Overwhelmed as the Sole HR in a Large Company: How Do You Cope with the Pressure?

Dear all,

I am feeling frustrated :icon7: about my job.

I am an MBA in HR with 6 months of experience in HR.

I am working in the automobile service industry, working for the past 3 months. I have started feeling tense and frustrated with the job. I am handling payroll, ESI/PF, grievance handling, disciplinary action, and everything that the employer thinks is HR-related. The company has 300 employees, and I am the only person in the HR department. Most of the employees have passed only 10th grade or less.

There are issues such as leave encashment, late salary deductions, overtime, and other salary-related matters. We don't have policies for leave encashment, late deductions, overtime, or other salary issues.

This month, there have been lots of angry, heated discussions between employees and me. I usually keep my cool, but this month I have started losing my temper. I have also been an active participant in the heated arguments. Now, if an employee asks me anything like salary doubts or what's happening in HR, I feel angry and behave rudely.

My employer is giving me more responsibilities and demanding more from me. Recently, the employer gave me feedback that:

1. I should be punctual at work as I come 10 or 15 minutes late (I work from 9:15 am to 8:30 pm and feel exhausted after the day's work).
2. I should take more initiative and be more active.

I am trying to improve in these areas but feeling frustrated. I am even doubting if I have chosen the wrong field because the employer has their own agenda to hide information from employees, make late salary payments, not decide the salary of new entrants on time, and delay most of the HR-related issues.

I feel that other departments have work that does not dissatisfy employees as the HR department does. The blame is always on the HR department.

I am not able to understand what is happening to me as an HR professional.

Regards,

Pratap Kamble
9689901446

Hey Ravi, never ever give such advice, even as a joke. I can tell you of instances where it took the wrong and totally avoidable turn.

Pratap will get back to you tomorrow if you don't mind. Maybe, if needed, he will call you since you gave your number.

Regards, TS

Chill out, Pratap. Frustrations are a normal part of human nature. No worries. It's only you who can help yourself in your situations. Just relax and be calm. Don't be in a hurry. The best thing is to be quiet and have patience. Only then can you figure out what is actually bothering you. Is it either your profession or personal life that's troubling you? But believe, time will heal, be it either. It's just how you react.

Since it's a recession, let time go by. If it's your new job that's bothering you, then don't worry; this is common to everybody. Try to find out what exactly you wished for from this job and what you have ended up in (sometimes our perception also plays a role). Then, if your boss has given you a negative performance comment, analyze if it's fair or not. If not, sit down with your manager and speak with him calmly about what made you come late. If you are overloaded, speak with him about any options, like having an assistant, or how it can be worked out. It's just three months, so discussing with the manager is a good thing (you know this actually works out - continual meetings with the manager are always healthy; they feel good that they are being approached and sought by you and show how interested you are, but be polite and put things in a positive way).

Maybe you need a break from work; take a day or two off from work and do what you have been longing to do. Talk to your friends and family members, relax. This will help you ease out with your co-workers. If anybody tries to start a heated conversation with you or your boss, try hard to remain silent or look into their eyes and say, "I will get back to you with the answer." Hurry back to your desk, open a Word document/notepad, etc., and start typing whatever you wanted to say to him. Then don't save it, minimize it, and just do something else like drink water or sing, blah, blah. Now maximize it and go through it; it would sound funny. By then, you will be relaxed and can go back to him and try to answer him positively.

Hey, I know working for 13/14 hours is really stressful. So, eat healthy and have a sound sleep. It might help.

Try all these; it might sound draggy, but this is what can be done by letting things happen their way and watching them calmly to make it happen for us next time. You will then find ways of how different ways you can go about your work. Also, get in touch with people in the automobile industry like yours. It might help. Guess what, you might even discover that they are also feeling the same. So, you can have ideas.

Dear Pratap,

Being a fresher in the field of HR, you may not be able to handle so much pressure, which is the main reason making you feel frustrated.

Firstly, you are only working in an organization with a manpower strength of 300. If you cannot handle that, then later in other bigger organizations, you will be even more frustrated as the manpower strength and pressure will be greater. So, try to prepare yourself for that now.

Secondly, the work you are currently doing is a pure HR and Admin job. If you don't enjoy doing that, then I'm sorry to say that you may not fit in this role.

Thirdly, as a fresher, you must appreciate your boss for giving you such a good career break so quickly. He has provided you with the right platform to learn and explore various areas of HR.

If you feel that no policies exist in your organization, then it is up to you as an HR person to frame such policies. If you need any help in doing so, we are all here to guide you.

I don't think you need to lose your temper for the reasons specified by you. I also feel that you may be disturbed in your personal life, and you are blaming your professional life for that. I request you to kindly identify what is bothering you so much, take a break, and then start working fresh with the right mindset.

If you need any help, you can email me at elvira_parkinson@yahoo.com.

Regards,
Elvira Parkinson.

Pratap...

Nothing comes easy in life. Please read this aloud - you are not frustrated with the job, you just need to take control of things going on. You have finished college and now you are into work... and this gives you the freedom to take control of things and your life.

