sudarshanmurthy
Dear All,
I am feeling very low,depressed,past grudges and always negative about life and the outlook.My social relationships are poor and i feel lonely and sad.Please help me how to get out of negative things and have a peaceful,happy and quiet life.This being bothering me for a long time.

From India, Bangalore
nashbramhall
1624

Dear Sudarshan,
I knew a person who felt tlike that. Kindly get your Serotonin level checked and take some medication. It will help. Kindly see Serotonin and Depression: 9 Questions and Answers
Also kindly give more details about what you do andwhat your past grudges are. This happens to people when we bottle up our feelings and do not bring it to the open. For example, a person may have bottled up how he felt as a boy/girl when growing up; problems with parents, feeling of unfairly treated when compared to siblings or having problems with friends, etc.
The more you express your feelings the better; that is getting things off the chest.
Wish you all the best.
Have a nice day
Simhan
Leaning and Teaching Fellow (Retd)
The University of Bolton, UK
Chief Advisor, Promentor-consulting

From United Kingdom
palani.murthy
10

Hi Sudharsan,
This type of situation exists in the life of all.Any how we have to get over those.
For social life - Read 6THINKING HATS & HOW TO HAVE A BEAUTIFUL MIND by Edward De Bono.If u read these 2 books,then u'll get the abillity to guide others...
Best Wishes...
:-)

From United States
CHR
660

The best way to start being at peace about your social relations is by doing these few things:
* Make friends is by sharing a "secret" or a "story" about yourself.
* Try to frame your mind to focus on how you can be more involved, give more to any social gathering.
* When you are organizing an event - try to give one on one time to everyone - even if it's just a few seconds.
* Talk about what the other person is doing - then share what you did in that space - never criticize - be enthusiastic.
* Never ever criticize people - you can put forward your opinion but never bring the other person down!
* As Simhan suggested - get medical help - many times it's a deficiency or some malfunctioning glands.
* Finally, get over the idea that you need to be "liked"... you need to be useful and generous.
Regards,
Sid [CHR]

From India, Gurgaon
nashbramhall
1624

Please watch discourses by Swami Anubhavananda at The Experience of Just Being Happiness 2 1a of 2 @ Hamburg 2009 00018 1 - YouTube It has helped me a lot, after my nephew introduced me to one of his DVDs.
If you have time to listen, a longer version (about 1 hour) session on "Happiness is a creative force & bitterness is a distructive force" presented in Auckland, in 2009, is available at Happiness is a creative force & bitterness is a distructive force @ Auckland 2009 - YouTube

From United Kingdom
suneeldara
6

Dear Friend Sudarshanmurthy!
Good Morning. This is Suneel. you must realize yourself that you are the HERO in your life.
Directions to Get Peace of Mind in life:
1. Read Swami Vivekananda his call to the nation. (book)
"You are the creater of your own destiny'.
"If you want to peace of mind, do not find faults in anyone rather see your own faults"
-Swami Vivekanada
2. Watch Motivational movies and stories.
3. download "Impact 2011 by Gampa Nageswara Rao at Ramakrishna Math, Hyderabad. videos from Youtube.com
All the best,
Suneel
Hyderabad.

From India, Hyderabad
IG2011
Dear Sudharshan,
You seem to have lot in your mind which if you discuss with someone close to you might help you a bit.
Second thing is try to focus on daily activities : Start doing some kind of excercise like walking in early morning listening to music, swimming etc ,
Eat proper food because generally people with these kind of feelings will not be taking food properly which will spoil their health
Keep yourself busy as idle mind is devil's workshop....
Just do anything which relax your mind.......
Follow this principle : "EAT WELL, RELAX YOUR MIND AND KEEP YOURSELF HAPPY" :)
Hope this helps for now...i am sure you will be out of your depression if this keeps on continuing then see a Dr...
Regds,
IG

From India, Madras
ArthG
Hi,
Concentration will hepl you in great deal. However you have to pull your self out of such depression.First of all you need to prepare yourself that you want to get out of it.
More over you sholud be happy, there is no use in being sad. Every one has ups and downs in life and every one has to learns from such situations rather than being upset and sit ideal. Be bold and face with the wolrd with lots of courage and challenge.
Every mornig wake up in the mornning and look at mirror and smile and promise your BEFRIEND that you will be happy the entire day and try to keep your promise.

From India, Mumbai
anil.arora
663

Nice discussion but let me remind you all that this is not the right place for this kind of things. ..This is a professional place...I respect all the suggestions and helpful & kind advices to him but we must not forget the truth of this place.

Mr. Sudarshanmurthy, you can go to suggestion you have provided by the most respectful member and seniors here else need to consult a good psychiatrist and try to look positive things of life.

You know what is your main problem here is that you have had bad experience in your life and forget to see toward the positivity, beauty and colorful life.

You are alone and worried about your social relationship but have you ever tried to find out the reason of the same. Why you have not social life or good relationships, what are the reasons behind your loneliness and what you did to overcome this situation. I cant believe in this world, one cant have friends. No one can be sure or say that he/she has no friends until he/she dont wanna make friends or have a social life/relationships.

Or you are upset bcz you have lost someone or going through any breakup of something that put you this situation.

Ok now let me offer my friendship first. You can contact me at , Let me be your friend and i promise you will never feel alone in this world but promise to yourself first that you will ask yourself what you did, why you did and what you need to do to overcome from your bad situations.

There is only you who can help yourself, rest all can just advise you, suggest you to do this and that but ultimately you have to do all at your own.

A friends is waiting for your response. what say, wanna be my friend...

I again request you all and wanna say that this is a professional place and we need to remember this always..

From India, Gurgaon
anujpatel1986
Don't think too much....just chill..........
we r the only the source ot creat the problem in our life. just cooldown and think without you no any problems generated so please just think positive and get the best and beautiful life for future...life is too short and sweet enjoy each and every situation happily......becouse smile dont the cost.......

From India
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