Dear Vijayan, It would have been useful to know with what comments by whom you do not agree and why.
From United Kingdom
Dear ABCD.....
Boss is Boss and they are always right.
Boss may be He/ She. Never mind.
As you grow, you may also adopt such qualities,.....unknowingly.
It is very easy to find flaws in others, try to see their good qualities.
Try to adopt their good qualities and implement them.
You will see a sence of satisfaction in your working.
Thanks/ Regards,

From India, Delhi
Dear ABC, I will not agree with your opinion thier should not be any gender bias whether they are male or female "Boss is always Boss". With Regards Hima
From India, Bangalore
Dear Mr.Nashbramhal
The word "Egoistical" about an acadamically sound & a professionally graduate lady leader, can not be accepted.
Every leader may have some or the other problems, which can not mix up with their profession.
Sorry if I am wrong.

So well explained by Umakanthan.M Please take your Boss as a neuter gender rather than male or female.Gender bifurcations like this show how unfit we are for this developing society.
From India, Madgaon
Dear Vijayan,
Thank you for pointing out with which comment you disagree and why. However, I have to point out that, I have not said anywhere that it is acceptable. In fact, I have asked for clarification of what "egoistical" means and how it was exhibited.

From United Kingdom
Dear colleague,
Execllnt comments, views by all. Thanks to everone.First of all, this is not a case of gender bias as I feel. Work schedule is very tight. 24X7 manufacturing unit and a complete Desi company with global prensence of very reputed products in India. Excellnt working condition but when to face some IR issues/ critical events instead of attending forced the HR person to attend who has base line experiences in dealing with people and even it is mentioned specifically in KRA. A total of 21 persons in HR department ( including Time Office) where another 11 female employees which inudes T&D Manager, IR Manager ( female). Last year's attrition rate is 1.4%, 6 Mandays of Training. Almost everything is quite good with HR department. Could be an exception if other senior person also were asked to attend IR issue/ criitical events. Solution needed why only this HR person, always.

From India, New Delhi
Dear ABC8708,
You do not sem to have answered my questions. Could you please combine all your messages and give us a summary list of points like I have done in my post so that we could focus on the key issue you are raising.
Thanking you in advance.

From United Kingdom
Dear ABC8708,

In all your posts, I don't think you have managed to narrate your actual grievance!

Your initial question was: "How to deal with lady HR boss?"

Firstly it seems gender biased, but you are saying it is not! Then you are saying she is highly qualified, well acknowledged in the firm, handling the responsibilities well, but may have egoestic/stubborn approach, & might have crucified some of her employees to cope up with some HR issues.

As per my understanding; You do not approve this behavior from your boss any way, But your grievance slightly differs, considering her being a lady. You are ready to give some allowances for this fact that she may had to act more strictly, being in a male dominated world.

Then tell me……

In day to day interactions, Would you have reacted differently to your boss, if your boss was a gentleman, with same ego, attitude & background?

In day to day interactions with your employees, as a HR representative, do you behave differently towards lady/gentleman employees?

Please retrospect your quotes in earlier posts & answer these questions. If the answer to both the questions come as "No", then we can proceed ahead!

A person's general nature / their own life issues / their ambitions & their ability to use politics at work CANNOT be changed by the HR. That’s not the function of HR.

You may have known/heard the issues in her life, but please accept that, as HR you cannot solve them.

It’s a different thing, if you are friends & want to help, go ahead, ......but then you wouldn’t have faced the original question.

If her approach is not hampering the department / organization, then you have to accept her as is & have to learn the real reasons behind some of the decisions made. If her approach is really hampering the department, then you can surely report to higher management, but you have to be very sure (with statistics) about that!

In my opinion, best way to deal with such persons is to:

1. Be clear in all communications. Don’t assume anything. Don’t keep anything verbal/ambiguous.

2. Keep the communication both ways. Don’t just listen, also react.

3. Be professional & keep the interactions to minimum as required.

4. Share the same goal for organizational benefit, when working together.

5. If you still cannot take it, work towards moving the boss out of the organization/equation, or moving yourself out of the organization… (just kidding…. :-)

Best Regards,


Dear ABC8708,
From your brief narration of the boss's achievements, behaviour, successful handling of her job for so long, there appears a doubt about your parochial attitude or indigestion in working with lady boss rather than the other way round. Pls introspect and see her dealings with others and others opinion of her.
I hv a suggestion - if you are close to this bali-ka-bhakra person, ask him to hv a one to one talk with her or take one of the seniors' help to understand, develop rapport and reach expectations. Pls avoid mud slinging in such fora - some of colleagues may be reading this & watching you!!!

From India, Mumbai

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