadership in the last 1 year - 1 to 5 Scale

B. Process & System Leadership

C. Initiative & Recognitions

D. EQ & IQ

Just honestly do a SWOT analysis; you will get the answer. No junior can dare to do so unless they have potential and you have weaknesses. Politics will harm you; it's better to work and show your strength as a boss, and soon things will be in your hands unless you have done nothing in the last year. Subordinates are really like children and evaluate you every second, so you cannot challenge their judgment. Also, the person who has taken you as a replacement will automatically have respect if you have shown exemplary track record.

Dear Nitya,

Good morning!

I suggest that whenever responsibility is delegated to your team member before you leave, you should send written information to your client and all concerned parties. This communication should explain that you will not be available during those days, but arrangements have been made for the smooth functioning of tasks by assigning your team member. Upon your return to duty, promptly inform all stakeholders and seek feedback to ensure no issues arose during your absence.

I hope implementing this practice will help minimize such situations in the future.

Best wishes,
R Shanti

Hi,

Sometimes this happens... Don't worry. Bring clarity to the roles each one of your teammates has to play, including yourself. Call for a meeting with all your teammates. Inform them of the roles and emphasize on protocols.

After this meeting, send individual emails to each of your teammates with your boss in the CC and close the matter once and for all. Make it clear that protocols are to be strictly followed and that you will handle customer interactions. Cut their link to the customer. Call the customer and inform them that you will be taking over from now on, as before.

Addressing the issue directly will help to resolve it quickly and openly. All the best.

Rama

Hi Nithya,

It was in December 2008 that you took 10 days' leave, right? Almost a year is going to pass, and I wonder why the problem is still existing. In fact, you had 10 months to make things return to normal. Obviously, anyone would want to perform well and progress to the next level. So, you are saying that he is doing additional work (your work) to gain more attention, and you fear he will take on your role. I would like you to think about your agenda. Do you aim to move upward or safeguard your current position?

It is not the 10 days that actually spoiled the situation; it should be something else. Perhaps this guy, in this context, is really good/determined, and there is a "need" that is pushing him to that extent. So, what is your need/purpose? Utilize that as a driving force to reach the next level.

Room for Elevation:

If there is legitimate room for elevation, then that is permissible. But taking undue advantage of the role given to play for a shorter span of time would not naturally lead to moving up the career ladder.

You need to take stock of the situation and clearly delineate the roles and responsibilities of the person in question.

Everywhere, when he tries to overplay or act smart, his activities must be curtailed to clearly indicate that his work is limited to a specific role, beyond which he cannot go.

It is not right to assert, whether he is in "need" or not, that once a Manager is present, none of the subordinates can assume his role unless the situation warrants.

KB

Excellent remark from you, Niku. I am 100% with you!

"It's not about due; it's more about competence. I would suggest you need to do introspection as I have encountered the same issue in my team, and automatically people tend to fall on the side where the real value stands.

Do your own evaluation as the same team is not coming to you despite your presence.

You should do valuation in the following areas:

A. Knowledge Leadership in the last 1 year - 1 to 5 Scale

B. Process & System Leadership - Do

C. Initiative & Recognitions - Do

D. EQ & IQ - Do

Just honestly do a SWOT analysis; you will get the answer. No junior can dare to do so unless he has potential and you have weaknesses. Politics will harm you; it's better you work and show your strength as a boss, and soon things will be in your hands unless you have done nothing in the last 1 year. See, subordinates are really like children, and they evaluate you every second, so you cannot challenge their judgment. Also, the person who has taken you as a replacement will have automatic respect if you would have shown some exemplary track record."

Balaji - I am not talking about the "need" of the person being there - but an individual's need for working. For example, my need for working is definitely to grow further in my career and not get stuck with one activity. For this, I would try to assume higher responsibilities and delegate simpler tasks to my juniors. Going forward, I would see how best I can advance and also let my juniors grow. But if I stand in the same position, fearing about someone taking my role - would I not be just another normal human? What makes me different? What brings me success?

