Hi, I am 34 years old working in MNC. I am came from very low job profile to this extent. I have no issues talking over phone or in conference.
I am getting stage fear when i need to talk in very small or large crowd espectially in Conference Room. During the crowd iam not to able to express my complete thought and i am becoming complete nervous.
I tried many ways to overcome like taking long breath, taking enough water before the meeting starts, talking infront of mirror in separate Room, showing my speech in front of my wife but still all my initiative will fail when i see large crowd or even small crowd espectially if i need to talk.
This stage fear and talking in crowd or in meeting, i having this problem from my childhood, may be from my school days. I am always afraid even talking to teachers from my childhood. not sure to blame my school which i studied .
I want to recover completly from this fear. Pls suggest the best ways which i will follow sincerely.
Do i need to contact pysicatrist to recover or do i need to attend any intensive Fear management training classes or what shall i need to do since this is from my Birth.
Pls help me to overcome this with your sincere advise
Thanks
S.Kumar
From India
I am getting stage fear when i need to talk in very small or large crowd espectially in Conference Room. During the crowd iam not to able to express my complete thought and i am becoming complete nervous.
I tried many ways to overcome like taking long breath, taking enough water before the meeting starts, talking infront of mirror in separate Room, showing my speech in front of my wife but still all my initiative will fail when i see large crowd or even small crowd espectially if i need to talk.
This stage fear and talking in crowd or in meeting, i having this problem from my childhood, may be from my school days. I am always afraid even talking to teachers from my childhood. not sure to blame my school which i studied .
I want to recover completly from this fear. Pls suggest the best ways which i will follow sincerely.
Do i need to contact pysicatrist to recover or do i need to attend any intensive Fear management training classes or what shall i need to do since this is from my Birth.
Pls help me to overcome this with your sincere advise
Thanks
S.Kumar
From India
Dear Sir,
Pls do not rate ur self so low.
U know when willam shakespare was called on stage first time , he spoke the 14 words only.
and it seems u have much potential then him.
Pls try to overcome it by taking the help of mirror or take the family help or friends.
Becoz, training classes are not feasible for all this.
U know when i passed my school, i wasn't able to speak a single word in english.
But i tried hard to get rid of this and finally i can answer in english.
Pls be confident. kNow ur skills.
I hope u will improve very soon.
My best wishes are with u.
Regards
Vipin :icon1::icon1:
From India, New Delhi
32Pls do not rate ur self so low.
U know when willam shakespare was called on stage first time , he spoke the 14 words only.
and it seems u have much potential then him.
Pls try to overcome it by taking the help of mirror or take the family help or friends.
Becoz, training classes are not feasible for all this.
U know when i passed my school, i wasn't able to speak a single word in english.
But i tried hard to get rid of this and finally i can answer in english.
Pls be confident. kNow ur skills.
I hope u will improve very soon.
My best wishes are with u.
Regards
Vipin :icon1::icon1:
From India, New Delhi
Dear Sir,
Pls do not rate ur self so low.
U know when willam shakespare was called on stage first time , he spoke 14 words only.
and it seems u have much potential then him.
Pls try to overcome it by taking the help of mirror or take the family help or friends.
Becoz, training classes are not feasible for all this.
U know when i passed my school, i wasn't able to speak a single word in english.
But i tried hard to get rid of this and finally i can answer in english.
Pls be confident. kNow ur skills.
I hope u will improve very soon.
My best wishes are with u.
Regards
Vipin :icon1::icon1:
From India, New Delhi
Pls do not rate ur self so low.
U know when willam shakespare was called on stage first time , he spoke 14 words only.
and it seems u have much potential then him.
Pls try to overcome it by taking the help of mirror or take the family help or friends.
Becoz, training classes are not feasible for all this.
U know when i passed my school, i wasn't able to speak a single word in english.
But i tried hard to get rid of this and finally i can answer in english.
Pls be confident. kNow ur skills.
I hope u will improve very soon.
My best wishes are with u.
Regards
Vipin :icon1::icon1:
From India, New Delhi
Immediate and quick way -
Focus on your boss.
