Dinesh Divekar
Business Mentor, Consultant And Trainer
Ash Mathew
Recruitments, Training`
Human Resources - Generalist
Learning And Development
Customer Care
Raj Kumar Hansdah
Shrm, Od, Hrd, Pms
Hr Student - Learner
Account Manager
+4 Others

Hi Seniors,

I am working in a private limited IT company as HR personnel since 10 months. By being as a HR person,my responsibility to introduce the policies by keeping in mind about organizational & employees growth. Now, the problem is, initial tenure of 3 months, everything was perfect, but after that I came to know & understand practically about dictatorship behavior of boss. He wants to run this company as one man army types. Whatever the decision he makes, that should be implemented in any circumstances, where as he even do not think of my suggestions necessity also. He treats their IT engineers as labours of factories, and implements all non sense kind of policies without thinking of revert effect. I can give you a small example, I tried to start communication training session, as i felt it may help engineers to perform well at client location and it would also improve our rapport, but boss has refused to permit by saying that "if they would improve than they would not sustain in our company", do not it shows how mean and narrow minded he is? It is just an one example, where as I have ample of activities done by him regularly. In my view it is completely exploitation.

The worst part, he now started taunting or commenting on me as well from past 4-5 months and also started putting me down for my any reason (do not miss the single opportunity),because of that I feel this is not the right place to grow myself. He started giving me task with deadlines without providing me resources. So, I thought of start giving interviews, and tried at few companies, but in interview i did not find absolute answer for the some of the questions i.e., why do you want to leave this company in only 10 months? I am just not able to convince the interviewer.

Seniors, please suggest & help me, what should I do, as I am feeling frustrated and finding no growth by working in this company, looking for change desperately, no reason can convince me to sustain in this company anymore, as I have tried my level best by giving my all efforts towards organization development. please guide me! Thanks a ton!!(If any seniors could provide his/her contact details, it would be really helpful for me)
5th October 2009 From India, Mumbai
Dear Ram,
Reason for move can be: Looking for oppptunities that can utilize your expertise.
You can mention that thought the current organization is good - it seems like there are less possibilities of using your skills, and you'd like to look for an opportunity that can make use of the available talent.
You could let them know that, the first few months seemed promising as far as utiliaing skills concerned, but then you later felt that the purpose of the role was lacking visibility.
You could always state that money is not the reasobn - "job content" is the reason.
5th October 2009 From India, Madras
Hi Ash,
Trust me!! I was expecting a nice solution from you as I alwayz go through your solutions for different issues. I really appreciate your solutions, thanks a millions also for this time.
But, I would request you to go through my problem once again as I have edited & something by giving some example. Probably you would be able to understand that pain which I am going through.
Thanks Again!
Tk care!
Sr. Executive-HR
5th October 2009 From India, Mumbai
Dear Ram,

All of us (including me) tend to NOT see the "actual problem" when we are deeply depressed.

I can mention a few of the emotional issues you are going through:

a) You hate getting up every morning and think that you are going to work

b) You sit at your desk and sometimes glance through all the work you have done and

feel like deleting it - because, you feel there is no point in you having worked so hard

c) You feel that you dont have anything to sell as far as skills are concerned, because the last 10 months you have been hopin that things will take a fine shape atleast later

d) You tried showing facts and figures to prove that your efforts are really for the benefit of the company, but your boss cannot understand

e) You discovered the true face of your company only after the initial honeymoon period

f) This depression is getting on to your personal life as well - as you are not able to be a part of every other good thing since the career aspects have dominated you

g) You FEEL you cannot convince prospective employers on teh reason for chaneg

Let me tell you whats the actual problem here:

You have made up your mind to move, you only need a pat on your back to motivate you during interviews and not to give up any hopes.

Solution: Inventory your skills, highlight your contribution (irrespective of whether it has been implemented or not), If possible take the sufficient material with you to prove your efforts. And please let the interviewers know your real need for change. Its not your boss that you should blame during interviews, it should be your "need" to improve and contribute and safe guard your skills and increase the skill set.

Also - tell them, if their fear is whether you will move out of the new job very soon, you can even agree to work for a specific number of months.

AND - please make sure that what ever profil you take, you are confident that it is a place that will "help in enhancing people's performance"

You might wonder why I did not suggest you to talk and convince your boss. Buddy I have seen such people - I have also tried. But since I am very young in my profession, I cannot experiment and then "wait" for that success. Had I been a person with 20 years of SUCCESSFUL HR career, I would have opted to convince that person and change his attitude becuase : have already achieved what I dreamnt of, I would take this as a challenge.