I understand you had posted earlier on "Employees bothering you with a lot of questions." There I had asked you to take a reverse look at it - "Employees are confused..."

I know that you have reached heights of being frustrated... and that is why you just broke out. Relax - I was like this. Used to work for long hours, feel exhausted, and still get no appreciation. Over time, I learned that it was not in being overly dedicated or putting in additional time that helped. It's all in "How we analyze the situation and take it one at a time and finish the task." You are just into the industry, and you need to realize that - everything cannot be done in a single day. Go one by one.

First and foremost: Please spend a weekend - only for yourself. Be selfish... unwind yourself. Be in the place you love the most (even if that means a Cafe Corner! / home / or just take your bike and go for a safe drive).

This is because you need some time for yourself to relax and understand that THERE IS MORE TO LIFE! Work is just a part of it. Don't immerse yourself too much in the work part... (as a fresher even I did this... I thought WORK was eating my life... But It was me who exaggerated it).

Second:

You know there are issues around. Your employer wants to be proactive (this is the key - being proactive). Take a little authority on your side and implement policies (work on it sometime at home when you are free... and you really have good things around you happening -say music??). Policies related to late coming, OT, disciplinary... all the HR related part. There are certain things that are STANDARD for any employee. Make a manual for all these "standards" and keep copies of these in each department (make sure you do have an orientation too) - this avoids unnecessary interruptions that can help save your time.

I feel bad about the time part - is it that work is between 9:00 to 8:30? I doubt... Again, it must be that you are working really hard. DON'T DO IT! Just work within the specified hours, and on exceptional cases, you can stay back for 30 minutes or so.

Frustrations happen with everyone. It's just that it also happened to you... You seem to be avoiding yourself. Why don't you pamper yourself for a day or two (weekend)? You will get back with fresh energy. Your employer has seen the potential in you and probably prefers you to contribute more. I would say - contribute more by reducing unnecessary work for which I mentioned that you can make your tasks easier by putting notes on the notice board for certain issues that everyone must be aware of. If anything has to be communicated to many of them... send an email and also follow-up with a discussion immediately and finish the communication part. Be strict in what you have mentioned... no reconsiderations for anyone.

It's in the way you carry out things will be fine.

If you are looking frustrated - 10 people will come to you to suggest ways of improving (one like your boss). If you smile and look cheerful - people around will also look cheerful and understand your role. This is what makes a part of an HR professional.

HR is a very delicate area. There are a lot of things that need to be handled with care. Your employer may have a delay in making salary payments; it's in the way you communicate to the employees that will make the difference. It's not just your company; these flaws are there everywhere at least once in a while.

You can also conduct some motivational/ training sessions to keep the atmosphere good. Moving forward... once you have tackled all this (especially your frustration), if work is really getting on you, you could ask your employer if you could hire an assistant / at least on a temporary basis. (Just an option - you may or may not choose to...)

And whether you have chosen the right path or not, I can only tell you this - It takes to be an HR professional. You will not have people around you praising you; you need to be self-motivated, and your job is to make sure others are motivated too! ;-)

Chill... and - YOU REALLY NEED SOME TIME FOR YOURSELF.

I am usually awake only between 8:00 AM and 8:00 PM... I mean I work only between those hours... otherwise... the time is all mine. I am selfish with that. I need to... Cos I know, I am worth it. (Except that in these last few weeks I am a bit addicted to citehr... need to reconsider my login time :-(

Dr. K. Dhamodharan
Consultant Psychologist

Dear Prathap,

Don't worry. Frustrations in life are inseparable. Life is full of ups and downs. You have to adjust to the present situation until you get a better opportunity. There are a few established exercises to help you relieve stress and feel refreshed. Let me email you.

Keep cool,
Dr. K. Dhamodharan

Dr. K. Dhamodharan,

Even I need to see a psychologist. 😢😢😢 I am too frustrated and depressed in life. It's like no one understands me. 😢😢😢 Everyone uses me. 😢😢😢😢 The whole world seems selfish. 😢😢😢 There is no light at the end of the tunnel, nothing works as I think. 😢😢😢 And many more...

Please seek the help you need. You are not alone in feeling this way.

Take care.

Wow, Pratap,

I should say you are lucky. I wish I had at least ONE person to advise me SO IMPARTIALLY when I was taking the knocks of life, career & personal.

I don't think I can add more to what Kavita, Asha, Elvira, and others have said, except putting things in a clearer perspective to YOUR situation.

I know practicing whatever is being said by so many of your friends on CiteHR is much more difficult than their words, but bear in mind THERE IS NO OTHER WAY, i.e. if you want to progress. Except that you could do it at your own pace & methods... that's all you have in your control.

We spoke just now. Please feel free to call me when you are free. Life comprises of its UPs & DOWNs--that's the fact of life. All that is in YOUR hands is learning HOW TO HANDLE THEM... that's all. And I am sure you can do it... with so many friends out here to guide you. BUT IT'S YOU WHO NEEDS TO TAKE THE STEPS-- something like the parent TEACHING the child how to walk, but it's the kid who has to do the ACTUAL walking.

