All those difficult people by Gayle Carson
Some people are Sherman Tanks. They'll roll right over you.
When they can't get it done, they scream and shout and jump up
and down. Subordinates respond, but out of fear and that's not
positive. Then there are snipers-people who wait in the wings
to give you that rifle shot and call you down when you make a
mistake. Those are antagonistic people too. Exploders who
appear to have no hostility in them at all, reach a certain point
and then blow up. Five minutes later they very often forget
what they even blew up about. Although they're not hostile
people, they appear to be.
Your staff needs to know there is predictability, that you'll
behave fairly, that you're not out to get them, that you'll
respond appropriately, and that the same method of treatment
is for everyone. One person should not get preferred treatment
for any reason. The main task os someone who tries to create
and maintain a disciplined environment is predictability.
Here are some specific steps that will help your staff work
more effectively:
1. State your expectations. You cannot tell someone what to
do unless you give them the reasons the job needs to be done,
what the results are, what you expect of them, when it's due,
what it should contain and why it's necessary. You may have
thought this all out in your head, but your people don't
necessarily understand. Let them know where you stand.
2. Summarize. Remember that you need something repeated
six times before you hear it. Because their minds are on
something else, they'll forget what you have said.
3. Get feedback. Ask the person to repeat what you've said.
What they've heard is not necessarily what you've told them.
They've heard it based on what's going on in their mind.
4. Make sure you have the person repeat back to you what
they hear you're expecting. Say to them, "Is this what I
understand you to say?" Many times you hear what they are
saying to you differently. This will avoid a lot of crossed
communication.
Some people are Sherman Tanks. They'll roll right over you.
When they can't get it done, they scream and shout and jump up
and down. Subordinates respond, but out of fear and that's not
positive. Then there are snipers-people who wait in the wings
to give you that rifle shot and call you down when you make a
mistake. Those are antagonistic people too. Exploders who
appear to have no hostility in them at all, reach a certain point
and then blow up. Five minutes later they very often forget
what they even blew up about. Although they're not hostile
people, they appear to be.
Your staff needs to know there is predictability, that you'll
behave fairly, that you're not out to get them, that you'll
respond appropriately, and that the same method of treatment
is for everyone. One person should not get preferred treatment
for any reason. The main task os someone who tries to create
and maintain a disciplined environment is predictability.
Here are some specific steps that will help your staff work
more effectively:
1. State your expectations. You cannot tell someone what to
do unless you give them the reasons the job needs to be done,
what the results are, what you expect of them, when it's due,
what it should contain and why it's necessary. You may have
thought this all out in your head, but your people don't
necessarily understand. Let them know where you stand.
2. Summarize. Remember that you need something repeated
six times before you hear it. Because their minds are on
something else, they'll forget what you have said.
3. Get feedback. Ask the person to repeat what you've said.
What they've heard is not necessarily what you've told them.
They've heard it based on what's going on in their mind.
4. Make sure you have the person repeat back to you what
they hear you're expecting. Say to them, "Is this what I
understand you to say?" Many times you hear what they are
saying to you differently. This will avoid a lot of crossed
communication.
Dear friends,
Namaskar.
In one forum I made a statement that Lord Buddha is believed to be the 9th incarnation of God . A member claiming to be well versed in Buddhism, Hinduism and Sanskrit contradicted it based on his knowledge in Buddhist's sutra. I replied that I can quote authorites in my favour but that would not resolve the issue. More over it was a passing reference and wanted to concentrate on the topic of the thread. Then he said that what is the issue andThe Buddhist' s sutras are true historical documents
I ignored it by the reply that some one may reply.
Then he went on contradicting my posts in whichever thread he got. Despite my no reply he had at times provocative remarks. Till I had no replyto his posts. At one stage he made certain statements from Sanskrit text which were wrong. I asked to quote the reference. He evaded. Then I said that he was not in a position to cite the references. that is all. Then again he evaded. So again I repeated.......that is all. Then he came to a point of reply"that is all". Then no more he replied to any of my posts.
So you may find idiosyncratic imperialists anywhere. Beware of them.
Regards,
jogeshwar
From India, Delhi
174Namaskar.
In one forum I made a statement that Lord Buddha is believed to be the 9th incarnation of God . A member claiming to be well versed in Buddhism, Hinduism and Sanskrit contradicted it based on his knowledge in Buddhist's sutra. I replied that I can quote authorites in my favour but that would not resolve the issue. More over it was a passing reference and wanted to concentrate on the topic of the thread. Then he said that what is the issue andThe Buddhist' s sutras are true historical documents
I ignored it by the reply that some one may reply.
Then he went on contradicting my posts in whichever thread he got. Despite my no reply he had at times provocative remarks. Till I had no replyto his posts. At one stage he made certain statements from Sanskrit text which were wrong. I asked to quote the reference. He evaded. Then I said that he was not in a position to cite the references. that is all. Then again he evaded. So again I repeated.......that is all. Then he came to a point of reply"that is all". Then no more he replied to any of my posts.
So you may find idiosyncratic imperialists anywhere. Beware of them.
Regards,
jogeshwar
From India, Delhi
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Difficult People.ppt
How to work with Difficult People.pdf