There is one question that we also need to answer - what if a person comes to you and says "Hey, I can do my task really well, but my senior manager is thinking that I will take over him/her, so he/she is not letting me grow." Won't we say, "So what if your boss feels afraid, maybe he is not good at this task and you should continue showing your performance and move up the ladder"?

Won't we advise the person this way?

Similarly, I also want Nithya to answer - why the delay? The leave was taken last year in December - just 10 days. In 10 days, no one can change things that we can control, unless and until he is really good, or - if we are not so good.

Think

Hi Asha,

There was no delay in my action! I have taken all the steps to make him understand his role. I just posted it as the intention is there in his mind, though he obeys my instructions, he has a gut feeling.

In 10 days' time, there was some understanding developed in him and the client. He passes all info happening in the team, which the client is sure I cannot be like that. The client needed a spy, and he is the one, but we don't have proof. Hope you understand.

Hi Nithya,

I can completely understand the pain of being taken over by some of your juniors. Somehow, this incident reflects one of your personality traits which shows that you are a very fair and decent person. You feel that if I am all clean and do not step on anyone, no one else will do the same to me. However, this is where you are wrong. This is the high time when you must understand that the corporate world is a thankless world and no one cares for anyone; all the management wants is a high level of competency to handle the department. Clients are the most important people for any management, and if this candidate of yours has a good relationship with the clients, then I must say he must be a really competent guy.

I still wonder why your reaction time got delayed by almost a year. I mean, what were you waiting for?

Anyways, now the solution part:

You have to be slightly mean. I am sure even your manager will not be on your side in the actual sense, so now you have to take over:

- Call for a meeting, rather a very strong meeting from your side with a very strong commanding sense.
- Brief everyone's roles and responsibilities to each of your team members.
- Make it a point that no emails go out without you being kept in CC.
- Make sure no major decisions are being taken without your approval.
- Ensure that you are the first point of contact for the clients.
- You have to work really hard to gain clients' confidence in you.
- Be slightly mean, keep your team engaged in some or the other work, so that no one will have time to go against you.
- Check their performance on a regular basis, give them nice classes in case they mess up.
- Last but not least, don't compromise with your peace of mind, keep your cool, consistently improve your knowledge in your field.

Take care and all the best,

Hi Balaji,

While I agree with your explanation, Nithya reports that information leaked outside is a breach of confidentiality. If the person truly has talent and is willing to grow, it is well and good, as you say. From a generous view, a manager can allow the knowledgeable person to grow and move up the ladder. However, if the person misuses their authority, then the question of their usefulness arises.

I hope I have made my point clear. Thank you for coming up to clarify with your explanation.

Regards,
Balaji

Ash Mathew said:
Balaji, I am not talking about the "need" of the person being there, but an individual's need for working. For example, my need for working is definitely to grow further in my career and not get stuck with one activity. For this, I would try to assume higher responsibilities and delegate simpler tasks to my juniors. Moving forward, I would see how best I can advance and also let my juniors grow. But if I stay in the same position, fearing someone taking my role, would I not just be another normal human? What makes me different? What brings me success?

There is a question we also need to answer - what if a person comes to you and says, "Hey, I can do my task really well, but my senior manager is thinking that I will take over him/her, so he/she is not letting me grow." Wouldn't we say, "So what if your boss feels afraid, maybe he is not good at this task, and so you should continue showing your performance and move up the ladder"?

Wouldn't we advise the person this way?

Similarly, I also want Nithya to answer - why the delay? The leave was taken last year in Dec - just 10 days. In 10 days, no one can change things that we can control, unless he is really good, or if we are not so good.

Think

Dear Nithya,

If that's the case - you should not put it across to your senior as "team member trying to take over team manager's role." It should be this way - "team member given access to certain information, that seems to be passed on to the client and can prove disruptive for business." Or "Breach of confidentiality agreement"...simple, right?

In this case - how will he pass on information? Only if he has access to the information, right? (Now please, I want people to understand access to information does not mean only from the computer or confidential soft/hard documents - it's not JUST this). Check how that can be stopped.