But at this point when we are tryign to develop our career, we need proper guidance and the scope for implementing our thoughts / efforts/ work. So - dont waste your tiem by even worrying for this employer.
5th October 2009 From India, Madras
Hi Asha,
Hats off to you!!! Its a pure mature solution which you have given to me, you are absolutely correct as its exactly same happening with me and my both personal & professional life are getting hampered drastically.
It is an awesome solution and suggestion. Well, I shall really try to boost up my motivational factors, and yes I remember, I did some mistakes in my past interviews, which I would not repeat.
I had started thinking of resigning from the current job without waiting for the new opportunities. Anyways...I would like to appreciate you for your million dollars solutions.
Thanks n Regards,
Sr. Executive-Hr
5th October 2009 From India, Mumbai
Dear Ram,
Dont quit before getting a new job. Take it from me - one month - try hard for a job. Until then just follow what your boss wants to do. Becuase if you remain jobless, it will be difficult to convince any employer. They may think that you cant handle pressure - when the truth is something else.
:-) I am happy you have been a bit relieved. We tend to be the victim of someone else's stupidy. Juat make sure if you are depressed, there is a true reason for it. Keep looking! Leave in a cheerful manner, becuase reference checks matters. Your boss may refer you stating that "he quit becuase he could not handle the work here".
So - stay until you get a new job.
5th October 2009 From India, Madras
Dear Ram,
Management science or no science for that matter is above our good old proverbs. You are casting pearls before swine and getting stress out of this.
Cast what a swine likes. Else find out someone who understands value of your pearls.
At the same time make sure that you do not walk off in a huff!
Preceding posts show you had good amount of interaction with Ash that is well-founded.
Dinesh V Divekar
5th October 2009 From India, Bangalore

Hope you are reporting to CEO or a person in Director Level. My response is based on that only. In case if you are reporting to HR Head, this is not applicable

I too have the same question ''why do you want to leave this company in only 10 months''.

Please don't act on the basis of sudden thoughts or better to avoid impulsive decisions. You need to understand the hardcore reality that in any industry ultimate decision maker is the investor and not HR Manager or HR Advisor or VP HR. Who hired you? Investor, right? So she/he has 100% authority to decide your 'job profile'. Your boss may allow you to provide strategic suggestions but never expect that you can run the show.

Also please note that you can't practice all that you have learned in management books...investor may publish HR philosophy in corporate plan, speak for hours on Human Resources Development...but end of the day core objective would be 'to make the business more profitable' and being HR, your job is to support investor to make more profit. Over a period of time, you can become more powerful (Eg:- if you can convince your boss that your suggestions can make more money or reduce wastage or improve quality...)

Eg:- Your boss is not wishing the engineers to be trained in communication because he/she fears that the engineers will quit the job if they improve communication skills. This can be a strategy of your boss. So being HR, you are supposed to support it or come up with a better strategy ( your boss may accept your suggestion if you workout a plan with solid financial advantage)

If you are experiencing ethical conflicts, when you move to another company ' there will be no-guarantee that you can work as you wish'.

So relax and enjoy work...best of luck
5th October 2009 From India, Bangalore
Hello Ram,

Though your situation seems tough, I would suggest that you do take some time introspecting yourself and the situation before you reach a decision. Is your manager generally like this with all employees, or is it just with you? ( to know if there is personal angle to this). There is also a possibility that this could be the general attitude of the manager and that he has been a task master all his life!

In that case you would have to be manipulative( what I would call "STREET SMART") till you get another job or are able to win over him by doing things the way he wants it. Show him that you can stand up to the occasion and can deliver at the toughest of times. Do not accept defeat - I know its tough....real tough but you need to go through these things to make you stronger. Bombard him with your achievements, keep him aware of what you are doing everyday and take in the comments no matter how sarcastic they might be as a step to self improvement.

These things will keep you motivated and pumped up at all times and can sure help you put your best step forward in an interview.( remember a dull face will do you no good). Besides it will also buy you enough time to find a new job.

Good Luck!


