Jokes........Jokes........Jokes..........

mujhe taras aa raha hai is haalat me, pata nahin kahan kahan se dhund kar jokes la rahe ho taki uske saath ek line ki baat bhi kar pao....bade hi nirdai hai ye duniya wale.....

hhannn yaar...mein bhi wahi socchi rahi hu...sach may yaar..baht problme hay..........
jokes suno..........
Santa: Itne kam marks? Do thappad marne chahiye.
Pappu: Haan papa, chalo maine us saale master ka ghar bhi dekh rakha hai.
:) :)

Hi All,,,

Boyfriend
A 5-year old boy went to visit his grandmother one day. While playing with his toys in her bedroom while grandma was dusting furniture, he looked up and said, "Grandma, how come you don't have a boyfriend?"
Grandma replied, "Honey, my TV is my boyfriend. I can set in my bedroom and watch it all day long. The TV evangelists keep me company and make me feel so good.
The comedies make me laugh. I'm so happy with my TV as my boyfriend." Grandma turned on the TV and the picture was horrible. She started adjusting the knobs trying to get the picture in focus. Frustrated, she started hitting on the backside of the TV hoping to fix the problem. The little boy heard the doorbell ring so he hurried to open the door.
When he opened the door, there stood Grandma's minister. The minister said, "Hello son is your grandma home?"
The little boy replied, "Yeah, she's in the bedroom with her boyfriend."
Suman

Good jokes.......durga, dimpi and Sohi...........keep posting.........darta toh hoo yaar........kahi itni jo baat hoti he woh bhi bandh na ho jaaye..........ab toh aadat si ho gayi he tum sab ko milne ki.......lo ab joke suno..........sorry padho.....
DOUBLE DECKER BUS RIDE
Santa Singh and Banta Singh landed up in Bombay. They managed to get into a double-decker bus. Santa Singh somehow managed to get a bottom seat, But unfortunate
Banta got pushed to the top. After a while when the rush was over, Santa went upstairs to see friend Banta Singh. He met Banta in a bad condition clutching the
seats in front with both hands, scared to death. He says, "Arre Banta Singh ! What the heck's goin' on? Why are you so scared ? I was enjoying my ride down
there ? Scared Banta replies. "Yeah, but you've got a *driver.*"

Over Your Heart

The teacher advised the class to start the day with the Pledge of Allegiance, and instructed them to put their right hands over their hearts and repeat after him. He looked around the room as he started the recitation, "I pledge allegiance to the flag..." When his eyes fell on Little Johnny, he noticed his hand over the right cheek of his buttocks.
"Little Johnny, I will not continue till you put your hand over your heart."
Little Johnny replied, "It is over my heart."
After several attempts to get Little Johnny to put his hand over his heart, the teacher asked, "Why do you think that is your heart?" "Because, every time my Grandma comes to visit, she picks me up, pats me here, and says, 'Bless your little heart,' and my Grandma wouldn't lie."
suman

Painful Love Story
Hero loves heroine , but heroine loves the villain.
But villain loves hero’s sister,and hero’s sister loves heroine’s brother .
Here, heroine’s brother loves villain’s sister .
But villain’s sister loves hero’s brother.
Again!, hero’s brother is also interested in heroine , and you already know that heroine loves villain.
Finally two people commit suicide.
Who’re they? ……….. Producer and the Director!!

1960 girl :Pehla phela pyaar hai chhai bahar hai,
aja sajna tera intzar hai. 2003 girl : dusara/tisra pyar hai,
dil bekrar hai,
aja more sajna verna chautha tayyar hai.

Would you like to go back to nursery again and learn a whole new set of A,B,C,…? Learning can be so much funnnn when you have a friend like Banta in class. He’s invented a whole new nomenclature of A for Apple. Make sure you memorize this new list!!
Banta in classroom - Madam maine “abc” yaad karli..
Madam - Ok , to sunao..

Banta - abcdefghijklemnopqrstuvwxyz…..
Madam - Arey aise nahi ….aise suna A for apple
Banta - Ok Madam….

A for apple.
B for bada apple.
C for chhota apple.
D for dusra apple.
E for ek aur apple.
F for fokat ka apple.
G for gol apple.
H for hazar apple
I for itney saarey apple?
J for jaao nahi khaani hai apple
K for kaise nahi khaayengey apple
L for lena padhega tumko apple
M for mujhe nahi chahiye itne apple
N for naa nahi kehtey kyunkey yeh hai apple
O for Oh to tumne khaa daale yeh saare apple
P for peth bhar khaao apple
Q for qismat mein nahi hoti hai sabke, yeh apple
R for roz agar khaao tum apple
S for sehetmand rahoge khaaogey agar tum apple
T for tumko nahi milengey itney achey apple
U for udhaar kii nahi hai yeh apple
V for very tasty hai yeh apple
W for waste na karo time aur khaalo jaldi se apple
X for X’mas mei bhii Hi! khana padenge apple
Y for yun na chehra phero dekhkey apple
Z for zaraasa aur khaalo apple aur………..
So, let’s go to Banta and learn the new A, B, Cs from him, no more B for Ball, C for Cat, chill out, it’s time for Banta’s A, B, Cs! It’s not that hard to memorize them- An apple just makes its way for another apple and the chain goes on. Imagine the teacher’s expression after hearing Banta’s A, B, C…..Hats off to Banta!!

Suman

School Kyon ate ho????????????
Teacher: Tum school kyun aate ho?
Student: Vidya ke liye sir!
Teacher: Phir tum class mein soo kyun rahe ho?
Student: Aaj Vidya nahi aayi hai isliye sir!!!