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nathraoOne needs to be broadminded and liberal.
Lunches are ways of informal interaction between team members.
Every one can afford to feed his family but such eating out once in a while are not to be viewed negatively at all.
This is my personal opinion.
From India, Pune
Dinesh DivekarDear Nick,
Gentleman cool down. You are so frustrated that it could impact your marital life. My take is as below:
a) IT companies exist in India for more than two and half decades. Every industry has its own culture and so is IT. Therefore, you should have thought of whether to have spouse from IT background or not before the marriage and not after.
b) Now you have accepted your wife from IT company. Therefore, this is fait accompli. Better to reconcile with it. If you tell her to change industry, it would be very difficult for her.
c) IT or otherwise, it is important to keep bosses in good humour. Living in water and being an enemy of the crocodile is not good goes the adage. One cannot succeed in the career merely on one's intelligence and dedication. Some amount of back up from top boss is always needed. As of now if her boss insists on compulsory attendance of team outing then be as it may. Let her attend these outings till she is in her existing company. Who knows team outings may not happen in her next company.
d) Team outings happen in each industry. Possibly in your wife's company, frequency could be little higher. By the way, what is the frequency of team outings so that you have taken them to your heart?
d) Whims and fancies of bosses are there in each industry. Therefore, singling out any particular industry would not be fair.
e) Economic liberalization of India started in 1991. Lot of MNCs entered to do their business in India. On the flip side, these MNCs brought their own culture particularly American culture. Now we are neither completely American nor Indian. Your generation is victim of this hybrid culture.
f) Lower and middle class benefited most from the economic liberalization. Money started flowing in their homes which their forefathers had not seen. Nevertheless, money has diluted Indianness in them. But then dilution of Indian culture started when Mohammad Bin Kasim invaded India in 712 A.D. It has been continuing ever since.
Final Comments: - My humble request is not to allow your wife's profession to impact your marital life. Spouse's support is required most after 60. But then one has to spend almost 30-35 years before one attains that age. Therefore, look at the larger picture. Lastly, you have expressed your views. What about your spouse's views? Is she in favour of team outing or against it? Many things depend on her psyche as well.
From India, Bangalore