Check out my HR blog : The HR Knowledge Space
5th October 2009 From India, Delhi
I am not a senior but still i feel to suggest you so putting some tips of my knowledge, never loose ur job untill u hve other in hand.
2) Always be clam very clam when u r neglected by boss.
3) At d time of interview never give bad comments about company. you can say..there are some bad practices when are been asked to imply were as its voilation of policies ...so i am looking for other job.
I hope these tips ll help u by any means..
Take care & happy seeking..Good Luck
6th October 2009 From India, Mumbai
Hi pratham,
Thanks for your suggestion, its not about senior or junior, anyone can be a victim of frustration or depression, what all need a positive motivational support from anyone, no matter whether the person is senior to u or junior to u.
I wish you all luck to grow in future, and billions thanks for your suggestions.
Tk care
6th October 2009 From India, Mumbai
Problems exist every where, well every orgnaization and bossess have certian style to operate to get their work or priorities. Sometime you may call dictatorship, autocrat, diplomat, & what not,... the key is trying to accomodate the change and being flexible, Sometimes. we all face critical acclaim when it becomes personal and hurt (Self Esteem) the prime reason our beliefs which carried positive opinion turns to -ve in the next light when you are in bad books.

Look deeper within is there anything that i can doo to help myself,.
-Is there a way to mend my relationship.
-Is there something i need to compensate to rebridge the communication
-Do i need to be obssessive or keep gap silence for other person to understand

& Finally, if set your own priorities and goals which you intend to achieve, which is not subjective to dependencies, which make you feel strong as You are bound to get What you planned and intended"

Going to interviews where you need to find answers and justifiable answers and importantly +ve ( where you NEVER back bite about your boss) the golden principle and keep your tone, body language modulated, this will boost your priorities and lead to do best at what you are doing

All the best
6th October 2009 From India, Bangalore
Dear Ram,

Indeed nice talking to you and wht i have understand tht from your points which mentioned in this forum.... you dont want to take pressure and want to be cool person in HR Dept.... Ex... when you have tried to help your Engineers to provide them the Communication training and your boss objected it because of lossing the Current Employees and expecting the new problem in future after hiring the new staff.... so being into HR you should have followed the rules and regulations of the Organization...and as you said that your boss had started giving you more tasks with deadlines and might be its not possible for you to deliver the solutions for given task, so this could be the reason for looking a change..

My self having around Years of Exp in HR - as Generalist and joined a Comp in Last year June 2008 and before joining the Comp Mgmt have told me that need to take care of Entire HR Gamuts and its was nice going on till my probation completes, after my probation completes then the real pressure started to me from my two bosses....even i also taught same like "U" in initial days to switch to different comp who have ethics and culture, that time i took two days of leave and enojyed those two days and back to office then i really understand what my boss need from me, so for few days i have acted like the same then there after i slowly started them showing the comparision with different companies and their culture, now its been totally changed like, i can independent take decision which will be benefits to the Organization and now me became a member of Global HR Team of my Organization

So i can only say you that the difference between the the impossible and the possible lies in the mans determination and once you switch over to other Comp then you might have not given that much freedom to do experement and its better for you to stick with the same for some more time and try to make changes in your current boss by showing the Organization Development / Structure, because as you are with the same Employer since 10 months and you might have idea about what is your boss and others, so act accordingly and then take actions slowely and implement them..

this what i can say you and be wise while taking the decision and all the very best for the step what you take
6th October 2009 From India, Hyderabad
Hi Ram,
How Are You?
Yes, problem is serious bcz its directly affect to you future planning, goals and satisfaction. you have been that org. from last 10 months Why cant you continue for next two Months you will solve the problem of 10 Months and meanwhile look for better opportunity. Might be bcz of Hurry you will fall again under such types of bosses.
HR professional is nothing but dealing with PEOPLE sometime good and sometime like your BOSS. donít worry Keep it up and Best of luck.
6th October 2009 From India, Hyderabad
see dude ,many times its happen to us .As u say he is ur boss.so rather than changing his attitude it should be better for us v hve ro change our attitude.i know its very difficult to do that .as HR PERSON V R KNOWN FOR OUR CREATIVITE & INNOVATION. so v r known for" NEVER SAY DIE ATTITUDE "do ur best it doesnt matter somone not appreciating ur skill and knowledge.
as far as interview is concern,u can tell them sir/madam my boss is very idle man ,he is paying me for doing nothing .but it against my RULES.I m the man WHO WANT TO EXPAND MY SKILL & KNOWLEDGE.I think that position which u hve is best sutable for me .
6th October 2009 From India, Pune

The suggestions posted here is appreciable and carry deep meaning in it.

However, I would not advise you to leave and go somewhere else. Quitting is not always the resort. I am also not asking you to fight, struggle or make an attempt to change person's (your Boss's) behavior. But, you must introspect, take some leave and go off this scenario to think about it from a different perspective.