All the BEST,
TS

Dear Ravi,

Honestly, when I saw your response to Pratap the other day and I suggested you not to say such things, I had a feeling you did have similar issues.

Suggest email me at taj@sphinxresources.com

Whatever I wrote to Pratap just now—as also what Asha, Kavita, and others wrote—apply to all of us, including those who wrote, me, and you. It's only a matter of how we handle situations... for the situations aren't in our control, but the way we can respond (not react, mind you—there's a hell of a difference between the two) is the only thing that's in our hands. And our response is a result of how we look at the situation, followed by what and how we think/analyze of the situation... then follows the response. Meditation works out the best to handle if such situations get worse... but more of it later.

Regards,
TS

Hi,

Do your work sincerely and take things positively. In fact, you are getting a good base to start your career as it seems you are setting up an HR department which was not there before. Working late hours is not a problem, as you are investing in yourself to reap rewards later. Be positive and calm, and all will be fine once you get settled in your career.

Hey Ravi,

First of all, why do you let someone take advantage of you? Is that your nature?

If yes, well and good. That's how Ravi is. But why does Ravi think everyone else is a mirror and must treat him back the same way?

No one understands you? Have you given yourself to someone to understand you? Have you been understanding enough? - I say NO. (Don't think I am being harsh - if so, I am just speaking the truth).

Any question posted by people - 3/4ths of the time you have been harsh or just insulted them. Hey, don't say that their questions make no sense. Just like how certain things are important/sensitive in your life...the same question holds importance in their life.

So, HOW HAVE YOU CONSIDERED OTHERS IMPORTANT? If not - reconsider the way you look at people and their situations, then the way they look at you will be different.

World seems selfish -

Ahhh - yes. All of us are selfish in some way or the other. To reach our goals...we have to sometimes be so. If the world is like that - why do you abide by the rules of the world? You have a great heart, that is what makes you the way you are.

No light at the end of the tunnel?

Make sure you carry the light torch yourself and be a light to others who feel the same way. Who do you think has set the tunnel to an end so that light can be seen? Another person like you who did not find the light - he dug his path and helped a million others. (Do you get what I am saying?)

And many more? Only you can fight it back. If you think you can - you can. If you think you can change the way the world looks at things - you can. If you think no one understands you, you can make them understand you. If you think you want to control your destiny - only you can do it.

How? By being what others could not be. Be the light...be the understanding person... Be the selfless person.

I have been through this... I have asked the same questions. But... now I ask myself back, "What have you given to make others give you back?"

K.Ravi, even I need to see a psychologist. Even I am too frustrated and depressed in life, it's like:

No one understands me,
Everyone uses me,
The whole world seems selfish,
No light at the end of the tunnel, nothing works as I think,
And many more...

I feel a sense of acceptance when the level of acceptance increases, the problems decrease, and solutions to the problems become visible. Secondly, managing people by taking care of the egos of seniors is crucial. When God sent us to this earth, there was a single reason, as I believe, and that was to go to the earth, solve the problems, and when the problems are resolved, He asks us to come back.

Dear,

You have got a good break in terms of learning. Freshers do not get to do any policy-related work until they have at least 3-4 years of experience. Love your work. Love the people.

Dekh bhai, success in HR is being good with your customers and letting them be good with you. You mentioned you have 10 pass people working in your organization, so it's easy for you to tell them what's right and wrong. You cannot imagine how these learned people react when you tell them something new. Be with your company employees, and learn as much as you can.

Thank you.

Dear Pratap,

I can understand what you are feeling right now, as I am also the only HR in my current organization. When I joined, so much pending work was there which was left by the previous HR. People used to compare me with her. But I never lost patience. I tried to learn what the employer wants from employees and what employees want from him. And gave some mid-way suggestions to both of them.

I never reacted harshly to anybody. I made myself in a position where everybody can understand the importance of a mediator. And if a mediator will react rudely, then the essence of your role will be lost.

You may refer to some points which I followed.

Have patience, don't lose temper, don't speak those things which will quote you. Try to convince people, have documented policies and rules so that whenever anyone complains, you can show him the rules; this will also stop any deviation. Make a discipline committee of employees, let them work on their matter in your presence.

Always remember that people will come to you only when they trust you, so earn their trust. They have only you to forward their problems. You have to be a pacifier, and that is the most challenging part of being an HR.

Gunjan

Dear Ash Mathew,

If you are doing whatever you have mentioned within 3 months of joining this organization where you are working, you need to be lucky! None gets to handle so much for a 6-month experienced person who is in the second job already! Tighten your belt and tide over this! This experience of yours will teach you more than what your books taught you!

Cheers!

Sriram:p

Oops, Sriram.

I have 2 years of experience, not 3 months. But yes, in my FIRST three months, I was also like this. :-)

I guess you got the name wrong. It's okay. But that was a great message for the person who posted this. I guess he is fine by now.