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Amol Karmalkar
2

HI,

To All Married Couples and Singles Who Intend To Get Married

When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly. She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why? I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man!

That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; I had lost my heart to a lovely girl called Dew. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, 30% shares of my company and the car. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Dew so dearly.

Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Dew. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a months time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. She requested that everyday for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy.

Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Dew about my wife s divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully. My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset.

I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest.. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Dew about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily. Suddenly it hit me; she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart.

Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head. Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mum out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy. I drove to office... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind... I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished. Then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other any more. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death does us apart.

Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away. At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote:

"I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart"

The small details of our lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, the property, the bank balance that matters. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

If you don't share this, nothing will happen to you, but if you do, you just might save a marriage.

Relationships are made not to exploit, not to be broken.

We teach some by what we say

We teach some more by what we do

But we teach most by what we are

- Unknown

You don't get to choose how you are going to die, or when, but, you can decide how youare going to live, here and now.

Remember:

people will forget what you said ...

people will forget what you did ...

but people will never forget how you made them feel ...

"You Have To Learn Lessons Also From Others Mistakes Because you Will Not Get Time To Do All The Mistakes On Your Own

--

Happy moments, praise God.

Difficult moments, seek God.

Quiet moments, worship God

Painful moments, trust God

Every moment, thank God.

--

Regards,

Amol Karmalkar

98204-91219

Remember people, silent lips may avoid many problems, but smiling lips will solve many problems!

From India, Thana
shikhapathak
3

Dear Amol,
That's a beautiful story and it actually brought tears to me eye....tears of satisfaction that there are some things i am doing and then there are others that i need to take cre of....thank u for waiking me up...god bless u.
Thanks & regards,
Shikha

From Malaysia
chanchalag
1

Dear Amol, that was toooooo good. Its true in our busy schedules we start forgetting these valuable things which really matter in our lives Thks for the post, Chanchala
From India, Pune
vrr
Hi friend,

You are right , we tend to ignore the "the little things" that makes the life.They are really tender and delicate but can change lives,,,.In todays life where every one is a machine who is pushed by self or by others to give that extra productivity ,tends to forget to enjoy life with those 2-3 sould back at home who are always thinking of you or who are waiting to hear a sweet word from at the end of the day.But we under our work pressure forget and feel disturbed by their gestures and don't care to give the right response.It certainly hurts them a lot b'coz they have been waiting for us since morning for a good/kind/romantic/loving/caring/Iam there for you/kind of word...but ...we ..end up other way and become strangers ....

And My friend,

You owe your life to your wife,b'coz the way she handeled the issue was fantastic with out begging/requesting/fighting..but by making you realize the importance of those little moments we forget in our lives...

She had accepted your request for divorce(You Win) ,understood your need/and negotiated the best possible result...(WIN-WIN).

And as you said no luxury can match the warmth of say a phone call unexpectedly during a day and say darling..what 's special today..,a small praise..,..caring when the partner is not well even a cold /fever,..etc..

A topic to go on....I just wanted to put in What I felt...

Finally Love can change all ugly things to beautiful..b'coz"LOVE IS A DROP OF NECTAR FROM THE HEAVENS ABOVE INTO OUR LIVES TO MAKE OUR BITTER MOMENTS BETTER"

Rgds

Raj.

From India, Hyderabad
lisa isaac
11

Amol Absolutely true then how many will put this into action? We could have brought the current Indian divorce rate........if only people put words into actions Thanks Lisa
From India, Madras
SUSHMA RAWAT
20

A heart touch story thanks Amol. Yeah in the daily life sometime we don’t care about the long relationship and a new relation can attract us. Regards Sushma
From China, Beijing
alkakaushik
1

Hi Amol It was a wonderful post the mere words has touched me and i can visualise the transition of coldness to intimacy.... Beautiful idea.... Thanks Alka:)
From India, Calcutta
Rajeev Verma
77

Are Viral...........Kab Aye.......:?:????? Rang ka to aisa hai........ki dosti mein rah kar toda sa farak to padta hai........:icon6: :icon6: :-D
From India, Delhi
Viral Shah
11

Arre Amol baba shadi kar li??????? kab???? kisse??????? hume toh bulaya bhi nahi........where is my Party????????
From India, Mumbai
Amol Karmalkar
2

Dil pe mat le yaar dil pe mat le :-D........................ just joking :-P
Anytime when you feel comfortable .......................... iam always there for party :icon1:.................. saturday nite full tight ;)
Kabhi bhi aao you are always welcome :icon10:
let me know when you are planning :lol:
Regards
AK

From India, Thana
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