If you tell your boss - the person is trying to overtake your role, it will only appear less appealing to your boss. It will appear that you are afraid. (It did appear that way to me! Apologies). So make sure he has no contact with the client through the usual means (phone? email?) and also - if at all that is required, it has to be copied to you.

Take control, Nithya... and yes, you are late at this point. See, anyone can initiate necessary steps. But the follow-up? Seems like you let the situation continue this way for a year. If you had already taken any initiative (and constantly followed up on this), you would by now have had this team person under your control. See where you missed it - did you just warn/tell him and leave it? Or did you catch him doing it each time and create a proper system to monitor? Did you have control over his mode of communication? Do you have the facts to prove he has been floating confidential information? If you do have the last one - you need to take a call, dear... how long will you wait further?

(For all the people out there - "system to monitor" need not be just a mere technical lingo!)

Balaji - I am talking in the context of "team member trying to take manager's role".

That's it. And yes - Nithya has to think if the topic should be "breach of confidentiality agreement" or "Delay in monitoring" - not whatever she has given as the topic.

Nithya - I am not trying to be harsh - but certain things we need to ask ourselves and start working on it - it's never too late, you can still have control over this guy. This is called "leadership".

Ash,

Agreed. It's a leadership quality by which the situation can be brought under control. It's a good point that you highlighted. Very clear explanation and thanks.

Balaji

Dear Nithya,

Actually, the team members are thinking that your assistant is one of them and they feel more comfortable with your assistant. So, he is in demand. Simultaneously, he is more reliable for clients, so clients prefer him.

Sanjeet

Dear Nithya,

Since how long have you been there as an Assistant Manager? You mentioned that your subordinate took temporary charge in December 2008. If you suspect that he is cleverly attempting to secure your position, then you should also work diligently to be promoted to the next level. The management will never retain two people in the same position, and if you are efficient, they will never demote you.

Think it over!

Regards,
arpu82

Have been following this discussion from the beginning.

Asha, I agree with your reasoning completely!

Nithya, please be clear about whether the said person wants to 'grow' or whether he wants to 'take over' from you!

There's a difference between the two - if he is ambitious and has leadership qualities and wants to move on to the next level - lovely - if he's managed to do it in 10 days of opportunity - he's a real achiever!!!

Now the next angle, if he is trying to 'take over' from you specifically, and wants to see you out and 'not' obeying your orders, then there's a personal grudge, and it's actually a matter of workplace conflict. Please differentiate between 'not obeying orders' and 'doing more than ordered' (which means he's taking more initiatives than others).

If he's not obeying, you can simply act like a boss - give him a couple of warnings and take his case during appraisals. Why worry?

I really would suggest that you become friendly with him and discuss with each of your team members about their individual career graphs.

~Shikha

Exactly, Shika - you have pointed out the differences. Moreover, Nithya, you might want to inform him on how and what he must communicate to the client. If anything additional to that is being floated, you can also inform him of the charges that will follow that kind of behavior. Obviously, sharing information that is otherwise prohibited is bound to disciplinary charges. In that way, he is not ethical. You need to be stern.

Hi,

Please you really need to first be calm and then analyze the entire situation.

Do you really thing your colleague would take your position just because of his/her performance in 10 days?

What is the point of view of your boss and others about your colleague?

Are you reacting correctly for the situation?

How is your reaction seeing by your boss, colleague and management?

Is you reaction correct or would you be proud of it in the future once this has passed?

What should you really do or need to do?

What should be your correct actions?

What do you need to do and how should you do it? Are you doing it?

Sometime we need to get out of the scene to be able to do a better evaluation for the situation and put step to follow through.

Of course we also need to know what you we want to do…then what to do to get there…and/or what do we need to get there.

I know this are to many questions, and I do not give an answer to your situation. However, remember the right solution to your problem may be in yourself if you start seeing the situation as an issue (NOT A PROBLEM) and a challenge and (NOR A BARRIER).