Talk to your boss / close friend directly in conference meeting him eye to eye for next two/three conferences. In the fourth conference your focus will be out of your boss / close friend as questions will be out from every corner, by the time you would had your confidence in conference. Things come up by practice.
I am a trainer for 6-7 years now, still I get excited when I see crowd. I can boldly say I call this stage fear. But once I start this is out for my focus is not crowd but on my delivery and reach of my delivery.
Select 5-10 people whom you want to impress in the conference and focus on your delivery to impress them as such you are talking directly to them. You will be out of this.
Most important - Never hide you are scared or excited or lost connectivity. If some one breaks your flow, call the person by name, and crack as a joke that he broke your flow. If you are scared, say at the opening, "Yes, I am scared, and excuse me if I shiver". Even if you shiver, it will be normal for others.
From India, Madras
Focus on your boss.
Talk to your boss / close friend directly in conference meeting him eye to eye for next two/three conferences. In the fourth conference your focus will be out of your boss / close friend as questions will be out from every corner, by the time you would had your confidence in conference. Things come up by practice.
I am a trainer for 6-7 years now, still I get excited when I see crowd. I can boldly say I call this stage fear. But once I start this is out for my focus is not crowd but on my delivery and reach of my delivery.
Select 5-10 people whom you want to impress in the conference and focus on your delivery to impress them as such you are talking directly to them. You will be out of this.
Most important - Never hide you are scared or excited or lost connectivity. If some one breaks your flow, call the person by name, and crack as a joke that he broke your flow. If you are scared, say at the opening, "Yes, I am scared, and excuse me if I shiver". Even if you shiver, it will be normal for others.
From India, Madras
M r. Jalasayanan, I liked your tips to become true about our weaknesses, it really works and converts your weaknesses to strengths. VK
From India, Indore
From India, Indore
Hi Kumar,
Everyone of us have stage fright.It's always controlled.As Vipin has said never under estimate yourself dear friend..nobody is a born speaker niether born great..so here you go...you know... you are your own phsycatrist cos u know urself better than others do...
Infact you are doing half of that is needed already.(all those pre-preparation stuff you have mentioned above..good keep it up n keep going the same way)..now this is what you can try before the begining of your presentation/speech(since its at ur worplace):
(Shhhhhh....come closer wanna whisper a secret..u know what Kumar I have observed these trainers closely during my trainings at my workplace..this what they do....)
1.Adding to the abovesaid just keep visualizing urself as delivering the presentation/speech from the previous day.Imagine that you r chatting there with them.comfort yourself.
before you go jus ask urself who in that entire group knows what u r going to say..the answer would be "no"
2.Now that u know the material/content get familiar with the audience/room/conference hall.reach before others could arrive.Just relax there,go around the room,drink water if needed,sing a song or hum a little to urself,speak to ppl who arrive early there,watch things around you..it mite even help u to give an opening:idea: try to create a rapport
3.Once you are started...get personal now ..u can start with jokes related to ur content/presentation/current situation/a friendly question eg..is evrybody doing/present here gud etc(never apologise your nervousness)If u tremble stand beside a table or chair or magnetic board in the begining.once a friendly atmosphere is felt start walking around(hey dnt forget to chek your A/v equipment)
4.Make every possible eye contact..consider the group to be one person.jus think of the ways u can gain their eye contact/attention when u deliver the content.this way the size of the audience is shrunk..so it wil be like a chat for u.
So, friend next time apart from all the preparations....say to yourself..I WILL GO OUT THERE N HAVE FUN.WILL GIVE MY BEST.....u know ur fears will automatically change into your positive strenghts>once you are out there u will be at ease...
hope this is of some help to you...GO OUT DO ALL THAT U CAN COS U R GONNA IMPRESS THEM KUMAR!!!!!!!!
From India, Mumbai
Everyone of us have stage fright.It's always controlled.As Vipin has said never under estimate yourself dear friend..nobody is a born speaker niether born great..so here you go...you know... you are your own phsycatrist cos u know urself better than others do...
