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Laugh please
Teacher :what happened in 1869? student:gandhi ji was born. teacher :what happened in 1873? student:gandhiji was four years old. question:what is the fullform of maths. anwser:mentaly affected teachers harrasing students teacher :because of gandhiji s hard work what do we get on 15th august. student:a holiday which is the pan in which we cannot fry something japan teacher :tomorrow there will be a lecture on sun.everyone must attend it. raju:no ma m i will not be able to attend it. teacher :why? raju:my mother will not allow me to go so far teacher:"can anyone give me an example of coincidence?" johnny:"sir my mother and father got married on the same day same time." teacher: how old is ur father. sunny:as old as i am. teacher:how is it possible? sunny:he became father only after i was born. teacher:there is a frogship is sinkingpotatoes cost rs 3/kg .thenwhat is my age? 32 yrs. teacher:how do you know? ellmy sister is 16 yrs old and she is half mad. student:to teacherma am my pen has run out of ink. teacher:go run after it. teacher:ramuget up.how can you sleep in my class? ramu:i can teacherif you keep your voice down. teacher: where does god live? little boy: i think he lives in our bathroom. teacher: why do you say that? little boy: well every morning my daddy bangs on the door and says 'god are you still in there?' teacher:"what is your name?". student:"mera naam suraj prakash hai." teacher:"when i ask aquestion in englishanswer it in english." student:"my name is sunlight."
~~~~ fifth student - a nice anecdote ~~~~~
A zen teacher saw five of his students return from the market riding their bicycles. when they had dismounted the teacher asked the students why are you riding your bicycles? the first student replied the bicycle is carrying this sack of potatoes. i am glad that i do not have to carry them on my back the teacher praised the student saying you are a smart boy. when you grow old you will not walk hunched over as i do. the second student replied i love to watch the trees and fields pass by as i roll down the path. the teacher commended the student your eyes are open and you see the world. the third student replied when i ride my bicycle i am content to chant nam myoho renge kyo. the teacher gave praise to the third student your mind will roll with the ease of a newly trued wheel. the fourth student answered riding my bicycle i live in harmony with all beings. the teacher was pleased and said you are riding on the golden path of nonharming. the fifth student replied i ride my bicycle to ride my bicycle. the teacher went and sat at the feet of the fifth student and said i am your disciple.
Tum bade hokar kya karoge ?
Fonteurostileteacher: tum bade hokar kya karoge ? student: shaadi.. teacher: nahi mera matlab hai kya banoge student: dulha. teacher: oh i mean bade hokar kya hasil karoge? student: dulhan teacher: mera matlab bade ho kar mummy papa k liye kya karoge? student bahu launga teacher: stupid tumhare papa tumse kya chahte hai? student: pota teacher: he bhagwan tumari zindagi ka kya maksad hai? student: hum do humare do jab tak teesra na ho left
Love & marraige ( its all about commitment).....
A student asks a teacher "what is love?" the teacher said "in order to answer your question go to the wheat field and choose the biggest wheat and come back. but the rule is: you can go through them only once and cannot turn back to pick." the student went to the field go thru first row he saw one big wheat but he wonders....may be there is a bigger one later. then he saw another bigger one... but may be there is an even bigger one waiting for him. later when he finished more than half of the wheat field he start to realize that the wheat is not as big as the previous one he saw he know he has missed the biggest one and he regretted. so he ended up went back to the teacher with empty hand. the teacher told him "...this is love... you keep looking for a better one but when later you realise you have already miss the person "what is marriage then?" the student asked. the teacher said "in order to answer your question go to the corn field and choose the biggest corn and come back. but the rule is: you can go through them only once and cannot turn back to pick." the student went to the corn field this time he is careful not to repeat the previous mistake when he reach the middle of the field he has picked one medium corn that he feel satisfy and come back to the teacher. the teacher told him "this time you bring back a corn.... you look for one that is just nice and you have faith and believe this is the best one you get.... this is marriage."
Soul mate...
Soul mate . . once upon a time there was a teacher and his student. one day they were lying down under a big tree on a grassy plain. then suddenly the student asked the teacher teacher i m confused how can i find my soulmate..? can you please help me..? teacher : silent for few seconds then he answered well; it s a pretty hard and easy question. student : thinking hard huh??? teacher : look that way there s a lot of grass there why don t you walk there but please never walk backward just walk straight ahead. on your way try to find a beautiful blade of grass and pick it up then give it to me. but just one blade of grass student : well ok then.. wait for me.. walked straight ahead on the grass field. a few minutes later.. student : i m back. teacher : erm well i don t see any beautiful blade of grass in your hand. student : on my journey i found a few beautiful blades of grass but each time i thought that i would find a better one so i didn t pick it up. but i didn t realize that i m at the end of the field and i hadn t picked up any. 'cause you told me not to go back so i didn t go back. teacher : that s what happens in real life.. what is the message of this story..? in looking for your soul mate please don t always compare and hope that there will be a better one. by doing that you ll waste your lifetime 'coz remember time never goes back". it applies similarly in finding your ideal life partner your suitable career or business opportunity.. the morale is : love & grab hold of the opportunity that you have. don t waste time now go & get it now . . .
Love vs. marriage
A good story love & marriage a student asks a teacher "what is love?" the teacher said "in order to answer your question go to the padi field and choose the biggest padi and come back. but the rule is: you can go through them only once and cannot turn back to pick." the student went to the field go thru first row he saw one big paddy but he wonders....may be there is a bigger one later. then he saw another bigger one... but may be there is an even bigger one waiting for him. later when he finished more than half of the padi field he start to realize that the padi is not as big as the previous one he saw he know he has missed the biggest one and he regretted. so he ended up went back to the teacher with empty hand. the teacher told him "...this is love... you keep looking for a better one but when later you realize you have already miss the person "what is marriage then?" the student asked. the teacher said "in order to answer your question go to the corn field and choose the biggest corn and come back. but the rule is: you can go through them only once and cannot turn back to pick." the student went to the corn field this time he is careful not to repeat the previous mistake when he reach the middle of the field he has picked one medium corn that he feel satisfied and came back to the teacher. the teacher told him "this time you bring back a corn.... you look for one that is just nice and you have faith and believe this is the best one you get.... this is marriage."