Regards,
Pjuan

Go for the groundwork again. Get into the field and try to make contact with your team members by yourself.

Dear Nithya,

Tough life, but we have to face it! Why could somebody take over you with the client and with your subordinates so quickly (within just 10 days)?

At this point, you should analyze yourself first. Were your dealings with the client and subordinates right? I don't mean to put you down, but a self-analysis would be of great help. With a little bit of assistance from your boss, you can retain your position once you understand your capabilities and potential.

Dear Nitya,

First of all, make the duties and responsibilities in writing and give a copy to your boss. Also, send the mail to each department to clarify who is responsible for what. As the in-charge of the particular department, you must establish accountability for each individual. No one should encroach on another's work area, so duties and responsibilities must be clearly defined and strictly enforced. If someone oversteps their boundaries, take strict action against the offender. Implement disciplinary measures, such as issuing a warning letter or, if necessary, removing them from their position.

Thank you,
Sushil Kumar

Hi,

The suggestion is very old but equal to gold. Use Saam, Daam, Dand, and Bhed, as mentioned in the Vedas, Chanakya Niti, Ramayana, and Mahabharata.

Regards,
Deepak

Hi Nithya,

I agree with Ramesh... since you have taken all the steps and still not happy, ask your boss to talk to the client that all the transactions should be routed through you. It's the only solution, even I feel for this situation.

All the best...

Dear Nithya,

May I know what his experience is? You should try to schedule all work for him and ask for regular updates. Just make sure he doesn't contact your seniors. If he completes any work, be the first to update your manager. Keep track of what he is doing and all related tasks. Talk to him about his desired position, responsibilities, or salary increment. Can you assist with this?

Waiting for your reply.

Regards,
Ananthi - Leocominfotech
Email: sankaraananthi24@gmail.com

Hi Nithya,

I will just try to give an impartial opinion.

See, as you stated, in 10 days' time only you could feel that the person is trying to take over and has majorly succeeded in it. Did you try to analyze why and how it happened? Maybe he has good people skills and good client interaction.

Also, it is quite obvious that many people in today's time have a desire to succeed and jump up the corporate ladder ASAP.

I feel that you will need to do some gap filling. Show him that you are more capable, hardworking, and smart working. Try to gain the reputation back with your clients by being extra efficient and taking up their projects, delivering the service before the deadline.

To overtake someone is not easy, but it's a competitive race. Instead of feeling scared or miserable, it's always good to pull up your socks and fight back. Remember one thing, it's always the survival of the fittest. So deliver results and face the competition.

All the best.

Regards,
Neha

Hi Nithya,

It was in December 2008 that you took 10 days of leave, right? Almost a year is going to pass, and I wonder why the problem is still persisting. In fact, you had 10 months to address the issue and return things to normal.

Obviously, anyone would want to perform well and advance to the next level. So, you are suggesting that he is taking on additional work, possibly your work, to attract more attention, and you are concerned he may assume your role. I would like you to consider your agenda. Are you aiming to progress upwards or safeguard your current position?

The 10 days of leave may not be the root cause of the issue; there could be something else at play. Perhaps this individual is exceptionally skilled or determined, and there is a pressing need that is driving him to such lengths.

So, what is your need or purpose? Utilize that as a motivational factor to propel yourself to the next level.

Hi Nithya,

Do not worry and get panicky. You still can turn things your way. I feel that maybe you were too busy in your personal life after your return from marriage that you may have failed to attend some important tasks which would have helped this guy in cementing his position with the client as he is more responsible. That's my gut feeling. Anyways, you can still try to turn things around. I completely agree with Asha Mathew. You should think of coming up with a strategy to move up your career ladder to the next level. By this, I don't mean your designation change. Try to find out what are the critical things that you can handle. I am sure you are also good with your people management skills. It's time you pull up your socks and look forward in your career rather than thinking of this guy who is climbing up in his career. Don't keep looking back. Just move forward :-)

All the very best,
Raghav V