Shaki
E-hr, Digital Hr, Hris, Training & Development,
Bala1
Sr Project Manager
Soms23
Hr Manager
Sunayna
Handwriting Analysis, Employee Relations,
Thesysthink
Project Management, Client Engagement, Revenue
Sreenivasan
Student - Hr Professional
Manu
Web Administrator
Jayasreerangarajan
Seaching For Job
Pallavi
Hr Professional
Nivedhitha
Hr Executive

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Does your Company have a problem in recruiting the right person for the right chair? If yes, try this simple experiment. Put around 100 bricks in some particular order in a closed room with an open window. Then send 2-3 candidates into the room and close it from outside. Leave them alone and come back after 6 hours, and then analyze the situation

If they are counting and recounting the number of bricks

- PUT THEM IN THE ACCOUNTS DEPT.

If they have messed up the whole place with the bricks

- PUT THEM IN ENGINEERING.

If they are arranging the bricks in some other order

- PUT THEM IN PLANNING.

If they are throwing the bricks at each other

- PUT THEM IN OPERATIONS.

If they are sleeping

- PUT THEM IN SECURITY.

If they have broken the bricks into pieces

- PUT THEM IN INFORMATION TECHNOLOGY.

If they are sitting idle

- PUT THEM IN HUMAN RESOURCE DEPT.

If they have thrown the bricks out of the window

- PUT THEM IN THE MATERIALS DEPT.

If they have already left for the day

- PUT THEM IN MARKETING.

AND last but not least....

If they are talking to each other and not a brick has moved

-PUT THEM IN TOP MANAGEMEN

From India, Mumbai
good one sunayan. i ahve read this message before. but i want u to tell one thing if it is practically possible? just i donot know that.... ok tell me byee
From India, Vadodara
Hi Sunayna
Thought of adding some more from office jokes... instead of starting a new string .....
__________________________________________________ __________
What if Accountants start producing movies?????
1. Munnabhai B.Com
2. Hamara Ledger Aapke Paas Hai
3. Kaho na Depreciation Hai
4. Journal Se Balance Sheet Tak
5. Kabhi Credit Kabhi Debit
6. Cash Balance Wale Profit Le Jayenge
7. Hum Tax de Chuke Sanam
8. Kya Yehi Credit Period Hai?
9. Mein Accounts ki Diwani Hoon
10. Kyon Tally Ho Gaya Na
__________________________________________________ __________
Ajmal Mirza

From India, Ahmadabad
lol.......obviously not sreenivasan.... :lol: hi ajmal...thnk u for enhancing my thread with ur joke.... wonder wt will happen if the HR ppl decide to make movies. :wink:
From India, Mumbai
it will be like rok saka tho rok lo, since arindham chaudry my college dean directon movie a great great flop.. he is HR person who talks about leadershiop in his workshopp..
each person suits for some job...
so Hr is not for movie till we try to adapt and change for that circumstance..

From India, Vadodara
How does a new recruit in IT industry feel
Ek Trainee tha anjana sa.........
coding karne se woh darta tha.......
Copy paste karte, idhar udhar se.......
pooch ke coding kiya karta tha.......
Choree choree.....chupke chupke......
discussions mein soya karta tha.....
Jab delivery honee hotee thee.....
raat raat bhar jagta tha.....
Kuch aata nahee tha usko.....
jane kaise deliver karta tha.....
Jab bhee milta tha kisee doosre developer se,
unse poocha karta tha.......
Coding kaisee hotee hai.......
Yeh Coding kaisee hotee hai.......?
Aur voh developers
bas yahee kah paate the....
"Ankhe khulee ho ya ho band
deedar code ka hota hai....
kaise kahoo mai o yaro
yeh code kaise hota hai.....
"Kya hai yeh jadoo hai koyee code jo chal jata hai,
fix karke bugs hazaro deliver ho jata hai...."
"Door kahee onsite per, hote hai yeh sare faisla,
kaun jane koyee bug kab kaise kaha mile,
Jiske naseeb mein ho likha
acceptance useeka hota hai....
kaise kahoon mai o yara yeh code
kaise chalta hai.....

From India, Ahmadabad
Hey sunayna.. Can you change the topic to something related to office jokes... we can collect a lot more on subject... :evil:
From India, Ahmadabad
Hi Sunayna...
Thanks for changing the Title of the post... and Congratulations for finding a new home [Sunayna = CHR Resident]
THE TEN OFFICE COMMANDMENTS
I. Thou Shalt Have No Other Life Beside Work
II. Thou Shalt Not Download Any Craven Images
III. Thou Shalt Not Take the Name of The Manager Thy God in Vain
IV. Remember the Sabbath Day to Work and Keep it Holy
V. Honor Thy Punctuality and Confidentiality Agreements
VI. Thou Shalt Not Kill Time
VII. Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery On Office Furniture or Equipment
VIII. Thou Shalt Not Steal Thy Employer's Yellow Sticky-Notes
IX. Thou Shalt Not Wantonly Xerox Thy Posterior
X. Thou Shalt Not Covet Thy Neighbor's Cubicle, Nor His Stapler, Nor His Three-Hole Punch

From India, Ahmadabad
ur very welcome
ya...cool na?
nice to know i hav a back up house if i need one
but i hope i dont have to pack n shift, coz packin sux
n adding one more commandement
XI ) thou shalt continue workin n not decrease ur productivity in the later half of the day
i m sure vishal will definitely agree with this. :wink:

From India, Mumbai
Love Veer Zara Songs... Then this is for you

Main Employ number ****

cubicle ke dewaron ke us paar dekhta hoon

apni hi tarah

khaali baithe ek colleague ko dekhta hoon

kabhi mail karta

kabhi chat kaarta

kabhi mobile pe baat karta





woh kehte hain woh GM hai

woh kehte hain woh senior hai

fir kyon mere jaisa lagta hai

kyon din bhar Fw: padhta hai





Main Employ number ****

cubicle ki dewaron ke us paar dekhta hoon

cabin me baithe apne GM ko dekhta hoon

kabhi phone pe

kabhi con-call pe

gussa utarta jaane kis pe



who kehte hain project aane wala hai

training complete karo , kaam aane wala hai

fir kyon mujhe yeh jhootha sa lagta hai

fir kyon yeh sapna sa lagta hai





Main Employ number ****

cubicle ke dewaron ke us paar dekhta hoon

Doosri companiyon ko join kar chuke

purane doston ko dekhta hoon



woh kehte hain bond ka kya hai, chale jao

woh kehte hain kahin aur kismat aazmao

fir kyon bond todne se dil darta hai

abhi ek saal aur intezaar

karne ko jee karta hai

Main Employ number ****

cubicle ki dewaron ke us paar dekhta hoon

From India, Ahmadabad

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