Remember, no corporate situation is IDEAL and problems, tussle, agony, pain, in-differences may prevail at all places. Dont' search for the situation where your suggestion are always given the importance or respect that you expect. You may be thinking from your perspective but the company head or your senior member has to think from the perspective of betterment of your the entire organization. I don't know other list of your suggestions to your boss than arranging for training the engineers. According to your boss, the training may not be the solution to that problem or not required at all. Bosses have to think from many perspective, including the ROI and long term returns for company's betterment.

According to you, your boss may be an idiot and he does not carry any long term vision and does have ability to think and implement novice ideas. However, there are always two sides to look at and I advise you to take the second look at the whole situation.

Remember, you have spent 10 good months here. You are aware of the bosses temperament and other things here. However, new company may have all strange things and you may feel in worst situation than this.

Think again...

All the best

Amresh Mishra
Behavioral, Sales, Customer Care & Leadership Coach
6th October 2009 From India, Delhi
My dear Ram

Your story sounds too familiar and so, I know its genuine.

I have more than 20 years of experience in HRM; yet I shall not advise you about "changing/reforming" the boss, the owner of a private limited company.

Human nature is the most difficult thing to change (though, not impossible); considering it is a product of personality (which again is too complex), attitude, belief, behaviour etc.

Owners of private limited companies, behave exactly the way you have written. they are the "maliks" and people who get salary from him are 'slaves'. They do not have any respect even for the labour laws of the country. They can buy the officials and politicians, so they go along their way merrily, without the least concern for people like you.

You can flourish and grow fast under such dictatorship, if you say "yes, boss" with every sentence, praise them sky high and are willing in general, to 'lick their boots'.

But my assessment of you indicate that you are an upright, a real "human" resource manager. Else, you would not have felt uncomfortable with such a situation.

Dear friend, I have only one suggestion - do your best to move off as fast as you can. You can handle the Interview. Tell the truth, without sounding harsh or bitter; just that "I feel I can not give my best under such restraining, un-healthy working environment."

Be confident, if it is a good company; they will definitely hire you;

if it is a bad company; then let them not hire you - because you are already in one.

Warm regards.
6th October 2009 From India, Delhi
Good Gal Ash has given you a very nice, detailed overview of the reality.
A Bad Boss is very often the resaon why employees tend to want to move on.
Yes Son, time has come for you to explore other avenues...there's no point in languishing in your present set up.
Getting up with a lousy feeling, "Oh Shit!, I have to go to work" and you arrive there with a heavy crestfallen state...its no use carrying on and damaging your own self in the bargain.
Like Ash said, you are young and there's actually no point in even trying to persuade your Boss to change...just look around, find another job and move on.
Best Wishes,
Vasant Nair
7th October 2009 From India, Mumbai
Hi Ram,
Look if things are so bad which is as a matter of fact, then look for othe option but DONT leave your current job without getting another job at hand. Yes the best reason for looking for change would be "I want to utilize my skills and enhance it among my employees". I would also suggest once if you get your job, pls highlight the same to the higher managment authority. That does not mean you need degrade your immediate Boss, but you need to highlight the problems which the company is facing in large. In the the employeesa re getting affected. Long way to go Ram....you will succeed. Take Care.
7th October 2009 From India, Mumbai
Dear Ram
Start looking for other job.
Till then handle boss as practice to handle difficult people.
Every difficult behaviour have motives ,Criteria.
Know those of your boss and handle him ,the best possible way.
Till the new job take a chance to learn how to handle such boss.
All the best for New job,You will Difinitely get better job.
Because every body get chance.
Pratap Kamble
7th October 2009 From India, Pune
Dear Ram,

Ihave read all the Sr and Jr feedback on your comment and just want to say you that how many times do you make changes in your career.

Present boss with whom you are working he may be wrong with you at this movement and why dont you recollect the data of your past experience with the same boss. was he behaved with you in past as like as now, if so then try to handle and gain his attitude and stay with the samy comp.... if he is not like that then there is problem with you...so try to make changes in your attitude....

C i dont want to discourage you and even dont want to encourage you for change with your present profile, as you have worked with him since 10 months what you have gained......and what you have lost.....

C chaning is not the solution to run awaywith hectic pressure, if so what guarante that in your future endeavours you will not find such kind boss again, then what wil be aspects towards this....do you again look for change...Hard work Have fun and Create History..just follow this and rock your self....
8th October 2009 From India, Hyderabad
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