Infact you are doing half of that is needed already.(all those pre-preparation stuff you have mentioned above..good keep it up n keep going the same way)..now this is what you can try before the begining of your presentation/speech(since its at ur worplace):
(Shhhhhh....come closer wanna whisper a secret..u know what Kumar I have observed these trainers closely during my trainings at my workplace..this what they do....)
1.Adding to the abovesaid just keep visualizing urself as delivering the presentation/speech from the previous day.Imagine that you r chatting there with them.comfort yourself.
before you go jus ask urself who in that entire group knows what u r going to say..the answer would be "no"
2.Now that u know the material/content get familiar with the audience/room/conference hall.reach before others could arrive.Just relax there,go around the room,drink water if needed,sing a song or hum a little to urself,speak to ppl who arrive early there,watch things around you..it mite even help u to give an opening:idea: try to create a rapport
3.Once you are started...get personal now ..u can start with jokes related to ur content/presentation/current situation/a friendly question eg..is evrybody doing/present here gud etc(never apologise your nervousness)If u tremble stand beside a table or chair or magnetic board in the begining.once a friendly atmosphere is felt start walking around(hey dnt forget to chek your A/v equipment)
4.Make every possible eye contact..consider the group to be one person.jus think of the ways u can gain their eye contact/attention when u deliver the content.this way the size of the audience is shrunk..so it wil be like a chat for u.
So, friend next time apart from all the preparations....say to yourself..I WILL GO OUT THERE N HAVE FUN.WILL GIVE MY BEST.....u know ur fears will automatically change into your positive strenghts>once you are out there u will be at ease...
hope this is of some help to you...GO OUT DO ALL THAT U CAN COS U R GONNA IMPRESS THEM KUMAR!!!!!!!!
From India, Mumbai
Hi,
Stage fear is common among most of the people. This can be avoided through various self preparatory exercises.
1. Be confident and keep yourself understood that you are the master of the topic you speak in the stage.
2. I would suggest you to stand in front of the mirror and read some articles or newspaper for atleast 15 to 30 minutes daily. This will help you to build your confidence and to my knowledge, stage fear is also a outcome of the fear of your voice in the closed auditorium.
3. Practice yourself before you get in to the stage.
Hope this might help you out. Finally, i would suggest you not to let your motivation down which will in turn make you small in the group and automatically would take you to a fear in the stage
Regards
K.Jayavel
From India, Madras
Stage fear is common among most of the people. This can be avoided through various self preparatory exercises.
1. Be confident and keep yourself understood that you are the master of the topic you speak in the stage.
2. I would suggest you to stand in front of the mirror and read some articles or newspaper for atleast 15 to 30 minutes daily. This will help you to build your confidence and to my knowledge, stage fear is also a outcome of the fear of your voice in the closed auditorium.
3. Practice yourself before you get in to the stage.
Hope this might help you out. Finally, i would suggest you not to let your motivation down which will in turn make you small in the group and automatically would take you to a fear in the stage
Regards
K.Jayavel
From India, Madras
Dear Jalasayanan Very good tips...hope this will resolve the problem...its nothing wrong to admit if you are weak in certain aspects.... Regards valli
From India, Bangalore
From India, Bangalore
Dear
Be confident while doing things.. never try to impress anyone by your speech.. deliver your speech normally.. and as jalasayan has quoted.. please admit your weakness.. that will help you out...keep the concept in you mind and put it in you own words..Quote some examples along with that will make to deliver your speach confidently.. relax well before going to have a meeting with your team.. note all the topics that are to be discussed with your team members in the meeting... this will also help you out....
Regards
Valli
From India, Bangalore
Be confident while doing things.. never try to impress anyone by your speech.. deliver your speech normally.. and as jalasayan has quoted.. please admit your weakness.. that will help you out...keep the concept in you mind and put it in you own words..Quote some examples along with that will make to deliver your speach confidently.. relax well before going to have a meeting with your team.. note all the topics that are to be discussed with your team members in the meeting... this will also help you out....
