Dealing with a Moody Boss Who Never Explains Decisions: How Do You Cope?

Hi Everyone!

There is something that I have been wondering for quite some time. How do you deal with a boss who is not satisfied with anything regarding your work, is moody and irritable, and is simply whimsical and does not feel the need to inform you of the rationale behind his decisions? Even if you do make any attempts to communicate with him in this regard, he simply thwarts all such attempts and mentions that there is no need for such communication.

Regards, Shyamali

Hi Shymali,

As the saying goes, "Try, try until you succeed." So keep trying to communicate with your boss and try to understand his feelings towards your work, etc. At some point, he may open up about the reason behind his behavior.

If not, then I think you should follow Rajan's approach. 😊

Regards,
Julie

Hi Julie!

I would have advised my friend to go THE RAJAN WAY had they given up easily. I guess they are too hard a nut to crack. 😄😄😄

Regards,
Shyamali

Hi Shyamli,

This is the part and parcel of life. "People" are most difficult to handle. People management is the most important thing in office life as well as in personal life. There is one saying, "Parents and bosses, we cannot choose, they are given to us, we have to manage relationships with them. If we manage good relationships with them, then only we can be happy in our life."

So cheers, handle with care, be diplomatic, be nice, forget the small things, and keep focusing on your target.

Warm regards, Rohini

Hi Shyamali,

In my personal opinion, you should once put your foot down and make it a point to clarify certain points with your boss. Before this, let me tell you that this can be achieved only if he is moody and not dissatisfied with you.

If I were in this situation, I would certainly write to him (if he is not ready to communicate verbally) and ask him to spend an hour with me to make certain things clear. During that time, you should make things clear to him about your expectations from him as a boss and also listen and try to live by his expectations of an employee.

I believe there is nothing more important than self-respect and self-esteem. Anyone trying to disrespect it should be communicated with about the effect it is having on you and the hindrance it is causing to your progress. The best thing is to make it clear to your boss that it is hampering your growth and your attitude towards work is getting affected due to this behavior.

Regards,
Himanshu

Shyamali, One suggestion re lack of communication is that you highlight to him the impact that lack of communication is having on your effectiveness as an employee. For example, “When you don't let me know who you are going to send the report to, I won't be able to adjust the format to their preferences.”

Re the continual complaints about your work, ask him to say specifically what is not right about it so that you can correct the deficiency for next time.

My feeling is that your manager has other longstanding and personal issues going on, or that his behavior is just a reflection of his personality and longstanding habits. Because it's unlikely you can have any impact on his personal problems and/or his deeply entrenched habits, it's also unlikely that you will have much impact on his behavior. To do this, you would need some political weight in the organization and you would need to be the type of person that he respects.

As the other contributors have already said, when it gets to the point where you can't stand it any longer, it's time to look for a new job.

Vicki Heath

Human Resources Software and Resources

http://www.businessperform.com

Well, I think giving up is nothing but escapism. I believe, as some of the gang say, "try, try till you succeed." In one way, it is an experience, and you really turn out to be the best in the worst situations. So, I guess maybe we should accept it as a testing time for us, not for the boss. 😄

In the future, when we work elsewhere and unfortunately encounter these kinds of specimens, we would know by then how to handle them. Quitting is the last option. 😉

Hi Shymali,

There are times when you try and try and try again, but the nature of the individual is such that he cannot see the good things in situations. So when you realize that you are almost at a breaking point and it's affecting your way of work and your contribution, it makes no sense to continue further. It's important to retain your mental health while at the same time giving the best shot that you could ever possibly give.

Regards,
Anu

Hi All!

I am really pleased with all the enthusiasm that you have shown regarding the problem. I cannot help but agree with all of you. However, I seemed to have missed out on an important element that Vicki has rightfully pointed out: "lack of communication is that you highlight to him the impact that lack of communication is having on your effectiveness as an employee."

I would like to thank all of you for your suggestions.

Yours Sincerely, Shyamali