Regards
Valli
From India, Bangalore
Hi Kumar,
I was jotting points in my mind to suggest... but after reading the last part of ur statement - I fel it was more important to let u know that:
"This is not a grave failure that u have to consider a psychiatrist"
Do you know that ppl who understand that they have an area to improve and are open to listen - will emerge as true winners?
So - first - U have already succeeded in overcoming ur fear by asking for help.
Now here is what I can suggest:
U r ur best critic. Stand in front of a mirror and start introducing urself. Say abt urself aby what u achieved in 34 years, ur family, ur dreams. And when u r talking - see how confident u grow when u look into the eyes of the person in the mirror!
I know that the fear also lies in u, when ppl are looking at u and only u. U think - wat if I goof this? Wat If I dont communicate exactly wat I want to?
Again - prepare much prior to the meeting and jot down major points. Talk to ur critic in front of the mirror. Pre-invent questions that might pop up during the session and try answering it.
I suggest - read a lot. So that u dont run short of words to express what u have. Not always I spk what I have prepared. Sometimes we have to spk on the spot what comes in mind. Read The Hindu Editorial. (its gud).
I had this issue earlier:
I tried speaking in front of my mom n dad - and u know what?
I realized that, they r ppl who accept me the way I am, and so there is a confidence within me to talk loud and give the right gestures. And they - listen to me wholeheartedly.
When I talk to strangers - I find it difficult becos I dont know them. And I dont know wat they r thinking of me...
So - point noted here is: Introduce urself well to the group much in advance and try gettign to know more abt the ppl in ur group. Since its at work place - u must have the chance to know everyone. SO take time to talk to each of them.. find out what kind of ppl they are and their views. This would help u face all of them during the meeting - becos , u r talking to ppl u know.
If its a completely strange group - dont worry. Prepare a very gud introductory statement abt urself. Make it a very interactive session and ask them their views. In that way - u alone dont talk, everyone talks.
ANd remember - be loud and clear with words.
When I could do it, anyone can do it.
PS: If u were the audience, u will definitely not be interested in know how nervous I feel, but rather u will wait to see if I have a message to convey..
From India, Madras
I was jotting points in my mind to suggest... but after reading the last part of ur statement - I fel it was more important to let u know that:
"This is not a grave failure that u have to consider a psychiatrist"
Do you know that ppl who understand that they have an area to improve and are open to listen - will emerge as true winners?
So - first - U have already succeeded in overcoming ur fear by asking for help.
Now here is what I can suggest:
U r ur best critic. Stand in front of a mirror and start introducing urself. Say abt urself aby what u achieved in 34 years, ur family, ur dreams. And when u r talking - see how confident u grow when u look into the eyes of the person in the mirror!
I know that the fear also lies in u, when ppl are looking at u and only u. U think - wat if I goof this? Wat If I dont communicate exactly wat I want to?
Again - prepare much prior to the meeting and jot down major points. Talk to ur critic in front of the mirror. Pre-invent questions that might pop up during the session and try answering it.
I suggest - read a lot. So that u dont run short of words to express what u have. Not always I spk what I have prepared. Sometimes we have to spk on the spot what comes in mind. Read The Hindu Editorial. (its gud).
I had this issue earlier:
I tried speaking in front of my mom n dad - and u know what?
I realized that, they r ppl who accept me the way I am, and so there is a confidence within me to talk loud and give the right gestures. And they - listen to me wholeheartedly.
When I talk to strangers - I find it difficult becos I dont know them. And I dont know wat they r thinking of me...
So - point noted here is: Introduce urself well to the group much in advance and try gettign to know more abt the ppl in ur group. Since its at work place - u must have the chance to know everyone. SO take time to talk to each of them.. find out what kind of ppl they are and their views. This would help u face all of them during the meeting - becos , u r talking to ppl u know.
If its a completely strange group - dont worry. Prepare a very gud introductory statement abt urself. Make it a very interactive session and ask them their views. In that way - u alone dont talk, everyone talks.
ANd remember - be loud and clear with words.
When I could do it, anyone can do it.
PS: If u were the audience, u will definitely not be interested in know how nervous I feel, but rather u will wait to see if I have a message to convey..
From India, Madras
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